sweet talk 101
by shugotenshii
Summary: Mute blonde boy meets redheaded boy. Redheaded boy hates blonde boy. Redheaded boy starts hearing voices and having weird dreams. Mute blonde boy and redheaded boy fall in love. The afterlife. akuroku. soriku. zemyx. done.
1. o1 : it was summer

**STORY EDITING DONE ON OCTOBER 9th 2007 (first seven chapters).**

**I finally got so fed up with all these typos and mistakes that I just gave in and went back to fix everything while I still haven't written a book-load of chapters. So I'm suggesting that if you're not new to this fanfic, you go back and reread it :(**

**I'm awfully sorry. But it's been bugging me so much that I just had to go and change things around a little bit. But just a little. So pretty much, one big change will be that Roxas is completely and totaly mute. Yep. **

**At this point, this is another one of mine "Hey-where's-the-plot?" fics. The plot's sure to show up soon.. at some point.. I hope. Just.. I wanted to write something different. I don't know.**

**By the way, all the chapter titles are gonna be the titles of songs.**

**Anyway, I hope you enjoy.**

- - -- - -- - -- - -  
**sweet** talk 101

o1 : **it was summer - october fall**

The day starts out as any other normal day. That doesn't count the _normal_ teens who are dragged out of bed by annoyed parents or fall out themselves, the alarm clock smashing against the wall and laying on the floor in millions of pieces. That doesn't count the world's new records for showering and dressing (three minutes and thirteen seconds) after waking up late. It doesn't count all of the _"Mom! I missed the bus!"_'s. It doesn't count practically flying down the street with your backpack hanging in one hand and your breakfast in the other.

The first day of school is far from _normal._

Especially to the average person who has time for everything. Then again, who _has_ time anymore these days? It's always late, late and late again. Flying into Dunkin Donuts, grabbing an espresso to keep you alive for most part of the day and flying right back out. Everyone's just speeding by.

But that's beside the point.

So the school bell is ringing and new schedules are flying through the halls while kids run around like in a mad house, trying to locate their first class which _just happens to be_ right in front of their nose and they only figure it out after they passed the doorway about seven times. It's one of the many signs that summer is finally slipping away. Out with sleeping late, in with curfew's. Out with tv and video games all day, in with homework and tests. Out with hanging out by the pool everyday with Sea Salt ice cream dripping onto the pavement and in with projects, Drama club, Newspaper club and scary teachers. Oh yay.

Let's skip the hectic and chaotic mess and fast-forward straight to the lunch period, shall we? I mean, who needs to know who set whose pants on fire in Chem., right?

Okay, so here we have the first lunch wave. There were only so much more warm days left so lunch was outside on campus. Ah, there's someone worth pointing out. Red hair, green eyes. Eyeliner. No not there, to your left. Your _other_ left! Yeah, there. See him? Sticks out like a sore thumb, doesn't he? His name's Axel. Want to know why I'm pointing him out? Well, that's where the story starts... or something cliché and cheesy like that...

Axel jumped into his seat at the lunch table, sitting down right in front of a dirty-blond-haired boy. Don't bother asking how many bottles of gel it takes to style the kid's hair into a mullet like that. I don't know.

The dirty-blonde started. ''Don't do that!'' he breathed out, his drink tipping over when he jumped. He quickly righted the can so at least _something_ would stay in.

''Do what, Dem? Breathe?'' Axel asked, quirking an eyebrow. He spun his soda around and then opened it, the contents inside fizzing.

''That!'' Demyx hissed in irritation as he mopped up the spill with an insanely huge pile of napkins. ''Pop out of nowhere. You know I hate when you do that.''

The red-head rolled his eyes and went back to scanning the school grounds. Green orbs finally landed on a mess of spiky chocolate-brown hair and narrowed. Sora Kisaragi. _Ick._ One of the most popular boys in school who was best friends with _the_ most popular boy and girl in school. _Double ick._ Axel always hated the popular people. Those rich, stuck-up, cold-blooded (can't forget absolutely gorgeous) bastards. Or they were to Axel. It wasn't like he knew them to begin with but he knew they were popular and that he hated them with the passion of a thousand and one suns.

Wait, no. Kairi was his sister. He couldn't really hate her just because she was popular. But he did anyway. You would too if you've been living with an Abercrombie-and-Fitch-wearing-ball-of-evil for sixteen years. _Triple ick._ Then again Axel always enjoyed tormenting her with the fact that even though they were twins, he was two and a half minutes older. And taller. And sexier. Mmm.

Ugh, but sometimes he just wanted to wring that pretty little neck of hers. Especially when she had no one to talk and came to him.

_"Axel, Axel! Didja hear? Ya know Sora right? Well, duh. Anyways, his brother is transferring to our school. Isn't that awesome? I heard he was reeaally cute. Blonde hair, big blue eyes, doesn't that sound adorable? Axel? Are you listening to me? Helloooo, yoohoo, earth to Axel!"_

"..el.. AXEL!"

"H-huh? What?" the red-head stammered out, jumping in his seat.

''What, Ax? Checking out Kisaragi?''

Axel made a face, scrunching his nose. ''No! Not that preppy fuck.''

Demyx snorted. Larxene, a blonde with a hairdo that made Axel think of a bug, slid into the seat next to him and snagged his drink.

"Hey! That was _mine_!" Demyx wailed, lunging at her. Larxene snickered and sprayed the blonde with soda.

Axel merely rolled his eyes. _Bunch of douche bags.._

"So," Demyx said after finally reclaiming his drink, "Have you guys seen the new kid? Sora's brother?"

"Oh, yeah," Larxene said. "Blonde? Short?"

"He's not _that_ short."

"What? You've been checking him out?"

"Larxene!!"

Axel sighed and looked back at Sora just so he could glare knives at him. One in his head.. the other in his eye.. Oooh, well, well, well.

"Is that him?" he said, nodding his head at a gathering group.

There was Sora, his arm around a slightly shorter and paler version of himself. Kairi was bouncing around, doing all the talking for him while he stood there and looked like he really didn't want to be there. Riku just hung back, acting as though the whole thing bored him to the extreme.

Demyx stood up, trying to look over a number of heads. ''Yep. Kisaragi number two."

Larxene snorted and nudged Axel's shoulder. "He looks like he wants to kill your sister."

"Let him. I don't care. In fact, I hope he does!"

"Oh, c'mon! She's not that bad." Of course Larxene thought. When Kairi was around other people _and_ Axel, she was on her best behavior. But when they were alone..

"You don't know her like I do!" Axel cried, shaking the blonde's thin shoulders. "She's pure evil! You don't _know_ the things she does to me!" He buried his face in her shoulder, letting out waves of fake, dramatic sobs.

"Quit being such a whiney bitch. People are staring," Larxene grumbled, shoving him off.

Axel scooted away, fake-sniffling until Larxene smacked him in the head. The red-head grumbled and moved farther away. He would get her back for this, he swore it.

Larxene folded her arms across her chest to keep from doing any more damage. Last time she let herself go, she got stuck going to Guidance for two weeks.

"So, you guys going to Zex's party tonight?" Demyx asked, blushing lightly. It wasn't really Zexion's party, it was his brothers. Demyx just liked the emo kid.

"Mmmyes," Axel purred, quite happy now. Whenever there was a party, everyone came. Yes, even the 'preppy fucks' like Kairi. But Axel knew he could escape her evil clutches by losing himself in the crowd. It always worked. Mmmm, freedom from his sister. He felt like getting up on the lunch table and dancing. Only he didn't.

"I heard there's gonna be a DJ," Demyx piped up again. "Man, good thing today's Friday, huh? I mean, someone, must've been an idiot to have school start on a Friday, but it's good for us 'cos.."

_Oh, here we go,_ Axel thought. Demyx was rambling. His near-bleeding ears were saved when the bell rang, signaling the end of lunch. Just five more periods and Axel was freefreefreeee.

x.x.x

"Aaax_eel_, have you seen my black t-shirt? Y'know, the one with all the designs on it and stuff?"

Said red-head, looked up from his magazine (what? it was on music!) at Kairi with narrowed, emerald eyes to see her standing in his doorway, hands on her hips, wearing nothing but a towel. Ew.

"Kairi, why would _I_ have _anything_ to do with your clothes?"

"How should I know?"

"And how should _I_ know where your damn shirt is? Just find something else to wear, for Christ's sake, not like you're going to impress someone. It's a friggin' _party._ So **party.**"

"For _your_ information, I _am_ trying to impress somebody," Kairi said snootily, flipping back her wet bangs.

"Oh, and who would that be?" Axel asked, without much interest. He just wanted to make fun of her.

"That would be _Roxas._"

Axel raised his eyebrows. Hadn't he heard that name somewhere at school? Huh. "Who's Roxas?"

Kairi's jaw dropped open and she gave her brother an incredulous look. "That's Sora's brother! I can't believe you don't know his name!"

"Sorry, we haven't been introduced yet," Axel said, now _very_ disinterested. If he was Sora's brother, then he was bound to be just like him. Then again, he didn't seem too happy today...

"Oh. My. GOD. He is the _sweetest, cutest, most innocent thing I've ever met_-"

Oh, so he's not a person? He's a thing? Typical Kairi. Axel let his eyes wander back to his magazine.

"And Sora said that Roxas doesn't talk much, but I just think he _shyyy_. Or did he say he was mute..? And I think maybe he likes me cuz he didn't really look at me-"

Or maybe he just thinks you're the most annoying, distasteful person he's ever laid eyes on. Or maybe you stop wearing so many colors. You probably blinded the kid. Axel flipped a page.

"So I think I'm gonna ask him out at the party. Ooooh, I know we'll make a cute couple! Everyone would be talking about us and they'll all be so jealous because _I_ went out with him before anyone else did-"

You'll probably scare the hell out of him anyway, so don't count on him saying yes.

"Axel? Are you even listening to me?"

The red-head flicked his eyes up and nodded.

"Then what was the last thing I said?"

"''Then what was the last thing I said'."

Kairi threw her hands up and stormed to her room, slamming the door behind her. Axel was surprised he didn't hear picture frames fall from the walls.

Axel sat up on his bed and stretched. He got up, shut the door and turned up the light from his lamp. Now then. What. To. Wear? Of course, since he wasn't like Kairi, he wasn't going to tear apart his whole closet... no... he only did that once.

He looked at himself at the mirror hanging from his closet. He could keep the jeans. A few minutes of digging through the closet gave him one good result. A black t-shirt with the words "ROLE MODEL" splattered in white across the front. Ahhh.. from the days of Simple Plan. Axel scratched his cheek and then slipped it on. At least it still fit... and was clean. Not too bad.

Picking up a sweatshirt from the foot of his bed, he hung it over his shoulders and stepped out into the hallway.

"Yo! Kai! I'm leaving!"

"Nooo! I'm almost done!" came the reply.

Axel rolled his eyes and halted at the foot of the stairs. Crossed his arms. Hummed. Tapped his foot.

"KAIRI!"

The door to his sister's room opened and Kairi whizzed by into the bathroom. "You dick, give me a sec!"

Axel groaned and followed her, hoping to talk her into picking up the pace. Kairi flicked on the light and Axel had to squint against the glare that bounced off the marble sinks.

"We're gonna be late," the red-head grumbled, leaning against the doorjamb as Kairi swiped on mascara. Whoa.. hold the phone..

"What are you _wearing_, Kairi?" Axel asked, horrified.

"What?" she asked, planting her hands on her hips and turning to face her brother. Kairi had outfitted herself in a blindingly pink mini-skirt, skin-tight black tank top (she hadn't found her shirt after all) and her usual pink slip-on sneakers. As if her skirt wasn't bright enough.. both wrists were sporting bangles in colors of the rainbow. She looked like a neon sign that screamed "I'M A SLUT!"

"Y-you.. go.. change.. now.." Axel managed, shutting his jaw.

"What? Why? I think it looks nice."

"If nice is the new definition of whore!"

"Axel! I'm telling this time that you called me a whore."

"She would think so too! In fact, she would skip the thinking and have a heart-attack on the spot. And then she'll kill you. You're so lucky she and dad are at work right not or they'd both kill you, never mind the heart-attack. Go change!"

"No! You can't tell me what to do!" Kairi screamed, clenching her fists so hard her knuckles were turning white. The girl had a pretty hard punch, actually. "And don't give me any bullshit that you're my older brother just because you were born two and a half minutes earlier! You're not the fucking boss of me!"

"Fine," Axel spat, seething. "But don't blame me if someone tries to rape you."

"No one will!" Kairi screeched. She flicked back her bangs and left in a snooty huff. Axel merely stood there and took in deep breaths, trying to keep himself from getting the kitchen knife.

After he was sure he was calmed down, Axel turned the light off and went into his room to get his car keys. Twirling them in his hand, he ran downstairs and slipped into his Converses. Kairi was waiting at the door, her denim jacket hanging over her petite frame. She kept her glance anywhere as long as it wasn't Axel.

After making sure the lock was turned and lights were off, both left the house and made their way down the dark lawn to Axel's dark blue, two-door BMW. Not like his family was filthy rich, but at least they could afford decent cars. Kairi was in her seats only seconds after Axel had unlocked the door and she turned up the radio as soon as Axel started the engine.

_Better to let her fume and do what she wants for a while,_ Axel thought, as the silence was broken by Jesse McCartney. Eww. _Otherwise she'll be mad for weeks._

They stayed that way for the duration of the ride, the only noise coming from the radio. The music made Axel want to gag. Ashlee Simpson, Ciara, Rihanna-_Britney Spears?_ He almost pulled over and wretched.

_Think of the party, think of the party, for the love of all that is sane, think of the damn party.._

His wishes were finally answered when the car pulled up in front of a mansion-sized house. The windows were flashing blues, greens, pinks, and yellows and the loud bass from the music could be heard from outside. Axel finally found a spot to park his car and he and Kairi stepped out onto neatly trimmed and watered grass. Kairi went in a hurry. Axel leaned back against his car for a few moments and stared up at Zexion's house. Beer, cigarettes, chicks.. mmm. Today had been the first day of school and tonight was probably the last day of actual freedom these teenagers had. After the weekend would pass it would be nothing but load after load of homework, studying, quizzes, tests, exams...

Axel was ready to enjoy himself to the fullest.

x.x.x

**Wow. I'm amazing myself. I'm **_**already**_** writing chapter two. Heh, but I want some reviews before I post it. At least five? Pleeeaaase? ((puppydogeyes))**

**And yes.. Sora's last name is Kisaragi.. which means it's Roxas's last name too. Which MEANS that they have Yuffie as a sister... yes, I'm weird.**


	2. o2 : champagne for my real friends

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**sweet** talk 101

o2 : **champagne for my real friends, real pain for my sham friends - fall out boy**

Axel had barely stepped through the doorway when Kairi latched onto his arm, screaming, "Come meet Roxas!" over and over again. She seemed to have forgotten about her fight with her brother. They pushed their way through the moving bodies (or rather Kairi pushed her way through while Axel was dragged along) to the other side of the living room. Or what was a living room. Where Axel remembered a rug and coffee table was now a dance floor and couches and loveseats and chairs were pushed up against the walls.

Axel caught a flash of silver. He did _not_ want to see a silver-haired certain somebody, his brown-haired companion and the thing's _brother_. What he wanted was to go off and find his own friends. Dance a little. Smoke a cigarette. Get himself and a girl into a bedroom. Oh, dear god, _yes_, they're leaving! Wait.. no..

"Axel, Axel, this is Roxas!" Kairi had let go of Axel and looped her arm through a certain blonde's who looked a lot like Sora. Except the hair was styled a bit differently. What really got Axel's attention was the kid's body language. The closer Kairi got to him, the more uncomfortable he seemed. He practically screamed "GET THE HELL AWAY, BITCH." Axel didn't blame him. Hell, you'd be the same way too if you had boobs pressing into your arm. Possibly.

''Roxas, huh?'' Axel repeated, the name like crushed ice on his tongue. "The name's Axel. Commit it to memory."

Kairi giggled. If you didn't know her well enough, you'd think she was trying to cut off the circulation to Roxas's arm. "Roxas, Axel's my brother. He's a total dick, but I _guess_ he can be nice sometimes."

_Oh, yeah, sure,_ Axel thought, _make me look like the bad guy. The kid probably thinks I'm gonna pop out of nowhere one of these days and kick his ass or something._

Roxas waved meekly. Kairi giggled again and pushed herself closer to Roxas. He just looked like he wanted to stab Kairi with a tazer, _zap!_ Axel actually found himself feeling some sympathy toward the poor kid. He wouldn't want to get molested by Kairi either.

_Okay.. ew.. just.. stop thinking.._

Okay, he wouldn't normally be doing this for a prep.. especially Sora's _brother.._ but he'd make one tiny exception today.. "Say, Kairi, the kid looks dehydrated. Get him a beer or something will you?"

"Roxas doesn't drink," Kairi stated. She sounded like she was showing off her prized poodle at the Eukanuba Dog Tournament.

_Heheh.. Roxas... as a poodle.._

"Then get him some water or something."

"Why don't _you_ go get it?"

"Because. I'm not going to be able to have a normal conversation with him if you keep hogging him. Now get."

Kairi stuck out her tongue but let go of Roxas. She probably didn't want to seem rude in front of him or some bullshit like that. But Axel heard her mutter "fucknut" as she brushed past.

Once Kairi was out of sight, Axel turned his attention back to Roxas. "C'mon."

Roxas raised an eyebrow.

"Do you _want_ her to come back and hang all over you? Plus, she's my sister. I heard her say she wants to ask you out."

Roxas's eye's widened and he stepped closer to Axel. The red-head smirked and motioned the kid to follow him with a jerk of his head. He cleverly side-stepped dancing teens, couples making out, making sure every now and then that Roxas was following.

After going through a kitchen the size of an apartment, Axel pushed open a glass door, stepping out onto the back porch and the chilly night air. The backyard was illuminated by dozens of light bulbs and people were jumping in and out of the pool. Axel led Roxas to a waist-high brick wall the separated the flower garden from the backyard.

Axel sat up on the wall and dug through his sweatshirt for a lighter and cigarette. Roxas merely stood by, looking like he had been dropped from the sky and these were his first steps on earth.

"Well?" Axel asked, taking a deep drag on his cigarette and feeling the smoke hang in his lungs. Cancer. Yay. "You just gonna stand there looking dumb?"

Roxas's eyebrows furrowed and he frowned. It looked more like a pout. Axel let his eyes wander, finally being able to see the boy in more proper lighting.

Sure there was a deep resemblance between him and Sora. But Axel picked out the differences too. While Sora was tan, Roxas's skin was paler, like cream. While Sora's eyes were deep sapphire blue, Roxas's were bright cobalt. While Sora's brown hair stuck up in wild directions, Roxas's was a dusky blonde, like a sunset and spikier, sticking up more to one side then in all directions and spiking out on the sides and back. In actuality, they didn't really look the same at all.

Axel blinked. _Dusky blonde like a sunset?_ Wow, someone was feeling poetic tonight. So instead of dwelling further on those thoughts, Axel took in another drag, tilting his head back to the sky. Too bright for stars. Again.

Roxas frowned slightly and stuffed his hands in his pockets, glancing around a bit. When Sora had asked him to come to have a bit of fun, this wasn't exactly what Roxas had in mind. Where was the fun? Certainly not that kid trying to dunk another kid in that pool. Oh.. was he drowing?

"Well?" Axel said, looking back at Roxas. "What're you standing around for? I got you away from Kairi. What do you expect me to do now? Make friends with you and make daisy chains and friendship bracelets?" He puffed a ring of smoke at Roxas's face. _He's Sora's brother. What's there to expect out of the kid? He's the same as the rest of them. I can see it._

The blonde scowled. What the hell is _up_ with this guy? One minute he's nice and the next he's an asshole.

"Sooo.." Axel started, blowing out a cloud of smoke. "Kairi says you don't talk much. Why not?"

Roxas shrugged.

"Nothing good to say?"

Roxas shrugged again.

"Is shrugging all you can do?"

Roxas glared.

Axel laughed. "What's with the look, kid, eh? Hey, if you do nothing but shrug, we're not gonna get anywhere."

Roxas lifted his chin, crossing his arms stubbornly. Axel laughed harder. "You're just like him! He gives me the _same, exact_ look. Haha, you're no different from your brother or any of them. You're like a little clone!" He reached over and flicked the blonde's forehead.

Roxas grabbed the cigarette from Axel's fingers and breathed in, blowing smoke in the other's surpirsed face. Then he threw the cigarette down at Axel's feet and stalked off.

Axel merely sat there and smirked.

(And then the cigarette set the grass on fire. ...kidding.)

x.x.x

There was nothing more to the party. People danced. Hell, the whole house danced, shaking the ground. People got drunk. Axel got drunk. He got drunk to the point he was clinging to Demyx and Kairi and calling them his "Little Caterpillars."

...Don't ask.

Demyx calls Axel a retard, Kairi gets fed up and leaves with Riku and Sora. Axel goes home later and nearly drives into a telephone pole. He saw someone drive into a telephone pole once. It snapped in half and car looked like a accordion. Axel reminded himself not to drink and drive. But he was still drunk, so what was the point in that? He drove home, minding his speed, his brain fuzzy (how is that _possible_?). He hadn't seen Roxas since the kid left. He hadn't seen Roxas all weekend either, though he had to put up with Kairi's constant "Roxas-shall-be-mine" rants. Wait. No. That sounded like a good idea. Roxas and Kairi. Mmm. Tormenting.

And that's how Axel's little obsession begins.

x.x.x


	3. 03 : this ain't a scene

- - - -- - - - - - - --  
sweet **talk** 101

o3 : **this ain't a scene, it's a goddamn arms race - fall out boy**

Books went flying, papers shooting out across the hall and a body sprawled on the floor. Head's turned. Some people whispered, others snickered, a few gasped.

There was a cough. Dark cobalt eyes traveled up to meet familiar Converses, familiar ripped jeans, familiar sweatshirt, a familiar smirk, familiar peridot green eyes and familiar crimson hair.

"My, my, my. Clumsy, now aren't we?"

Roxas growled, pushing himself up on his elbows. Sora rushed over, pulling Roxas up by the arm.

"Jeez, Axel, what the hell is your friggin' problem?!"

"You two are," Axel replied, smirk growing at Roxas's visible anger. "You should really watch where you're going, Roxas. Clumsy and blind." Axel was pushing the blonde's buttons and waiting for a reaction. And boy did he get a reaction.

Roxas tore away from Sora and launched at Axel, pinning the older boy to the wall. Axel slipped away, pulled Roxas's arms back, who in turn tripped Axel. The struggle went on like that for a while until Axel had Roxas pushed up against the lockers, pulling the boy's arms behind his back. The blonde struggled, growling in his throat, but couldn't move.

"Heh, you've got fight in you," Axel said, chuckling in Roxas's ear. "Maybe not so much like Sora."

The Axel released his hold on the blonde and was gone before Roxas had even turned around. He stood there, rubbing his arms, not knowing where to look since everyone was staring at him. There was even a new dent in one of the rust-red lockers, staring at him too, forever reminding him of what happened.

"Well? Go on!" Sora yelled, waving his hands at the group. "Don't you have better things to do?"

There was a collective murmur and the crowd slowly dispersed.

"Hey, Rox? You okay?" Sora asked as he helped his brother pick up his stuff. Roxas didn't respond, only kept his eyes down.

When Roxas's things were back in his bag, the blonde snatched it from Sora and shoved past him.

Sora pouted slightly and shuffled off to his next class. Art.

"Why the long face, So?" Riku asked as the brunette dropped his bag on the floor and slumped into the chair next to him.

"Mmmh.. Roxas is pissed at me. Cuz I stood up for him," Sora said, rolling his eyes a bit. He crossed his arms on the table and buried his face in them.

"Why? He get into a fight _already?_"

"Yeah.. Axel."

Sora heard Riku let out a snort. "God, that guy's such a stupid fuck..."

"I mean, I know Roxas might think that I'm, like, babysitting him, but he's in a new school! I mean, you'd think he'd want _some_ help.." Sora pouted at the black table. It didn't give a response.

"Listen, So," Riku said, nudging his friend in the shoulder. "I know you're worried but Roxas is like, what, sixteen? I think he can take care of himself."

Sora muttered a reluctant agreement and doodled on the desktop with his pencil. A shiny metallic heart now adorned the top.

x.x.x

It went on like this for most of the week. Axel would do anything possible to get on the kid's nerves. Why? Because he never really fought back. Unless you count that first time where Axel tripped him in the hallway. Well... actually...

There were a few times in Chem. where Axel switched Roxas's beaker with another formula. It blew up. Until, of course, Roxas found out and then _Axel_ was the one having his face being practically blown off.

Axel's little war raged on violently and loudly.

Roxas was a silent fighter with a quick temper.

In gym class, Axel laughed when Roxas missed a serve. Roxas set the ball and spiked it at Axel's face. He never missed _that_.

"..el.. AXEL!"

Axel jumped, nearly falling off of lunch table bench. "Jesus Christ! What!"

Larxene rolled her eyes, resting her chin back in her hand. "Alright, what's the deal with you? You've been spazzing out more than usual. I don't think I've ever seen you devote so much attention to a kid just to make his life miserable."

"Ah, but that's the point. I want his life to be completely miserable."

"..Why?"

Axel shrugged. "It's fun."

Larxene sighed and shook her head, not seeing the point in all of this.

Axel, on the other hand, was having the most fun he'd had in a long while. Roxas was like a challenge. Something new. The kid just _wouldn't_ break, no matter what Axel tried. He'd become obsessed in trying. He wanted to break him. See him shatter into satisfying little pieces. Hah. Just like throwing stones at a glass moon.

x.x.x

"Fight! Fight! Fight! Fight!"

The students chorused the same word over and over as blood red met with ash blonde.

"Alright kid, let's see how well you can fight."

Roxas growled in his throat. Why did Axel have to be such a fucking douche bag? Why couldn't he just lay off for _one fucking day?_ Roxas couldn't really say that he _hated_ the red-head. Oh, no, of course not. Roxas _despised_ him. With a passion. With the white hot intensity of a thousand and one suns.

Well. That was deep.

Before Roxas could even take a swing at him, Axel grabbed the boy in a headlock, pushing him against the brick wall of the school.

_Stained blood red. Such a pretty color. Like your hair._

Oh god, how Roxas would've loved to have just turned around and beat the shit out of Axel. But he was pinned to the wall.

Pinned like a fucking butterfly.

Oh so delicate, but not so easy to catch. Not like it matters. Once you're caught, your wings are ripped off your body and you're stomped into the dirt. Bye-bye butterfly.

Roxas growled in frustration, squirming against Axel's hold. The red-head only tightened his grip around his prey's neck.

"Axel, let him go!" came a shrill voice.

The chants of the crowding students died down. The moment Axel saw his sister try to push herself through the crowd, his hold on Roxas loosened slightly. Roxas took that chance and shoved Axel back, rubbing his abused neck. It also didn't help that about half the school was staring at him.

"What do you think you're doing?" Kairi screeched, bringing her face close to Axel's. The red-head could actually smell the strawberry shampoo she used that morning.

"Standing here," Axel replied smartly.

Kairi huffed and smacked Axel right across the face. The crowd "ooh"d and even Roxas seemed a bit surprised. Axel was the only one unfazed. He only stuck his thumbs in the pockets of his jeans and casually walked away. Just like that. Everyone else slowly walked off, muttered to each other.

"Hey, you alright?" Kairi asked, placing her hand on Roxas's shoulder. "Do you need to see the nurse or anything?"

Roxas shook his head curtly. He jerked away from Kairi and picked up his bag, which had been laying on the ground. And with that, he walked off.

x.x.x

Later that evening, Sora told his mom about what had happened to Roxas at school (he'd heard from Kairi). Roxas, who had been sitting on the couch and watching tv, flicked his eyes to the two and narrowed them.

"Roxas," Satsuki said finally, "Maybe.. this isn't such a good idea. I think you should go back to your old school."

Roxas's eyes widened and he shook his head.

"Look, it's either that, or you keeping getting into more fights at school with that boy." Satsuki placed her hands on her hips, giving Roxas a stern look.

Roxas only shook his head and turned his attention back to the tv. And that was the end of that conversation.

"Fine," his mother huffed, throwing up her hands. "Come home with a broken arm for all I care." She would rather be stuck in a room with a snake than try to argue with her son.

Sora frowned and sat by Roxas after Satsuki went back into the kitchen.

"Look, I know you don't like your old school, but if you keep fighting with Axel like this, you could end up getting hurt-"

Or end up breaking _his_ nose. Roxas flicked past another channel.

"Or you could end up getting in trouble, like getting suspended, or expelled-"

Like those teachers give a shit about who's fighting who. Roxas stopped on MTV.

"And all of this can make you fall behind in your school work-"

Like _you_ actually care about school work.

"And Kairi's getting really worried too-"

Kairi's fucking _scary_.

"Roxas! Are you listening to me."

Roxas gave Sora a sidelong glance and nodded.

"Oh? Then what was the last thing I said?"

Roxas gave his brother the finger and headed upstairs to his room, leaving a slightly stunned Sora on the couch. Tomorrow was Friday and then Roxas was free of Axel for two and a half days. Unless Fate decided to be one son-of-a-bitch.

x.x.x


	4. o4 : love one and only

-- -- - - - - -- -- -- --  
**sweet** talk 101

o4 : **love one and only - timbaland ft. patrick stumph**

_Puuurrrr..._

Roxas groaned and stirred. It felt like there was a motor lying by his ear. He rolled over onto his stomach and lifted himself up on his elbows. The clock on the nightstand red 6:16 AM in bright read letters. Roxas sighed and tilted his head in the other direction. Lying on the pillow next to him was a fluffy, cinnamon-colored ball of fur. Roxas smiled slightly and scratched it behind its ears. There was a soft mew and a pair of hazel eyes blinked at him.

Roxas pulled back his hand, flipped over onto his back and stretched. Saaaaturdaaaay. No more Axel. At least for two days. The blonde narrowed his eyes and frowned at the ceiling. Who did that stupid fucker think he was anyway? Walking around with that "I-don't-give-a-shit" attitude. Purposely making his life hell.

A malicious grin spread on Roxas's face. He'd get the red-head back for this, he swore it. Then his scowl returned. Why was he even thinking about Axel in the first place? This was _supposed_ to an Axel-free weekend, yet the red-head still managed to squirm his way into Roxas's thoughts.

Roxas sat up and stretched again. Now that he was awake, there would be no point in trying to getting back to sleep.

x.x.x

When Axel woke up at about seven in the morning, the first thing he noticed was the black carpeting. Right. In. His. Face.

"Shit," Axel hissed, bolting upright. He crawled back into his bed and fell heavily on the sheets. Seven in the morning was just too fucking early to be waking up. But his mind stubbornly refused to shut down. So Axel had no choice but to drag himself out of bed.

Kairi was already downstairs in the kitchen, spreading jam on a piece of toast. "Morning, asshole!" she greeted cheerfully.

"Hey, bitch," Axel replied, not too enthusiastic about it.

Yes. This was completely normal.

"Mom and dad left a note saying they went to work early."

Axel made a grunt of acknowledgement and swiped Kairi's toast from her hand. So Kairi punched Axel in the side of the head. Yes, this was pretty much their daily routine.

"Sooo.." Kairi started, taking a seat on the kitchen counter. "What're you gonna be doing for today?"

Axel paused mid-bite and raised an eyebrow at his sister. Kairi almost _never_ asked him what his plans were because, hell, she didn't really care. Something was up. She was plotting, Axel knew it.

"Um... nothing..." Axel said slowly. He _could _always call Demyx or something but he was hoping to have the whole day just to himself.

"Because, well..." Kairi trailed off for a moment, twirling a piece of cranberry-red hair around her fingers. "...Well, I was thinking that I'd go over to Sora's house today."

"So... why exactly are you telling me this?"

"I was thinking that if you didn't have anything better to do, that you'd come with me."

Axel nearly dropped the remains of his (well, Kairi's) toast on the floor. "..._**What**_?"

Kairi nodded and crossed her arms, giving Axel a pointed stare. "You heard me."

"Oh, hell no," Axel said, turning his attention back on finishing his food.

"Oh, hell yes," Kairi said, now frowning. "Look, I think you need to apologize to Roxas-"

She was interrupted by a wave of hysterical laughter.

"I'm _SERIOUS_ Axel! Why do you keep messing with him and getting him into fights? What the _hell_ did he ever do to you?"

"He exists," Axel replied smugly. "Plus, it's fun."

"You barely even _know_ him, you asshole!"

"I don't need to know him to see he's just like you and the rest of your petty little friends."

Yes. Axel seemed to have a.. problem.. with judging people by their cover. Of course.. those could've always been the remains of a bad childhood crawling back out at him. But it didn't give him much of a good relationship with other people.

Kairi huffed, glaring knives and daggers and pins and needles at Axel.

"Alright, alright," Axel said, walking over to Kairi and leaning closer until their noses touched. "_Prove_ me wrong. Try it."

"Fine," Kairi hissed, narrowing her eyes. "I will. You'll see."

Axel leaned back, a smirk gracing his lips.

And boy, would he see.

x.x.x

"Hey, Roxas," Sora said, poking his head into the bathroom where the blonde was currently brushing his teeth. "Kairi just called. She said she wants to go to the mall with you, Yuffie, Riku and me.." Sora trailed off, his eyebrows furrowing. "..She said Axel was coming."

Roxas nearly choked on his toothbrush. He looked up at Sora, eyes wide.

"I have no clue," Sora said, shrugging. "I told her it might've not been a good idea considering.. uhn.. well, things between you two.. but she just interrupted me and hung up saying she'll be over in half an hour..."

Roxas groaned and rested his forehead on the edge of the sink. Stupid, _stupid_ Kairi. So Fate really _did_ decide to be a bitch. Or maybe it was just his enemy's sibling.

Roxas finished brushing his teeth before rinsing out his mouth and turning back to Sora, his arms crossed.

_I am __not__ going._

Sora seemed to understand just by Roxas's look. "Look, man, I don't mind if you don't want to go, but Kairi really seems to want you to come.. and.. well.. You should just go. And if things start getting out of hand, we can just go home."

Roxas rolled his eyes and brushed past Sora to his room.

_Like __hell__ things'll get out of hand. It's gonna be a disaster.._

And so, about half an hour later, Roxas was sitting on his bed, still in his pajama pants.

"Roxas.." Sora groaned. He was already dressed in his usual black shorts and a red plain shirt. "C'mooon, Kairi gonna be here an second!"

Roxas shook his head and crossed his arms stubbornly.

"Quit being such a kid."

Roxas raised an eyebrow and smirked. _I could say the same for you. _

Sora merely sighed and walked over to his brother's closet. He fished out a pair of black jeans and a clean gray t-shirt with the Element logo on it. He threw the clothes to Roxas.

"Jeez, Rox. It's a little thing called the _laundry._"

Roxas rolled his eyes but did not proceed to put the clothes on.

"Roxassss.." Sora growled, tapping his foot.

No response.

"Fine. Looks like I'll just have to dress you myself."

Roxas's eyes widened considerably and he frantically shook his head. _I'm not fucking coming, dammit!_

_**NO!**_

x.x.x

By the time Kairi and Axel arrived, Roxas was finally dressed. Except his left cheek was red and the was a small bruise on Sora's jaw. And Roxas wasn't speaking (duh) or looking Sora's way.

"Uhm... are you two_ okay_?" Kairi asked, eyeing their small injuries.

"Yeah, yeah," Sora mumbled. His eyes traveled over Kairi's shoulder. "Um.. hi, Axel.."

Axel nodded at Sora, not too keen on speaking to him. The awkward silence stretched for a moment until Kairi decided to speak up.

"Ah, Riku called me and said he'll meet us up at the mall. And, uh, where's Yuffie?"

As if on cue, the fourteen-year-old came bounding down the stairs.

"Kairi!" she screeched, tackling the older girl into a sort of.. glomphug. Roxas pretended to gag in the background.

That's when Axel's bottle green landed on the blonde. Roxas looked back and narrowed his eyes. Axel only smiled smugly.

Roxas scowled and lifted his chin a bit. _Wipe that smile off your fucking face._

Either Axel was a mind-reader or what, Roxas didn't know, but the red-head's smile morphed into a smirk. Or maybe it was just him.

"Sorry to break up your 'bonding,' but we should get going," Sora said, eyeing Axel and Roxas as though he was waiting for them to spring at each other.

Roxas frowned at the word "bonding" and hit Sora upside the head. _Were not._

"We're leaving mom!" Sora called. Without waiting for a response, he closed the door and started making his way down the sidewalk to Kairi's car.Well, actually it was her mom's mini-van.. what? How do expect to hold five people in a little sport's car?

Kairi and Yuffie took the front seats while Axel, Sora and Roxas took the back. Axel got in first and then Roxas purposely shoved Sora in next. It would be a cold day in hell the day Roxas Kisaragi would sit next to _Axel._ The red-head didn't even mind. Hell, he barely seemed to care anyway.

"So.." Sora said, turning to face Axel. "What do you like to do?"

"Set poor little squirrels on fire," Axel replied, grinning at Sora. God, the kid's expression was priceless.

"Don't listen to him, Sora," Kairi grumbled from the front seat. Sora nodded but scooted closer to Roxas. Axel chuckled under his breath and turned his attention back to the window.

Roxas, on the other hand, would give (almost) anything to just jump out of the window and hightail it back home. He was _not, __**NOT,**_ spending an entire day with Axel around. Like _hell_ he would!

"We're here, Roxas.. Roxas? ROXAS!"

The said blonde jumped in his seat and whirled around to face his brother. ...And promptly hit their foreheads together.

"Ow!" Sora yelped, rubbing a hand on his now-bruised forehead. Roxas glared back and did the same.

"Jeez, Roxas.. you don't have to give me brain damage y'know.." Sora mumbled, scooting around Roxas to slip out the door. Kairi locked the doors and started making her way to the mall entrance with everyone else in tow. Only Roxas lagged behind.

_I didn't even want to come. I don't even wanna friggin' __be__ here.. And why the hell did Kairi bring Axel?! Is she __trying__ to make us kill each other?_

Roxas's bottom lip jutted out in a pout, his eyes locked on the back of Axel's spikey head and trying to drill daggers into it. That was a satisfactory image.

Everyone was already inside yet Roxas paused at the sliding doors. He could take a chance and just hightail it out of there. _Or_ he could go with everyone else and hide behind Sora or something. Then again, he could just suck it up and-

"You comin', Blondie?" a smooth voice breathed in Roxas's ear, making the boy jump.

"Thought so," Axel said. He hooked he thumbs in his jean pockets and sauntered inside, leaving a slightly inebriated Roxas to quietly walk after him.

x.x.x


	5. o5 : keep them separated

-- - - -- - - - -- - -- -  
sweet **talk** 101

o5 : **keep them separated - the offspring**

Axel is now thinking that maybe he's found a new hobby. _Teasing_ Roxas. The look on the boy's face had been priceless. Pure gold. Better than taking a punch to the kid and pinning him against a wall.

...Maybe not.

So now he was walking by his sister taking notice that Roxas was purposely lagging behind with a furious pout on his face. He really didn't want to be here. Honestly. Roxas _might've_ tagged along but that was only because he was scared shitless of Kairi. Hell, if he had the choice, he would've glued himself to his bedroom floor for the next millennia. Roxas's lip jutted out even more. Axel almost laughed. Cute.

Axel froze mid-step. He did _not_ just think that. Not about _that_ little fuck. Though, of course, he had to admit-_no! No way, I swear, if I think like that again, I'll drop a piano on myself._ The thought was seriously odd.

"..el.. AXEL!"

Said retard - I mean, redhead jumped.

"You gonna stand there looking like a dork?" Kairi asked, hands on her hips.

"You gonna stand there, looking like a dork looking at me?" Axel asked, imitating Kairi's posture just for shits and giggles.

"Can we go find Riku?" Sora asked, pouting slightly.

Axel grinned like the Cheshire Cat. "Your _boyfriend_ prolly ditched you."

"One," Sora ground out, his face suddenly flushed a very pretty shade of red, "he is _not_ my _boyfriend._ Two, he _told_ me he'd be _waiting_ at the food court. Third, keep out of things that aren't your business."

"Oooh, lookie here. Sora can count."

"Shut _up_, already!"

"Getting defensive, Sora?"

"You're such a dick," Sora grumbled, turning away and resuming walking.

"At least I _have_ a dick."

Sora groaned in frustration. Needless to say, Roxas was impressed.

"Tell me again why you brought him?" Sora mumbled to Kairi once he was sure Axel was out of earshot.

"Because I want him to stop fighting with Roxas. Get on friendlier terms with him."

"..You _do_ know that's not gonna work, right?"

"It so will."

"Kai, they're gonna tear at each other's throats until they're dead and bleeding their guts out on the floor with their bones lying around them in little pieces. I don't see why you're trying anyway. It's a waste of time. It'd be ten times easier to just keep those two apart. Just imagine how much blood and bones we could save!"

"I _care _because I don't like seeing Roxas get hurt and my asshole of a brother needs to learn a lesson."

Sora sighed and rolled his eyes. "I still don't see where you're going with this-oh! There's Riku!"

The older, silver-haired teen was leaning comfortably against a table, smoothie in hand, His eyes flicked up when he heard his name and visibly brightened.

"Maaan, took you long enough," Riku drawled. Then his eyes fell on Axel. "What the hell is he-"

"NO," Kairi mouthed. Riku raised an eyebrow as Kairi shook her head slightly. He and Sora exchanged glances.

"It's her secret plan!" Yuffie said, bouncing excitedly on her heels.

"Plan? What plan?" Axel chirped. Kairi had a plan? _Wait, no, Axel, don't look interested._ He yawned.

"Her plan of _ultimate doom!_" Yuffie said, wiggling her fingers in Axel's face. Axel snapped at them. Yuffie shrieked.

"Shut it, Or we'll get thrown out. Again," Riku said, handing his half-finished smoothie to a puppy-dog-eyed Sora. "Is Roxas hiding somewhere around here?"

Everyone turned around to look. He was here a second ago, right? ...Right? Ah, there he was, standing a few feet back, contently blocking out the world with his headphones, and coiling the headphone cord around his tongue.

_Is that a tongue ring?_ Axel thought, touching his own to the roof of his mouth. Yep. Axel found himself thining about what it'd be like to french someone else with a tongue ring.

...That'd be wicked.

...With Roxas?

Axel's eye spasmed and he shook his head.

Was he gay? Wait, that was a stupid question. But why the flying fuck was he having these thoughts about the blonde?

...Let's just leave Axel to his pretty little thoughts for now and focus in on Kairi and Yuffie.

"You you think that your plan of ultimate doom will work?" Yuffie whispered to Kairi, once they were farther ahead of the group by a considerable amount.

"Totally," Kairi said, smirking. Kairi knew because her plans always worked. Always! They have never failed and won't start now. She swore it.

Yuffie rolled her eyes. "Roxas has been living, like, under his little community rock for, like, ever. He has his little group of friends. Therefore, your plan of ultimate doom will go right down the toilet."

"It will not. My plan my not be perfect, but it sure'll work. And it's not only for Roxas and Axel. It's also for Riku and Sora.." Kairi nearly cackled.

"Hey, what secrets are you two keeping?" Sora called, trying to keep his smoothie from Riku's grasp. Riku wanted his smoothie back, dammit!

Kairi turned to face the brunette, smiling sweetly. "Oh, nothing you should worry your pretty little head about, Sora, dear."

Sora raised an eyebrow at Kairi. That was scary. When Kairi got that look and said things like that, weird things were going to happen. Like, having a watermelon fall on your head sort of weird. And then releasing watermelon-eating rabid dogs upon you sort of weird. Sora shuddered.

"You okay, Sora?" Riku asked, nudging his (_all-time crush, obsession, one-and-only-true-love_) friend in the shoulder.

"Y-yeah.. fine.. great.. fantastic.." Sora said, his eye twitching slightly.

We pan back to Axel (and Roxas).

Axel snuck a glance behind him to see a dangerously brooding Roxas. Okay, never mind the fact that he was a preppy little fuck, but the kid was also emo. Can someone be preppy _and_ emo at the same time? Maybe he was just emo.

_Maybe he has a ten foot pole stuck sideways up his ass,_ Axel thought moodily. Then again, why should he care? Kairi wanted him to get on friendlier terms with Roxas, though she never said exactly how. So without an explanation, Axel wasn't going to do it.

Roxas seemed to be perfectly content in imagining himself locked in a hamster ball, keeping all of the mean, bad kitties away. So that made Axel a bad kitty too?

Axel "hmph"d and marched on. He didn't need this. He didn't need it at all. And in his march of haughtiness, he had not looked where he was going and bumped right into Riku. It created almost of a mini domino effect because then Riku fell into Sora.

...And they were talking.

...And Yuffie and Kairi were about to ask Riku and Sora something.

...And Axel pushed Riku right into Sora.

Now, one might think of this as the romantic cliché moment where boy falls forward, kissing his one true love by accident, which quickly morphs into a hot, steamy make-out session, and then hot, kinky sex right in the middle of the mall. But nooooo, Fate decided to be a bitch. Fate wanted to have a little fun. And boy oh boy would Fate get a show. ...That bitch.

Riku let out masculine squeak (because men don't squeak like women, oh _no,_ they don't) and toppled forward and onto Sora.

As for Riku's face? It landed right in Sora's crotch.

The events after this came faster than tickets were sold out for Spider-Man 3. Roxas, going into a sibling-protective overdrive, lunged forward, punching Riku right in the side of the head. The silver-haired teen let out a yelp, tumbling off of Sora. Roxas aimed another hit at Riku which was intercepted by Axel.

In the end, Riku had multiple bruises (both on body and ego, courtesy of Roxas) and a slap-mark on his cheek (courtesy of Sora), and Axel had a few bruises himself and a few pulled muscles (also courtesy of Roxas).

Damage done to Roxas? One bump on the head.

Damage done to Sora? None. (Except for the fact that he practically got groped. Which was an accident by the way. And all totally Axel's fault who blamed it on Roxas.)

Sora now refused to speak to Riku. Roxas wouldn't even look at Axel because the guy had defended the enemy. The brother-crotch-nuzzling enemy!

"So," Yuffie started, rolling her eyes at a twitching Kairi. "What was that part about your plan working?"

x.x.x


	6. o6 : just lose it

-- - - - -- - - - - -- - - --  
**sweet** talk 101

o6 : **just lose it - eminem**

"I just.. I don't understand! How the.. how the fuck did you two manage.. I.. I have never seen anything like that in my life..!"

Axel winced as his sister cleaned the cut right above his eye. Riku sat at the opposite end of the kitchen table looking sulky (and now clean).

After that little 'show' in the mall, Sora and Roxas not only refused to look or speak (not that Roxas wanted to talk anyway) to Riku and Axel, but they had also left the mall, choosing to walk home instead. (And plan their revenge.)

_I hope they get raped,_ Axel thought angrily. What had _he_ done to get attacked my a vicious Roxas?

"I told you so, Kairi," Yuffie sang from the kitchen counter. She swung her legs against the cupboard making Axel and Riku flinch with every _bang. _"Man, I can't believe you two are still alive. I have _never, ever_ seen Roxas like. He looked like he was gonna kill ya!"

"Yeah?" Riku snapped, glaring at pointedly at Axel. "Well, if _someone_ hadn't _**pushed**_ me, we wouldn't be this in this mess!"

"Are you saying it's _my _fault?" Axel growled. "Because it wasn't. It was totally Roxas's fault!"

"Roxas's fault? He didn't do a damn thing!"

"He did too! He was being all emo!"

"So what the fuck does him being emo have anything to do with you pushing me?!"

"I don't know! It just happened, so shut the fuck up you dickhead!"

"It just happened? I think _you_ happened, shitbag!"

"In case you forgot, _bitch_, I tried to protect you from Roxas!"

"Yeah, fucker? Well, it didn't work too well because he beat you up like a fucking rag doll!"

All of a sudden, both boys lunged at each other, clear over the table. Riku grabbed Axel's shoulders and threw him down while the redhead tried to kick him off and bite him at the same time. It ended up with Riku trying to pin Axel with the kitchen table while Axel had his knee in Riku's stomach.

"Guys! Stop!" Kairi shouted, slamming her hand on the table. Yuffie raised her delicate eyebrows and let out a suggestive whistle. Riku and Axel sprang away from each other upon hearing it.

"Just.. just stop fighting okay.. _god,_" Kairi mumbled, rubbing her temples. She could feel a headache coming on.

"Stop fighting? With this preppy fuck.. thing..?"

"_Preppy fuck?!_ Well, excuse me, anorexic emo-"

"I AM NOT ANOREX-"

"**SHUT THE FUCK UP!!**"

Axel and Riku both stilled as did Yuffie, even though the scream wasn't directed at her.

"Instead of screaming at each other," Kairi started through gritted teeth, "Maybe you two should figure out how to apologize to Sora and Roxas."

Riku 'hmph'd and looked away. "I am not doing anything together with that redheaded freak." _I was so close to telling, Sora,_ Riku though miserably. _So.. fucking.. CLOSE!_ "Unless, y'know, it involves me murdering him."

_**Smack!**_

"Ow, fuck, Kairi!" Riku cried, rubbing his now red cheek. The girl could hit.

Kairi paced around the kitchen, rubbing the bridge of her nose. "Okay.. okay. _O_kay. Start from the beginning. What happened."

Axel crossed his arms, wincing when he moved his pulled muscles, and frowned. "Well, Roxas was being the little emo prick that he his, so I just walked away from him and-"

"Bumped into me!"

"Well, gee, maybe you should watch where you fall, cuz, y'know, it _is_ your face and all. Or maybe your face is just pervertedly attracted to people's-"

"Well, _gee_, maybe you should watch who you bump into," Riku hissed, standing and cracking his knuckles.

"Bring it on, you pansy ass."

"Fine, douche bag!"

"This is better than television!" Yuffie piped up from the background.

Let's just say the fight included a lot of profanity that would even make Hades cower in his little hellhole and a lot of hair pulling. Kairi wrinkled her nose in distaste. She'd need to get the vacuum cleaner.

Riku and Axel finally stopped fighting and fell into their chairs, gasping for breath and rubbing their sore heads.

_I wonder how much hair l lost to that bastard,_ Riku thought, narrowing his eyes at Axel.

"Did you get that out of your system?" Kairi asked sweetly.

Riku and Axel nodded, glaring at each other.

"**GOOD, YOU BITCHES, NOW LISTEN TO ME!**"

Both boys jumped in fright and had half a mind to cower under the table.

Kairi took a deep breath to settle herself. "Riku, Sora's been your best friend and now absolutely hates you for violating him. Axel... Roxas hated you from the start. All you guys have to do is win their trust."

Axel snorted. "Why would I want that pipsqueak's trust?" Well, gee. That was a stupid question.

The redhead came upon a spilt-second realization. Trust. That's all he had to get from Roxas before he finally _broke_ him. Ah, but would Roxas's trust be so easy to gain? Oh, what a challenge. Axel cackled internally. Gods, he was worse than his sister sometimes.

"Look, Axel," Kairi said, crossing her arms. "Remember what I said about proving you wrong? Well, _you_ messed up, so now you have to see for yourself that Roxas really is a nice guy."

Axel snorted. _Yeah. I'll see that he's a nice guy. ..So I can shatter him later._

"It's either that or Roxas is gonna hunt down your ass until he kills you and skins you."

"...Yes, ma'am."

x.x.x

Somewhere, in the deep dark depths of the underworld, Sora and Roxas sat, thinking of ways to get back at Riku and Axel. Okay, not the underworld. Their basement. But close enough. ...The little devils.

Sora shuddered, curling up on the couch. "I feel so violated," he said, scrunching his nose. "By my own best friend!"

Roxas pet Sora's side comfortingly.

"I mean, okay, so Axel bumped into him, but Riku could've at least moved his face, y'know?!"

Roxas nodded in agreement. He'd kill Riku for violating his brother. He swore it.

_And I'll kill Axel for defending Riku. I'll kill him in ten different ways. First he goes and makes my life miserable, then he __**defends**__ the guy who violated my brother. I'll-_

"Boys, are you down here?"

Sora and Roxas squinted as their mother flicked on the lights. Simba slinked through Satsuki's legs and padded into the basement, making himself comfortable between Sora and Roxas.

"Yeah, mom," Sora answered, sitting up.

"Dinner will be ready soon, okay? How did today go, anyway?" Satsuki tilted her head in question, leaning against the doorjamb.

"Awful," Sora groaned, crinkling his nose. When he and Roxas had come home, they went straight through the hallway and into the basement, only bothering to tell their mother they were home.

"Roxas didn't get into a fight with that boy, did he?" Satsuki asked, arching an eyebrow. It was obviously from the new bruises that _something_ had happened. And Satsuki was sure it wasn't sexual.

"I was violated, mom! By my own best friend!" Sora wailed, hugging the stuffing out of a throw pillow.

Well then.

Roxas leaned down and picked up a sketchpad and a marker off the floor. He scribbled something in it before holding it up for his mother to see.

Riku did a face plant in Sora's crotch. Axel pushed him.

"Well... then it wouldn't be Riku's fault then..."

"But moooom! You never know! Riku and Axel could be plotting something! You know Axel hates Roxas. And Riku never did like Roxas that much... OH MY GOD, ROXAS. I LOST MY BEST FRIEND BECAUSE OF YOU-"

Roxas promptly smacked Sora in the face and scribbled another message in the sketch pad. He could have just fallen on top of you. Not on your dick.

Sora furrowed his eyebrows. "You're right."

Satsuki rolled her eyes, shaking her head in disbelief. How come she had crazy kids? "Have you two seen Yuffie?"

Kairi.

"Right. Well then. I'll call you when dinner's ready."

Sora and Roxas nodded. Roxas got a glint in his eye and Sora grinned, knowing that look all too well.

x.x.x

**Okay. Now then.**

**I keep getting a feeling that I might be confusing some of you by the way the story is going. So I'll just explain to make myself feel better.**

**Axel is a stereotypical prick. He thinks all the popular bitches are.. well. Popular bitches. He judges a book by its cover, you follow? That's why he hates Roxas. He sees Roxas as just one of 'them.' He's so obsessed with making Roxas's life **_**miserable**_** because Roxas fights back. And Axel's not so used to that cos he's so 'scary and badass.' Right. So he's all like, 'Ooooh, challenge ((glee))'**

**Roxas hates Axel for obvious reasons. Duh. **

**Sora and Riku are best friends. Like, since diapers, kind of friends. So obviously, Riku face-planting into Sora's crotch threw Sora off-kilter and made him think that Riku was a perverted sex fiend. Which he actually is by the way. But that'd just scare Sora off. ...And so it has. **

**Riku doesn't like Roxas just because he doesn't. (Which.. I guess will be explained later in this story. Maybe.) So now Sora is thinking that Riku and Axel are plotting against Roxas, since they both hate him. And Riku is a perverted freak. ((cough))**

**Pretty much, they all just don't understand each other anymore, and no, Kairi is not a slut.**

**I don't know, I'm getting a bit confused myself. I have this horrible tendency of writing something, having no clue what I wrote, and then finally understanding at the end. I also have a tendency of forgetting important details and leaving them out. Yay me. I just hope this story is at least making some sense to you. I'm pretty sure Axel's obsession-thing must seem a bit confusing... Anyway...**

**That's the end of my rant.. It's three twelve in the fucking morning and I'm going to bed.**

**...Make me happy and leave pretty reviews? ((Sorapout))**


	7. o7 : vindicated

-- - - -- - - - -- - -  
**sweet** talk 101

o7 : **vindicated - dashboard confessionals**

Kairi, Axel, and Riku were currently sitting in Kairi's room (since Axel downright refused to let Riku into his own room), trying to come up with ideas on how to approach Sora and Roxas without having something blow up in there faces. Well.. Kairi didn't need to worry about that so much...

"Look you guys. You can't just waltz up to them like everything's okay. Okay?"

Axel and Riku nodded simultaneously.

Kairi twirled a piece of hair around her finger, thinking. "Riku.. I think you'll have an easier time with Sora cos you're friends and all anyways. 'Sides, it was just an accident, _right_?" she hissed, casting a hell-freezing glare at Axel, who squeaked and ducked his head. It was a manly squeak, of course.

"As for _you_," Kairi continued in sickly sweet voice, making Axel shrink in his seat. "You're on your own. I don't want to get involved with any violence."

Riku snickered beside the redhead and Axel jabbed him with his elbow.

The redhead huffed and pushed himself off the floor of Kairi's room. "Tch. Why do I need to get all friendly with him anyway? He's just a pain in the ass."

"Because you keep fighting with him, asshole."

"It's fun."

Kairi began to retort but Axel only shrugged it off, slinking to his room. He wondered why he couldn't stop thinking about what Roxas's taste in music was...

He closed the door to his room to block out the sound of Kairi complaining to Riku and fell into his bed, burying his face in his pillow. Why did the kid always stray into his thoughts? It's not like Axel _liked_ him or anything. Hell would freeze over before he did. The sun would explode before he did. Aliens would land on earth running around and screaming "LET'S JUST BE FRIENDS!" before he did. Because he sure as hell didn't.

Nope. Not at all.

x.x.x

As Kairi, Riku, and Axel spent Sunday trying to figure out ways to get close to Sora and Roxas, another certain blonde was making his way down the sidewalk to see a certain slate-haired teen that he had certainly not seen since last year.

...For certain.

It was a known fact that Zexion rarely showed up to his own parties. Because it was really his older, much well-known brother who hosted them.

Demyx had been hoping to see his (ex)friend at the party.. or, hell, even at school. But Zexion had a different schedule, and pretty much all AP classes. The only time Demyx would have a chance to see Zexion would be at lunch, but the teen was never there anymore. Not even at the library, where he usually preferred to be during lunch.

The blonde bit his lip nervously when Zexion's house came into view. The two had been inseparable all last year until their fight at the end of the year. Demyx blamed himself for it because he knew it was all his fault. And now.. now Zexion wouldn't even look his way.

Demyx gulped, standing on the front porch. He was afraid to see Zexion, but he was anxious, too. He had been fidgety all last week and Larxene had to hit him with a math book just to make him stop. It wasn't pretty.

So, he squared his shoulders, raised his head, and rang the doorbell.

...And nearly shrank when Zexion answered the door.

Zexion narrowed his violet eyes coldly. His hand was on the knob, ready to close the door on Demyx's face. "You."

Demyx gave the other teen a smile, which wasn't really a smile but a plea to not be killed on the spot.

"U-uh.. yeah. Me," Demyx started nervously, rubbing the back of his head. "Haven't.. haven't seen you in a while, Zex."

"I thought I told you I was done with you."

Demyx winced and cut his eyes away. He couldn't look at Zexion...

...He was a coward.

"Heh.. I thought you might've forgiven me by now," Demyx muttered, flicking his shy eyes up to Zexion's. The other didn't respond, only glared at Demyx with a look of such... _hate_, that it made the blonde cringe.

"Z-Zex.. I said I was sorry.."

"Yeah? Sorry doesn't change anything, Demyx. It's just a word. Saying sorry doesn't magically make everything better."

The corners of Demyx's lips turned down slightly as he looked back at Zexion. Had didn't remember him being almost his height.. Zexion had always been shorter..

"Zexion, I tried getting through to you every day all _summer_! But your mom kept telling me that you were out. I've been trying to apologize but you never let me!"

"There's nothing to apologize for. I'm done with you."

"Can't you just listen to me?!" Demyx cried, angry tears pooling in the corners of his eyes. "I said I was sorry, I _know_ I was wrong! Can't you trust me...?"

Zexion scowled and looked away, his bangs shielding his face. "I was always there for you, y'know. All the time. But you never stood up for me. Not once..."

"I know, Zex, but please, just lis-"

_**SLAM**_

Demyx stared at the door in front of him, the words dying in his throat. He wanted to call Zexion back.. He wanted the other to know that he was sorry.. so sorry..

"Z-Zexion.." Demyx whispered, knowing that Zexion probably wasn't listening. "I.. I'm sorry.. I've been trying to tell you that all summer.. I.. I was just scared. I didn't want to lose my friends by fighting with them over you. I-I was heartless and selfish and all those o-other things... But.. b-but I don't care anymore. I can lose every friend I have just as long as _you'll_ be my friend."

Demyx closed his eyes and pressed his forehead against the door. He could almost _feel_ Zexion standing there on the other side.. breathing.. listening..

And so Demyx waited for Zexion to open the door. Waited for Zexion to forgive him. Waited for Zexion to take him back. Waited for everything to be okay.

And he waited..

..and waited..

..and waited..

...and waited.

x.x.x

"He hates me," Demyx said to his younger sister. Naminé flicked her eyes away from her canvas and up at her brother, raising her eyebrows slightly.

"I don't think he _hates _you. He's probably just hurt."

"Like that makes me feel any better."

"Well, do you want the truth, or do you want me to lie to you?"

Demyx huffed, stalking over to Naminé's bed and flopping into it. "I tried to tell him," he muttered, voice muffled by the white blanket, "but he just wouldn't listen.."

"Actions speak louder than words."

"Yeah? Well, what the hell am I supposed to _do_?!" Demyx cried desperately, sitting up sharply. It wasn't so hard to see that the blonde had been crying.

Naminé sighed, leaning closer to her canvas. Pinks and purples and gold's swirled in crazy patterns at the bottom and faded into a navy blue with daubs of white littering the top.

"Look, if you want him to forgive you so badly, you can think of something yourself."

Demyx pouted, his shoulders slumping miserably. "I guess, but-"

"You'll figure it out."

He lowered his eyes and nodded, leaning back and stretching out on Naminé's bed. Something inside his chest cavity was twisting painfully, crushed between his ribs. It had been doing that all summer. "Yeah.. I will."

x.x.x


	8. o8 : intermission

**IMPORTANT AUTHORS NOTE.**

**I just got so fed up with my typos and mistakes that I went back and fixed them. Some of which are important to the story. You can go back and reread if you want to but you don't have to. Mostly, Roxas doesn't say a word in any chapter, so he's actually MUTE. **

**I just figured that I'd have to do it sooner or later. I'm such an awful writer. I start writing a fanfic and then when I get into it, I want to go back and change everything :( I really need to learn how to plan these things out. Anyway. I hope this doesn't throw all you guys off.**

**Plus, I'm sorry that this chapter is so short. I'm just tired and stressed from school and I wanted to get it over with. Like.. seriously. I wish I could find more time to write :(**

-- - -- -- -- - -- -  
**sweet** talk 101

o8 : **intermission - panic! at the disco**

The sun was too bright while the air was too cool. Roxas rolled over in the grass, pulling the hood of his sweatshirt over his eyes. All around him kids walked and chatted with each other, waiting for the school doors to open.

It was somewhat strange, how all the voices seemed to rise into a mismatched harmony. It was like people were afraid of the silence, so they filled it up with the only thing they could - their voices. Sometimes, it was awful to listen to. The voices would make fun of each other, accuse each other, scream like broken violins. But sometimes, they were kind, soft voices, the ones that lulled you into sleep.

Roxas listened to all those voices. His own voice was weak, on the edge of breaking out, yet cracking at the last moment only to retreat again. In his mind, the words came easily to him, flowed freely. But from his mouth, they were nothing but an empty breath of air. Roxas envied them. No matter how mismatched they were, at least they still had their voices.

Roxas glanced back down at his iPod before feeling something jab into his side. He groaned, squirming away.

"Wake up sleepy head," Sora's voice sang out sweetly, right into Roxas's ear.

Roxas squirmed again and let out an annoyed breath of air.

"Yes, you have to."

The blonde boy remained still

"Get. _Up._" Sora reached over, poking Roxas in the side. Said blonde tried to scoot away from the offending digit. "C'mon, man! It's only Monday!"

Roxas smacked Sora's hand away and gave and exhasperated sigh, staring up at the sky as though wishing it would take him someplace far away from here.

_Monday and I already wish it was friday,_ Roxas thought, still looking up desperately at the sky.

"Aw, boo, you're such a killjoy," Sora said, as though reading Roxas's mind. He was actually getting pretty good at that.

Roxas rolled his eyes and pushed himself off the ground. He brushed the grass off his pants and threw his bag over his shoulders. Sora smiled, following his twin inside the school building.

"Did you talk to Hayner, Pence and Olette?"

Roxas flicked his eyes towards Sora and nodded.

"Online."

Roxas gave Sora a look that said "duh, stupid."

Sora laughed, lifting his hands up innocently. "Are they okay over there without you?"

Roxas smiled and shrugged lightly.

They headed towards Sora's locker first because it was closer. Roxas took down the small whiteboard and marker that hung on the door while Sora got all his books.

Did you hear from Riku or Kairi yesterday?

"Nah. Kairi didn't call or anything. And.. Riku's just.." Sora trailed off, as though in a daze and then shrugged.

Roxas frowned at the small whiteboard and then set back against the metal door. His eyes suddenly widened when he saw who was walking down the hall. He grabbed Sora's shoulders and whirled him around.

Sora blinked and then groaned. "Aww, no!"

Axel and Riku were coming there way. Shit.

"Quick, run!" Sora grabbed Roxas's hand and practically dragged him down the hall.

"..See? I told you they would run," Riku told Axel, scowling after the twins.

Axel scoffed, rolling his eyes. "Then we'll just have to run after them, moron."

"You do know that since they're together, they can probably punch our lights out?"

"Then let's spilt 'em up. You go this way, I'll go that way."

The first floor went around in a square, so Riku bolted off in one directed while Axel went the opposite way. Just as Axel had suspected, they cornered the two boys in the middle of the next hallway. Roxas was all too happy to give Axel the finger.

"Christ, you guys," Axel grumbled. "We just wanted to talk to you two, okay? No need to run."

Sora and Roxas exchanged similar glances. Roxas suddenly shoved Sora in Riku's direction. The brunette sprinted past Riku and down the stairs while Roxas literally jumped through Axel's legs and went the other way around.

"You're joking," Riku groaned.

"Here, you go corner Sora and I'll go corner Roxas."

Riku made a face but did as he was told (for once). Axel, meanwhile, sprinted off after Roxas. Being the one with extremely long legs, he easily caught up to the blonde and cornered him against hte library door. It was a good thing that no one was there yet.

"Will you calm the fuck _down_?" Axel hissed, bracing his hands on either side of Roxas's head. The blonde stared back coldly, looking like he wanted nothing more than to kick Axel where it hurt. but he didn't. He edged back against the wall as much as he could.

Axel sighed and shook his head. "Look kid. I just want to tell you something."

x.x.x

**CLIFFHANGER OF DOOM D: **

**REVIEW D: NO REVIEWS MAKE ME EMO AND NOT WANT TO WRITE D: SO PUSH THE SHINY PURPLE BUTTON D:**

**NOW I'M GOING TO FREAKING BED BEFORE I FALL ASLEEP ON MY KEYBOARD. EW. WHY AM I USING CAPS?!**


	9. o9 : ldn

**EDITED 4.6.08.**** Um. dumbest mistake ever. I feel so stupid that it's not even funny. Okay, before, when I had this file up, it had said that Roxas was to get a surgery for his voice in about two months. WHERE THE HELL I HAD GOTTEN THAT FROM, I'VE NO IDEA. It's supposed to be sometime next summer-ish. GOD. I'm an idiot.**

- -- - -- -- -- - -- -  
**sweet** talk 101

o9 : **LDN - lily allen**

_"Look kid. I just want to tell you something."_

Roxas kept on glaring through his blonde bangs, blue, blue eyes cold. His body language showed that he couldn't give a shit about what Axel wanted to tell him.

"Stop _looking_ at me that way, will you?" _Before I scratch those pretty blue eyes of yours out._ "Christ.."

Axel reached up to run a hand through his mane of red hair and Roxas chose that moment to run. Axel was expecting this, of course, so flung his arms out and around Roxas's waist, toppling them both to the floor with a dull thud. Roxas panted beneath Axel, trying to squirm out of his grip.

"Okay, seriously. Stop," Axel said, not loosening his grip. "I'm not gonna kill you or anything. I swear. Scout's honor." _...Actually, I almost set the scouts on fire once.. Never mind.._

Roxas let out a deep and shaky breath, trying to convey how much he was annoyed. Axel blinked down and realized that he was still crushing the poor boy against the floor. Roxas shoved him away the moment Axel lifted himself up and scrambled to his feet.

"You don't have to go all ninja on me, kid," Axel said, running a hand through his red spikes. "All I wanted was to ask if you wanted to go do something after school. See? Safe." He held up his hands, showing that he was harmless. As if he really had a weapon hidden somewhere up his sleeve. If so, Roxas secretly hoped Axel got stabbed with it. Then again, Roxas wished a number of awful things upon Axel. ..And his health. But you don't see a piano dropping from the sky, now do you?

"...Well?"

Roxas arched a skeptical eyebrow at Axel and crossed his arms.

"C'mon, seriously. Or else Kairi won't stop bitching at me."

Roxas lifted his chin and promptly slapped Axel, walking away in a huff.

"Little.. fucker.." Axel hissed, holding his hand against his cheek. A large red mark slowly blossomed against his skin. He stood there for a moment before sprinting off after the blonde. He grabbed the boy's arm forcefully and whirled him around. Roxas looked up at him with surprised eyes, hopelessly trying to free his arm.

He wished he could scream like a broken violin.

...Break some sound barriers... Axel's eardrums. That'd be nice.

"Calm down, okay? Calm down," Axel muttered. He let go of Roxas's arm, his other hand still rubbing absently at his cheek. Damn, the kid could _hit_. Roxas crossed his arms tightly across his chest, cheeks flushed in frustration.

Axel straightened up slowly and slid his hands into his pockets. The first warning bell rang and kids half-heartedly trailed off to their first class.

"Okay, I'll admit it, this is mostly to save my own ass from Kairi, not because I want to. And quite honestly, I think we can both just ignore each other perfectly well, right?"

Roxas nodded, glaring at some spot above Axel's shoulder.

_Why do you hate me?_ he wanted to say. _What sparked it? Because of who I am and then people I know and who I hang out with?_

Axel sighed as though he had been waiting for Roxas to say something before remembering he couldn't speak. He rubbed the back of his neck awkwardly. "Okay.. you know.. the first bell is going to ring in a few anyway, so can we talk about this later? Like, after school? Christ, I don't know." The redhead made an aggravated sound in his throat and passed a hand over his face. Roxas raised his eyebrows in surprise. It was like Axel was fighting with himself. Like he couldn't decide on how to act towards this new, blonde-haired, blue-eyed...

... mute kid.

How do you talk to someone who can't even speak?

Roxas waited until Axel's attention was back on him and then shrugged, lifting a hand to run it through his hair.

"So we can talk? After school, right?"

Roxas shrugged again. _Talk? Sure. Let's __**talk.**_

"Or.. y'know.. I'll do the talking and shit.. and.." Axel trailed off awkwardly and sighed. Why was it that only now he realized how strange it was to talk to a mute kid?

Roxas rolled those blueblueblue eyes of his and swung his bag off his shoulder, pulling out a pen. He grabbed Axel's hand, palm up, and wrote

Fine then. I'll meet you out front after the last bell.

Axel held up his hand and read the message slowly as though trying to find a hidden meaning. _What would you really say to me? _"Sounds good."

x.x.x

"What do you want?" Sora snapped, tilting his head up in a very Roxas-like fashion. Riku almost got the shivers.

"Aw, c'mon, So. You have to be over it by now, right?"

"Um.. no?"

"Look, I said I was sorry, it was an accident. Now you're just being stupid about it."

"You're calling me _stupid_?!"

"No! I'm just saying you're acting like a brat about something I didn't mean to do!"

Sora huffed and stubbornly crossed his arms, his cheeks a light pink--

...Wait. Was he _blushing_...?

Riku blinked in surprise and fell silent for a few moments, just staring at Sora. Who was blushing. Which either meant he was embarrassed, mad, a combination of the two, or something else... Being mad and embarrassed was natural, but not for such a long period of time. That was just weird.

"What?" the Sora snapped, glaring up at the silverette. "Take a picture, it'll last longer."

Yep. He was totally blushing. So maybe...

Riku arched an eyebrow, a slow smirk spreading across his face. "Sure, I can never get enough of you."

Sora half roared, half growled in frustration. "I can sure as hell get enough of _you_."

He didn't know what made him say that, why he suddenly got so pissy. Maybe it was because of the giddy, butterfly-feeling in his stomach. Or the hot blush in his cheeks. Whatever it was, he simply stomped his foot in annoyance and marched away. Riku didn't follow him.

He knew _much_ better than that.

x.x.x

"Well.. you guys sure are a lively bunch today," Larxene muttered sarcastically, looking between Demyx, who was resting his chin on the table, eyes lidded and sad, to Axel, who was picking at his food and was quiet for once.

"I set Kairi's skirt on fire in chem lab today," Larxene said after a moment, watching Axel. The redhead shrugged, stabbing at pea repeatedly with his fork. ...The poor little vegetable.

Larxene knitted her eyebrows together in irritation and crossed her arms. This was not something that she was used to. What she was used to was people listening to her, attention on her. Hell, Axel and Demyx could've at least pretended they were listening.

"Okay, what the _fuck _is wrong with you two? When'd you convert to emo-ism?"

"When Zexion decided to hate me," Demyx moaned pitifully, burying his face in his arms.

"When fate shoved Roxas in my face." Stab. Stab. Stabstabstabst-

Axel blinked and held up the remaining half of his plastic fork, the other having broken off and getting stuck in the styrofoam tray.

"... You two have serious issues."

"But he hates me, Larx!" Demyx cried, whipping his head up. "I can't talk with him, no matter what I try..."

"Hell, I wouldn't want to talk with you either, for being so mopey."

"There's a reason I'm mopey, christ!"

"Well, you were kind of a bitch to him, Demyx," Axel spoke up, taking to drawing shapes in the tray with his broken fork.

"How was I a bitch to him? You know I'm not a mean person," Demyx mumbled, frowning a bit. It was true... He was happy, he never picked on anyone-okay, maybe when he was little, but that doesn't count. But he was generally a good person..

Axel shrugged, pushing his tray away with a disgusted look on his face. He couldn't stand to look at that food anymore. "It's not so much of what you did.. it's more of what you didn't do."

"As if that tells me anything."

"Okay, well, let's look at it this way. Zexion would always hang out with you because he had no one else to hang out with, right? And whenever he gave you problems just by simply being there, you would shy away. Like when some assholes were making fun of you for hanging out with him." Axel cocked an eyebrow and nodded at the look Demyx gave him. "I'm not saying that there's anything wrong with him. But they thought so. Don't you remember? How you ignored him for a couple of days before talking to him again? You did that every time something like that happened."

Demyx frowned, his eyes falling to the table. He tried to think back to all those times, all throughout last year..

"Did.. did I really do that to him..?"

"You were his friend, Demyx. Do you remember that? Remember when your 'buddies' from the swim team got to him? You didn't do a damn thing about it either."

Axel trailed off and shrugged, turning back to picking at his food. Demyx, who was still trying to cope with himself and what had happened, got up from his seat and silently walked back towards the school building.

"Wow, what drama." Larxene sighed and rested her chin in her hands.

x.x.x

Axel wasn't looking forward to this. Not really, at least. It'd be much easier if they put this in the past and never speak to each other again. He just.. just..

"I just dug myself into a hole twelve feet deep and I just keep on fuckin' going.." Axel laughed bitterly and shook his head when something caught the corner of his eye. He jumped away in surprise, but then realized it was only Roxas. The blonde smirked and nodded.

_Yep. Deeper and deeper and deeper... God, that sounds wrong. Glad I didn't say that aloud._

"Oh. You."

Roxas rolled his eyes and pushed away from the wall Axel had been leaning on, walking down the front steps of the school.

_So.. it's _you_ now? Not _preppy fuck_?_

Axel frowned and huffed, sidestepping the people clustered around the front of the school to follow the blonde. Roxas didn't even seem to be waiting for Axel, he just let the redhead follow him until they reached the quieter, far end of the campus.

"All right, so, how do you plan on talking?" Axel asked, actually curious as to how this conversation was going to go. Roxas shrugged with a strange little smile and dropped down into the grass, stretching out.

Axel frowned slightly, looking down at the blonde's spiky head. He glanced around, as though suspecting that someone was watching them and then took a seat beside Roxas.

"So.. like.. really, isn't it weird not being able to talk?"

Roxas shrugged, not really being able to do much else.

Axel's frown dipped even lower. "Okay.. there's got to be an easier way to do this. Do you have a piece of paper or something? Cell phone?"

Roxas cocked an eyebrow before a look of realization dawned on his face. He reached into his bag, pulling his Sidekick out of one of the pockets. He typed something in quickly and handed it to Axel.

**Well, obviously it's weird. Everyone around me can speak freely and I'm like the only one who can't.**

"Heh.. yeah.. that's gotta suck." Axel made a face and handed the cell phone back. "Can't imagine what that's gotta be like."

Roxas smiled, holding his phone up to Axel's face.

**You're pretty tame today.**

"...You won't believe how hard I'm trying, kid."

**Why?**

"Why?" Axel echoed, frowning. "I don't know. I guess I don't like people like you."

**And what are people like me like?**

"Or.. y'know. The people that you're around with irk me too."

**Then why are you talking to me?**

Axel shrugged and looked around. There were only a few stragglers left on the school grounds, mostly goofing around or waiting for their other friends. He reached into his bag, pulled out a cigarette and lit it before speaking.

"I guess I was just curious." It was partly true. The other part was just plain cruelty. There was still a part of him, somewhere in the back of his head that egged him on, told him to get close to the blonde... and then rip off his wings. Just to see if he could. Just to see how breakable this boy was. Axel didn't understand what was going on inside his head, but he did it anyway.

Roxas smiled slightly, fingers flying across the phone's small keyboard.

**Just because I'm different than you, and the people you hang out with and I hang out with are different, doesn't mean that I'm any worse than you.**

Axel frowned at the screen, a voice in the back of his head repeating over and over, _'Break him, break him, and those pretty blue eyes..'_

"Doesn't mean I'm supposed to like you."

Roxas breathed out a sigh and let the phone fall to his chest

"...How'd it happen?"

The blonde blinked in confusion, and then lifted his head, raising an eyebrow at Axel.

_How'd what happen?_

"I mean.. your.. your voice. How'd you lose your voice?"

Roxas stared at Axel for a long moment and let out another breathy sigh, tilting his head back into the grass. He lay still for a short while before picking up his Sidekick and tapping away.

Axel waited patiently for a little bit, as Roxas seemed to mess up quite a few times in whatever he was doing, but quickly got bored. He looked away from the blonde and swept his eyes across the campus, green gaze catching blooming flowers and fluttering leaves, breathing in the warm scent of the air--

Taptap.

The redhead snapped back to reality with a start, dropping his eyes back to Roxas who was holding the phone out to him.

**It was almost two years ago. I got into a car accident. It was me and my dad, he was bringing back home from guitar practice. Someone swung into our lane and we crashed. I don't remember much then... but when I woke up in the hospital there was a stinging in the side of my neck and my dad was dead.**

"Oh.. I'm sorry," Axel mumbled, eyebrows furrowing slightly. He didn't know what else he could offer to say.

Roxas shrugged lightly and stared up at the sky, all sorts of emotions swirling in those deep blue eyes of his.

_I don't remember much._

He tapped Axel's knee to catch his attention, and when he had it, he pushed up hair near the nape of his neck to show a long white scar.

Axel whistled, quirking his eyebrows. He was half impressed, half disturbed.. give or take a few other strange emotions.

"So.. you're going to be mute forever?"

**No, actually. I'm supposed to have surgery somewhere around next summer.**

Axel tilted his head, staring at the white screen silently for a long moment, and all of a sudden all these thoughts flooded his head... like what if it didn't work? Was he going to need speech therapy after not talking for so long? What if they damaged something important in the process?

_'Break him, break him..'_

He closed his eyes and thought for a long moment, trying to pick a question, waiting for the right one.

"...Do you miss your dad?"

The blonde gave Axel a surprised look and slowly turned his gaze back up to the sky. A small smile lifted the corners of his lips.

_Yeah. I do._

x.x.x

"So.. later, I guess.." Axel said, feeling slightly awkward as he watching Roxas walk away.

Well. _That_ entire thing had been unexpected. Though, he had noticed that as long as he had kept himself under control, Roxas did too. Whenever they fought before, Roxas was ready, fangs bared and claws out. But.. during that talk, he was almost.. sweet. For lack of a better word.

Axel grimaced and turned the other way to walk home as the turmoil in his head raged on. There was a tiny part of him that almost didn't mind the blonde anymore, but it was overwhelmed by the second voice in his head-

_'Hypocrite, you hated him at the beginning. You can't just like him now, hypocritehypocritehypocrite--'_

"That wasn't me, that was you," Axel grumbled to himself, gingerly massaging the bridge of his nose.

The kid wasn't really all that bad-

Words like slut and whore and bitch filtered into his head and Axel stopped walking for a moment, wondering why he was like this, why it had to be him?

And most of all, why was it because of Roxas?

x.x.x

**shugo: Axel is a little... schizo...**

**...If you hadn't noticed.**

**Other than that, I'm so glad I finally updated. I've been having.. a hard time with this chapter XD; it didn't want to cooperate. In other news.. um.. i went to anime boston last week and bought a roxas figurine (he's so cute!) and today is my birthday 8D the end.**

**hopefully the next chapter will come out just a little faster. thanks so much for bearing with me. ((heart)) review? :3**

**3.30.08**


	10. 1o : papercut

**Ohhhhh dear god above I finally finished this chapter and I'm so sorry it took so long but it's a little thing called life and I hope that after all this time wasted on waiting you people still want to read this random piece of shit because I feel like my writing has gotten worse.**

**...so thank you all. Really.**

**So prepare yourselves for some lol's (maybe), angsty goodness, and the boys finally growing a pair and setting aside all their differences... ((plays violin)) Well... not all the boys.**

-- - -- - - -- - -- - -  
**sweet **talk 101

1o : **papercut - linkin park**

When Roxas returned that evening, he was instantly jumped on by his younger sister. She clung to his back with a gleeful grin and Roxas was forced to drop his bag by the door so that he could hook his arms under Yuffie's legs.

"Awesome, you're just in time for dinner."

Roxas tilted his head up curiously and sniffed at the air, mouth instantly watering. The smell of garlic and butter in the pan always made him hungrier than usual. He shifted Yuffie on his back so that it was easier to hold her and piggybacked her into the kitchen were Sora was busy setting up the table and Satsuki was cooking something up at the stove. Hopefully, it was going to be edible.

Satsuki brushed her strawberry blonde hair back with her free hand and looked over her shoulder at her blonde son. "Hey, baby. Nothing bad, right?"

Roxas smiled and shook his head, knowing that she meant to ask him if he stayed late because he got in trouble. Good thing she knew him well enough, because she didn't bombard him with anymore questions. ...Thankfully, there was Sora... his own personal translator.

"Y'know, I coulda sworn I saw you and Axel together after school."

Roxas nodded and set Yuffie down on a chair. _We talked_, he mouthed.

"Talked? As in, civilly?" Sora gasped, eyes widening in mock shock.

The blonde grinned and took a seat next to his twin. _Yeah._

"Seriously? That's almost creepy. You'd at least think he'd like.. try to trick you or something, right?" Sora grinned back and winked, leaning back in his chair. Roxas only smiled and rolled his eyes.

_It wasn't too bad._

x.x.x

**why am i so up**_**tight**_** today?**

When Axel came home that evening, he wanted nothing more than to drown in his bed. He was both mentally and physically exhausted, and a dark room with warm blankets sounded like the most inviting thing in the world.

"Hi, Axel," Kairi called from the couch. She stretched out and tilted her head over the armrest so that she could look into the hallway. Axel barely spared her a glance, much less a response, as he slunk upstairs. "Um... okay. Nice talk, Axel. We should do it again sometime."

The petite redhead huffed in annoyance and slid farther down in her seat. Axel wasn't being a very good companion lately.

...And neither was the TV.

After chucking his stuff into his room, Axel immediately went to the bathroom for a shower. He turned the tap for the hot water and slipped out of his clothes while waiting for the water to heat up. Even the rising temperature offered no comfort. Axel sighed tiredly and ran his fingers through his mane of red hair, turning to the mirror. The person in the reflection was hardly anyone he recognized. Pale skin, dark circles beneath his eyes... He frowned and put a hand against the surface, half expecting his reflection to move on its own accord. He quickly shook those thoughts away and clambered in to the shower.

What was he going to do? This was getting to be slightly insane. Insane in the literal term. Who could he tell? Mom and dad were practically never home. Not that they didn't want to be home, but they were always away on business trips and such. The money had to come in somehow.

Axel groaned and tilted his head against the wall. The feeling of the cold linoleum plus the hot water running down his skin made him shiver.

...Could he talk to Kairi?

"You have to remember," Axel mumbled to himself, closing his eyes, "it's not like she's your little sister or anything. She's your twin. Your equal. You can talk to her, right..?"

He could.. he could.. He could at least try.

After stepping out of the shower and a drying himself off with one of the fluffy white towels, Axel trudged into his room. He threw on a pair of sweatpants and then paced around his room a bit, trying to figure out what to do. Nothing came. He was... scared...? Axel sighed shakily and passed his hands over his face, slumping down on his bed.

What could he possibly say to her? _"Hey, Kairi, guess what? I think I'm crazy."_ No... that couldn't work.

...Roxas had it easy. He didn't have to say a word.

Light suddenly spilled across the floor from the doorway. Axel blinked and lifted his gaze, seeing Kairi's outline leaning against the doorjamb.

"Hey.. Axel, you okay?" she asked, tilting her head. Her expression was hidden in the shadows.

Axel stared at her for a long moment, wondering if he should run away or seek her help. "I don't know," he finally mumbled, letting his gaze fall to the floor.

Kairi shifted away from the doorjamb, blinking in surprise. She had expected her brother to snap at her, or at least offer something sarcastic. She let out a sigh, expression softening. "Did something happen?" she asked, going over to sit by the other redhead. Axel bit his lower lip and raked his fingers through his hair, trying to think of something to say. From the corner of his eye, he could see Kairi watching him with concern.

"I think there's something wrong with me," he finally said, voice leaving him in a breath of air.

Kairi's eyebrows shot up, confusion crossing her features. "What do you mean by wrong...?"

"Wrong. Wrong in here." Axel glanced at Kairi and tapped a finger against his temple.

She frowned at him and shook her head in even greater confusion. "I don't... get what you're trying to say, Ax."

Axel took a deep breath, massaging his temples with his fingers. "A voice," he said, his own voice weak and breaking. "There's a fucking voice in my head."

"...No, really, Axel, what's wrong?" Kairi demanded, crossing her arms impatiently over her chest.

"I'm being serious," Axel muttered, narrowing his eyes at his sister.

"A _voice._ In your _head._"

**it's **_**there**_** right beneath my **_**skin.**_

"I swear to you, Kairi, I'm not kidding."

Kairi gave Axel a skeptical look and then cast her eyes away. She bit her thumbnail, staring pensively at the floor. "I... god, Axel..."

"Seriously, Kai, I don't know what to _do_."

Kairi took in a deep breath and lowered her hand, her fingers tapping nervously at her thigh. _He_ didn't know what to do? How could _she_ possibly know any better?

"Kairi, please..."

Kairi flicked her eyes up, attention caught by the... _fearanddesperation_ in her brother's voice. Of course he'd be freaked out. Of course he was desperate. He was hearing _voices in his head._

The longer Kairi remained silent the more nervous Axel got. He bit his bottom lip and fisted his hands against his knees, blunt nails cutting into his palms.

"Shit, Kai, what's happening to me? What _going_ to happen to me? I don't want to... to be sent away to some mental hospital or something!"

The smaller redhead quickly shook her head and held up her hand, signaling Axel to stop talking.

"Stop... stop freaking out, okay?" _Even though I'm freaking out just as much as you are-_ "Just..." Kairi swallowed down a lump in her throat and rubbed the bridge of her nose. It was unsettling. She had never see Axel truely afraid of something before. "...Just get some rest for now, okay? Tomorrow... I'll call our doctor, see if she can suggest something, alright? So... so don't freak out. You're not going to be sent to a mental hospital. You're gonna be okay, you hear?"

Axel nodded shakily and fell back into his bed, curling up on his side. Even if he wouldn't admit it, Kairi could tell he was scared out of his mind.

She smiled sadly and scooted closer, putting her hand on Axel's bare shoulder. He instantly turned around and pulled her down into the bed. Both arms went around her waist and his face was buried in her neck.

"You'll be okay," Kairi crooned, reaching up with one hand to run her fingers through Axel's hair. "Promise."

x.x.x

Two quiet weeks had passed after Axel had told Kairi about what was wrong with him. The days were slowly slipping by into October, but the weather in this little town seemed to show no signs of getting colder. Even the trees were still exploding with green leaves, teeming with life, and cicadas still sang their hypnotizing drone in the shade. Riku was still trying to coax feelings out of a stubborn Sora, Demyx was still trying to make up with an even more stubborn Zexion, Larxene was wondering why Axel started looking so tired lately, and Kairi was busy trying to cover it all up...

He started seeing a doctor, Aeris Gainsborough, two weeks ago.

Two quiet weeks had passed.

Roxas barely saw Axel anymore. Even Axel's own friends had come up to him a few days ago, wondering about the redhead. Not that Axel had been skipping school. He was there, always, but almost as though there was a wall between him and the rest of the world. Almost like a shield. Almost like he was invisible.

But Roxas wasn't thinking about Axel today. Because today he had a reason to momentarily forget him. Hayner, Olette and Rikku were visiting from his old school during lunch and the blonde was too busy looking out over campus to even bother eating his food.

"God, Roxas. You're acting as though they're just going to walk right by you," Sora mumbled, poking Roxas's cheek with his pencil. His math homework lay forgotten on his lap. Roxas shot Sora a look and gave him a swift kick to the shin from under the table.

"Damn, that was _my_ leg!" Kairi snapped angrily, pulling her legs up onto the bench. Roxas grinned sheepishly and snatched Sora's pencil, quickly scribbling **Sorry** on a nearby napkin. Kairi rolled her eyes despite the smile that lifted the corners of her lips.

**So what's up with Axel?**

Kairi blinked and pursed her lips, cocking her head to the side. "Are you kidding? I've been _telling_ everyone that he's sick."

**Is he?**

"Yeeaah.. He's, um... He's getting a little better, but, y'know, still feels like crap and all-"

"Roxas, look! They're here!"

The blonde's face instantly lit up, Axel forgotten once more, and he jumped out of his seat taking off at a sprint across campus. Kairi watched with a questioning look as the white and blue uniformed trio approached Roxas, instantly jumping all over him.

"So... they're from Roxas's old school, right?" Kairi asked, turning towards Sora. The brunette nodded, smiling after his brother.

"Yep. Best friends."

"But... if they were with him why did he transfer here?"

Sora's smile saddened slightly and he cast his eyes downward. "Mom thought it would be best. Since I'm the only one who can really understand him... since he's mute now and all, y'know?"

Kairi hummed thoughtfully, turning her gaze back to Roxas. "...Yeah. I think I get it."

x.x.x

Rikku grinned brightly and slung her arm around Roxas's shoulders. "Hey little dude, you won't believe who we found in the music room last week."

Roxas blinked and furrowing his eyebrows in thought, trying to remember what he had forgotten.

"Stupid," Hayner drawled, rolling his eyes. He pulled the black strap off his shoulder, pushing a guitar case into Roxas's hands. The blonde's face lit up like fireworks and he hugged the case to his chest, grinning like mad. He used to play the guitar back at the Academy and apparently had left his white-red-and-black acoustic in the music room. Poor Spencer must've gotten dusty and lonely...

...Yes he named his guitars and didn't have a problem with it.

...Then he kicked Hayner in the shin.

The dirty-blonde stumbled back, wincing, and threw Roxas a glare. "What the hell was that for?!"

Roxas smirked smugly and clicked his tongue ring against his teeth. _Not stupid._

Hayner grumbled and swore under his breath, watching Roxas carefully out of the corner of his eye. Olette chuckled and shook her head. Honestly. Two teenagers that acted like complete... She wanted to say kids... but only the word douchebags came to mind.

"Anyway!" she piped up, rocking back on her heels. "We oughta go. Our lunch is almost over. But it was great to see you Rox!"

"Yeah, we'll keep in touch," Rikku said, drawing her arm away from Roxas's shoulders. "Keep us updated."

Roxas smiled and mouthed a silent thanks, nodding down at his guitar. With a final exchange of grins and hugs, Olette, Hayner and Rikku began their way back towards the Academy. Roxas watched them with a sad smile until they disappeared from his view. He sighed and ambled back to his lunch table where Sora and Kairi were waiting.

x.x.x

Roxas finally saw Axel at the end of the day when he was walking out of school. The redhead was standing by the school gates, smoking a cigarette, and Kairi was right next to him, saying things that Roxas was sure Axel didn't care about. In fact, he looked like he was ready to drop and sleep right in the middle of the road. Of course... the dark circles and limp posture showed it all. Roxas continued to watch curiously as Kairi patted Axel on the shoulder and walked off towards the parking lot. Axel didn't do anything except for yawn, snuff out his cigarette, and pull out another one.

It had been some time since Axel had bothered Roxas. Or even talked to him. He didn't trip him in the hallway or throw weird chemical concoctions at him in class anymore. So Roxas pulled out his Sidekick and walked over. Axel looked pretty surprised when Roxas suddenly appeared out of nowhere, shoving his phone into the taller's face.

**Wanna hang out tonight?**

Axel stared at the screen with a raised eyebrow making Roxas release an impatient breath.

_Roxas? Tonight? Hang out...?_ Axel blinked in confusion, a frown tugging at the corners of his lips. The medication slowed him down, turned his thoughts inside out. It took him a moment to figure out what was written on the little screen.

"Uhh, I.. don't know, Roxas. I'm kinda tired.."

But Roxas beat him to it, shoving his phone back at Axel again.

**Great. I'll pick you up at 9:30.**

Roxas snapped his Sidekick shut and gave Axel a bright grin. The redhead could only blink incredulously in return, just a little stunned. Seriously. What the hell just happened? On second thought, how _did_ it happen? Axel had been having great fun picking on Roxas and then getting on with the rest of his day. Then again... Roxas was also the reason the voice had really started getting serious in the first place. So hanging out with the kid would be out of the question... On third thought, if there was such a thing, Axel kinda-sorta-maybe wanted to hang out with Roxas, way, way in the back of his head. And the meds seemed to be working, so there wasn't much to worry about... right?

"I... guess so," Axel mumbled finally, rubbing the back of his neck awkwardly. It was made even more awkward when Roxas simply left after. Axel had _no_ idea what to expect from the kid later that day.

x.x.x

"You're going out with Roxas? What? Why didn't you tell me?" Kairi demanded, standing with her hands on her hips in Axel's room.

"What are you, my mother?" Axel snapped, sitting up on his bed. He didn't want to snap at Kairi, but the medication just made him tired and cranky and he couldn't help it. "He came up to me after you left and when I came home, you were on the phone talking to Selphie about girly things that I really, quite honestly don't want to know about."

Kairi rolled her eyes and waved her hand dismissively. "So where are you two going?"

"I... have no idea. He just told me that he'd pick me up at nine thirty."

"He'll pick you up? I guess you're the girl in this relationship, huh?"

"THERE-IS-NO-RELATIONSHIP-GOAWAYKAIRI!"

Kairi burst out laughing and ducked out of the room, narrowly avoiding a flying, projectile-like pillow. Axel frowned and settled back into his bed, reaching for his phone. It was 9:23 so... Roxas would probably be there soon. He wondered why Roxas wanted to hang out with him in the first place, especially after all the hell he put the kid through. But he found it best not to ponder about it, since his head was already working two sides of psycho street.

"Might as well go and wait downstairs," Axel mumbled to himself, standing up and making his way out his door, still in the same skinny jeans and green t-shirt that he was in after school. A few minutes later, a car horn beeped outside, signaling that Roxas was waiting. Axel grabbed his keys and cell off the coffee table and waved to Kairi, who was too engrossed in Everybody Loves Raymond to notice.

"..Shit," Axel muttered when he saw the yellow and black Camaro idling in his driveway. He pulled the passenger door open and plopped down in the seat. "God, kid, how'd you afford this?"

Roxas typed something into his Sidekick and chucked it into Axel's lap before moving the gear shift to reverse and backing out of the driveway.

**Rich aunt. Forgot my 16th bday and sent me this. And don't call me kid.**

Axel smirked slightly at the last bit and dropped the Sidekick back into the blonde's lap. "I think I can call you whatever I want considering the fact that you never even told me where we're going."

Roxas turned to Axel and grinned. _You'll see._

x.x.x

Axel frowned in confusion when he noticed that Roxas was driving away from the city. And there wasn't much outside the city except for plains and plains of grass... until you hit the next city, of course.

"Okay, why are you heading towards the outskirts?"

Roxas shrugged lightly, not taking his eyes off the road.

"Because if you plan on killing me out there with a hammer and then dumping my body in a ditch that you dug only a few hours ago, I'm jumping out of this car right now."

That only made Roxas smile with amusement.

"And now you're thinking that I'm a paranoid bitch, I _know_ it. I don't need-hey, we stopped."

_No shit, genius._

Roxas had driven the car off the road and parked it in the grassy area that stretched on for miles. Axel unbuckled his seat belt and looked around as Roxas stepped outside and motioned for Axel to follow him. The redhead frowned a bit and opened the door, swinging his long legs out. "What are we here for?" he asked, pushing himself out of the seat. Roxas grinned back at him and hopped up to sit on the hood of his car. He patted the spot beside him, telling Axel to come sit. Axel stuffed his hands into his pockets and complied, going over to Roxas and leaning against the warm hood of the Camaro.

"So uh... what d'you want?" Axel asked, leaning closer to Roxas when the younger teen pulled out his Sidekick.

**I wanted to talk.**

Axel let out a surprised bark of laughter. "S-so.. so you drove me all the way out here? Just to _talk_?"

**It's easier for me, when it's quiet and when there's no distractions.** Roxas breathed out a silent laugh, smiling shyly.

"...It's hard for you, isn't it?" Axel wondered quietly, truely curious this time. There was nothing to distract him this time either, no voice in the back of his head telling him how worthless, how hopeless he was, how perfectly _useable_ Roxas was.

**Yeah. It is, I guess. But enough about me. What about you? Kairi told me you were sick.**

"Sick? What? Oh! Right, right.. Yeah, I have a bit of a head cold," Axel recited, gingerly rubbing the back of his head.

**A head cold huh?**

"Yeah. Total pain in the ass."

Roxas arched an eyebrow, giving Axel a completely disbelieving look. The redhead blinked and shifted slightly, trying to match Roxas's gaze. "What?"

**Is that why you haven't been terrorizing me lately? Because of a measly head cold?**

"...Yes."

**You're a terrible liar.**

"Well, why do you care anyway?" Axel grumbled, averting his gaze to the ground. "It doesn't even concern you," _yes it does,_ "and haven't I been a bitch to you enough already? I mean, you should be glad that I'm finally leaving you alone! You should be-stop _looking_ at me like that!"

Roxas frowned slightly, his blue eyes locked on him like x-ray vision, like he was reading him.

In a sudden burst of rage, Axel grabbed Roxas by the collar and threw him down to the ground. He climbed over the boy's writhing body, pinning down his arms and legs. Roxas let out a little gasp, his wide blue eyes staring up at Axel's sneering expression.

"Y'wanna know what the big fucking secret it?" he breathed, leaning down close to Roxas's ear. The boy tensed, not quite sure if he should start panicking or not.

"I'm crazy, mentally unstable, fuckin' _cracked_ so quit trying to _analyze_ me." Axel let out a sharp laugh, oddly reminding Roxas of a wounded animal, and rolled off into the grass, closing his eyes. He couldn't believe he almost lost it. And in front of Roxas, too! The grass beside him rustled, moved, stopped. Axel's opened his eyes, peridot orbs practically glowing in the dark and found Roxas sitting next to him.

"...I have schizophrenia," Axel sighed out, frowning. "It's not... not bad enough to get me locked up in the nut house or something like that, but it was the reason I was acting so shitty to you. Like... I couldn't control it. And I only figured it out when you came around because the fucking voice in my head kept telling me to do bad things to you." Axel heaved another sigh and passed a hand over his face. He felt so unexplainably exhausted that he could probably fall asleep right then and there. "And now I'm on meds. ...Do you understand now?"

Roxas stared down at his lap, trying to take in all that information. So Axel _didn't_ really hate him? And want to make his life a miserable swirling pit of doom?

Axel tilted his head towards Roxas and reached up, nudging the younger's knee with his knuckles, making the boy bring his gaze back down to him. A small smile lifted the corners of his lips.

_"Yeah,"_ he mouthed, reaching out to mess up Axel's hair.

Axel grinned weakly, swatting Roxas's hand away. "So... um... we cool?"

Roxas nodded and leaned back on his hands, letting out silent breath of laughter. Axel arched an eyebrow in confusion.

_God, a kid who's mute and one who's schizo._

Roxas wiped his eyes, shoulders shaking with silent chuckles as fireflies lit up around them, with no reason to speak.

"...I'll take that as a yes."

x.x.x

**Ugghhh I really friggin' hope there aren't any goddamn typos in this thing that I spent weeks (months) on.**

**REVIEW PLEASE AND TELL ME HOW YOU LIKE IT? D:**


	11. 11 : alive with the glory of love

**Okay, before I start this bad boy, I have to say that there was a review sent to me that got me really pissed off. I get quite a bit of reviews, and tons of them say stuff like "please update soon" things like that. This is was **_**really**_** pissed me the fuck off:**

Fuck 2008-11-27 . chapter 10

well im completely bummed!  
dont call this hate mail though but,  
u suck.  
i read the last time you updated and im pissed.  
i got all into this story so that i could be disapointed.  
thankz a bunch.

**Okay. Honestly? Like you have nothing better to do than to sit there and **_**wait**_** for me to update? Like the world **_**revolves**_** around you? Get real. I have a life, too, y'know. I have **_**real-life**_** problems. Maybe I got hospitalized. Or maybe someone died. That didn't really happen but **_**what if**_** it did. You don't just sit around assuming that people don't update just to watch their readers squirm. Writers have problems too, y'know. Besides, if I had ever thought about quitting this whole fanfic thing, I probably would've put up a note sooner. I'm definitely not through with this. There's just a lot of things going on right now. So be fucking patient. People like you piss me off to hell and back. **_**I**_** don't do that and**_** you**_** should not do that. It's rude.**

**I'm sorry. I'm not a bitchy person. But that just **_**gets**_** to me. Okay?**

**One more thing, less bitchy. A lot of you guys who have reviewed say a lot of stuff like "I like this story, your writing style is cool!" Reviews like that make me giggle. I mostly write the way I speak. Only in a more sophisticated fashion. For example, I emphasize, like, everything I say (and say like, and dude, and yo a lot. lul) so that's why I use italics a lot when characters are speaking to each other. Get it? Eh? Eh? Eh? : D ((nudge))**

**In **_**conclusion**_**, to the other readers who were polite enough to say "update soon", "please" included or not, thank you and please enjoy this beast of a chapter. (Like ten pages!)**

- --- - - --- - - -- -  
**sweet** talk 101

11 : **alive with the glory of love - say anything**

"Ah...ah... R-riku! Harder...!"

The brunette boy beneath him threw his head back in pleasure, his bangs falling back from his sweaty forehead. Riku moaned in return, steadily thrusting into the tight, hot body underneath him. And god, it was so _hot_, so _amazing_, Sora was finally _his_-

"Aah... god, Sora..."

So close, he was so _close_...

So... very much awake, and very much aware of how very much alone and very much aroused he was.

"_Ugh_. Shit..." That mattress, as it turned out, did _not_ make a very good lover. Riku groaned and rolled over onto his back, the throbbing ache between his legs pissing him off even more.

"Fucking... _dammit_!" The silverette grabbed the nearest pillow, smacking it mercilessly against the wall.

x.x.x

"Wow, Riku, rough night?" Kairi asked as she and Riku walked past the school gates together.

"Don't even go there," Riku grumbled, glaring at the redheaded girl from beneath his bangs.

Kairi giggled and reached up, flicking Riku's hair away from his eyes and peered up at him. "You've got dark circles around your eyes."

"I _**what**_?!"

"And let me guess," Kairi continued casually, "You dreamed that you were in bed with Sora, fucking him into the next century and then you suddenly woke up. Am I right?"

She glanced over her shoulder, smiling sweetly, only to find that Riku had stopped a few feet away, staring at her incredulously.

"_Must_ you put it so bluntly?"

"You act as if I don't know you."

Riku frowned, a rare blush spreading across the bridge of his nose. He stomped past Kairi, muttering darkly under his breath.

"Oh, _come on_!" Kairi sighed in exasperation, hurrying to catch up with the silverette. "Why don't you just _tell_ him-"

"I can't tell him anything! He refuses to listen to me!"

"Well, _make_ him listen to you! Pin him down or something. Quit being a baby and grow a pair."

"Grow a pair?" Riku hissed venomously, accidentally attracting the attention of some giggling freshman girls. He flushed once more and grabbed Kairi's wrist, dragging her towards the parking lot. "_You're_ the one who said it was going to be easy considering that Sora's already my best friend and everything! No, _instead_, he's been doing nothing but _avoiding_ me for something completely stupid-"

"Have you ever considered that Sora mi-"

"-even _Roxas_ is more mature than that. Seriously, he and Axel are probably going to hit it off before I even get a word in!"

At that, Kairi turned her head away and coughed, suddenly mesmerized with an empty McMoogle's cup lying on the ground.

Riku stared at her, mouth agape. "Aw, no, _no_!" he moaned, grabbing his hair. "That's _bullshit_!"

Kairi arched an eyebrow and took a few steps away from the teen. Riku was acting a bit... deranged, and Kairi was sure that at the rate he was going, he'd end up ripping out handfuls of hair.

"Axel's a fucking _asshole_! And now they're okay? They're _okay_?!"

Kairi cleared her throat meaningfully and twirled a stand of hair around her finger. She would rather not answer. "I... guess so. Roxas took Axel out somewhere last night and when Axel came back he said they were on good terms."

"...How does that _work_?!"

Kairi rolled her eyes and grabbed Riku's elbow, pulling him towards the school building. God _forbid_ if Riku saw Roxas's car pull into the parking lot with Axel in shotgun. He'd go bald.

She was just glad that Axel wasn't the one driving. Last time the redhead got behind the wheel of a car while on medication he almost hit a little old lady crossing the street in a wheel chair.

...It was still weird, suddenly befriending Axel like that, but neither Roxas nor Axel felt bad about it. As long as Axel didn't lash out, Roxas was happy. Axel was glad that he felt 'sober' enough to be around the blonde in the first place.

Roxas pulled into an empty parking space and cut the ignition. An amused smile crept onto his lips when he noticed that Axel was out like a light and he reached over to nudge him awake. The redhead groaned in his sleep and edged closer to the door, trying to put as much distance as possible between himself and the offending hand. Roxas frowned and gave up, opting for giving Axel a hard punch in the shoulder instead.

"Ow!" Axel yelped with a jerk, smacking his head against the window. "Unnnggh..."

_'S what you get_, Roxas thought with a playful smirk.

"Yeah, haha, very funny," Axel growled, gingerly rubbing the side of his head. "Just because we're not fighting anymore doesn't mean that I can't beat the shit out of you."

Roxas rolled his eyes, shoving the door open. _I'd love to see you try._

Axel got the gist of the blonde's trail of thought just by his eye roll. "Oh yeah? C'mon, you and me, right here, right now," he challenged, following the other teen outside.

Roxas stared at him blankly and then burst into silent chuckles, shoulders shaking slightly. Axel could barely stay awake, let alone fight. Or stand. He seemed to have trouble doing that too.

"Oh, just you wait, I'll.. I'll.. ahhh.." Axel paused, hiding a yawn behind the sleeve of his hoodie. "..get you."

Roxas shook his head in exasperation, smiling slightly. He locked his car and headed across the parking lot, looking over his shoulder every now and then just to make sure that Axel didn't get hit by a car. ..Or walk into one..

x.x.x

Larxene and Demyx stared, mouths hanging open in shock.

"Did we... _miss_ something?" Larxene managed to choke out, still trying to wrap her mind around the fact that Axel had come to lunch with _Roxas_ of all people.

"Umm... long story... too tired," Axel offered, slumping down at the table and burying his face in his arms.

The two blondes blinked at the non-responsive mass of red hair and brought their gaze to Roxas, who only shrugged and slid into the seat next to Axel's.

"Is he brain-dead?" Demyx asked. He poked Axel's head, earning a deep growl from the confines of the sweatshirt.

Roxas smirked at that and pulled a sheet of paper out of his binder. After quickly scribbling something on it, he held it up for Larxene and Demyx to see.

**More like brainless.**

Larxene's face broke into a sudden grin, gleaming and razor-sharp. "Axeeeel, I like this kid, why didn't you introduce us before?" she purred, snatching the paper and crumpling it up before Axel could see.

The redhead lifted his head, glaring at her with dark, venomous eyes. "What, what, did he write something weird about me?"

"Oh, no, nothing like that."

Roxas sat back and watched, slightly amused by Axel's emotional instability. Being around the older boy was kind of refreshing. Of course, it might have only been the pills talking... Or Axel talking through the pills.

Roxas was quickly shaken out of his thoughts when he was grabbed by the shoulders. His nose was now buried in Axel's hoodie...

"Okay, fine, Larx. Y'wanna know what happened?"

...and the smell of cigarette smoke and cinnamon invaded his senses...

"...Roxas is my bitch."

...and he suddenly had the awful urge to replace Axel's internal organs with something explosive.

_I'M WHAT?!_

Roxas grabbed his binder, trying to beat every part of Axel that he could reach with it.

"Whoa, ow! H-hey! I was just kidding!" Axel managed through his chuckles, throwing his hands up in defense.

_I. Don't. Care, _Roxas thought, emphasizing each word with an even harder smack. One more hit for personal pleasure and the blonde gathered up his stuff, stomping away.

"Ehh, he'll crawl back..." Axel muttered with a lazy smirk.

"So, is he at least a cool kid?" Demyx wondered, propping his chin up on his hands.

"I guess so," Axel answered with a nonchalant shrug. "It's cool how the kid's got no voice but if he has to say something, he finds a way to do it."

Roxas was actually pretty damn amazing in terms of being able to cope with his problem. Axel would've probably long ago sunk to his knees in frustration and hid in the dark confines of his closet if he went without talking for more than 24 hours.

"That's... cool, I guess," the fauxhawked blonde sighed.

Axel raised an eyebrow, surprised that Demyx was still sighing like an old arthritic man over one measly person that probably didn't even care about him anymore.

"Dude, don't give me that look."

"What look? I don't have a look."

"Yes, you do, the I-can't-believe-you're-still-at-it look."

"I can't!"

"So who the hell _cares_?!" Larxene snapped, disgustingly annoyed by Demyx's whiny behaviour. "If he's blaming you for the fact that he doesn't have the balls to stand up for himself then that's bullshit!"

"Screw you, Larx! _I_ care, okay?!" Demyx shouted back, voice rising and nearly cracking. "Don't talk shit about things you don't understand!" He grabbed his bag, leaving in a very pissed-off-Roxas-like fashion. He went to the library, where no one hung around during lunch period. Zexion was never there anymore either...

"Christ, no need to rub it in my face," Demyx grumbled to himself, making his way to the rarely visited history section where he could truly mope in peace. He made it all the way to the end of the row and slumped to the floor, leaning against the dusty bookshelf.

...But the scent of the books around him made him think of Zexion...

He didn't understand why he didn't just let himself give up. They were both hurting and Demyx was obviously making it worse by pressing the subject. But he just... couldn't let it go. Let Zexion go. Like there was something written in his cells, in every part of his being that refused to give him the right to do so. He knew he could fix this... somehow.

x.x.x

The clock on the wall slowly ticked past the lunch hour, lulling Demyx into a light doze. Next thing he knew, something was tickling his nose. Demyx jerked slightly, ocean eyes fluttering open only to see a small piece of paper floating down to rest on his stomach. He blinked at it in surprise and picked it up, turning it over in his fingers. Scribbled on the front were the words **Are you okay?**

"...What?"

He looked around, trying to find a sign that someone else was in here. A small scuffle sounded in his ears and he lifted his head, looking at the top of the bookshelf. Staring back at him were a pair of large blue eyes, framed by blonde bangs.

"O-oh, _shit_! Roxas! You scared the crap out of me!" Demyx hissed, scrambling to his feet.

Roxas grinned and hopped down, landing on the opposite side of the bookshelf, and walked over to Demyx's side.

"_Are you okay?_" he mouthed, tilting his head curiously.

"You came all this way just to ask me that?" Demyx asked, feeling a bit flattered.

_No, I just came in here to inhale the dust._ Roxas rolled his eyes and nodded.

"...Haha, you're weird, dude."

_Look who's talking_.

Demyx chuckled, awkwardly rubbing the back of his neck. "Ah... heh... yeah. I guess. I'm okay... kinda. Just... I'm in a big fight with a friend of mine."

Roxas raised an eyebrow and crossed his arms, showing that he was listening.

"C'mon dude, it's not something you'd be interested in. Nothing special, just my own problems. Don't you have your hands full with Axel, anyway?"

Roxas crinkled his nose and waved his hand dismissively.

"Okay, fine." Demyx sighed and took a deep breath, trying to figure out where to start. "See, I have this friend... _used_ to have this friend. Right? It's not like he's stupid or ugly or unpopular, _god_, lord above, no, but my swim teammates always used to pick on him just because I hung out with him. And... I guess I was too stupid to realize that I had to help out, y'know, stand up for him... But I... I kinda just... ignored-" Demyx suddenly cut himself off, frowning deeply and thinking to himself.

Roxas gave him a disapproving look and grabbed a pen from his bag, writing **Have you apologized?** on his hand.

"Dude, if my apologies were quarters, I'd be rich by now." The fauxhawked blonde groaned, half-heartedly punching the bookshelf. "I don't... I don't know what else to do. I don't want to give up but I've tried so many things! Dude, I even fucking _sang_ under his bedroom window and he chucked a lamp at me!"

The other blonde smiled at the last bit, intrigued with the way Demyx was so _set_ on Zexion that he didn't even realize it. Could it be love?

**Maybe he's scared**, Roxas wrote, absently thinking about how he was probably going to get cancer from writing on his hands all time.

"Scared?" Demyx repeated incredulously. "Scared of what, that I-oh." ...That it would happen again.

_Now you've got it._

"Oh shit," Demyx groaned, tiredly passing in hands over his face. "Fuck, I have to talk to him-"

Roxas raised a hand, shaking his head with a frown.

"No? Are you serious?"

**Give him time**, Roxas wrote.

Demyx frowned, running a hand anxiously through his hair. He just had his epiphany and now he had to _wait_?

"...I guess that's only fair..." Demyx trailed off and leaned down, picking his stuff up almost mechanically. "Thanks man, okay? I owe you." He smiled crookedly and walked past Roxas before the blonde even had a chance to respond.

The bell rang a few moments later, flooding the halls with teenagers. Demyx paused for a moment, stopping dead in the middle of the hall. People walked on past, like river water running around rocks. He felt like he was his own island, one that no one cared about. But that was okay. Because in that hallway, Demyx came to the conclusion that no one else mattered and what anyone else thought didn't matter either.

Only Zexion did.

x.x.x

"Riku, did you come here to mope, or are you _actually_ going to help me with this project?"

"You know what?" Riku suddenly cut in, jerking his head up from the coffee table. "You know _what_, Kairi? I started thinking a while ago that maybe the only reason that Sora's been acting like a fucking nut for the past few weeks was because maybe he liked me so I _teased_ him about and now he's avoiding me so fucking _well_ that I'm not even sure he exists anymore!"

"...You're not allowed to drink coffee anymore," Kairi announced, picking up the mug that Riku had been drinking from.

"Is it, like, national emo week, or something?" Axel wondered, stepping out of the kitchen and leaning against the doorjamb. "Me... you... Demyx... his emo friend..."

Riku twitched and grabbed the glue bottle, chucking it at Axel's head.

"You freak," Axel grumbled, rubbing the slowly forming bruise on his forehead. "Ever thought that by teasing Sora you're making him even more frustrated?"

"He could talk to me about it!"

"Why? So you can make fun of him again?"

"I wasn't doing it on purpose!"

"How does _he_ know that?!"

"What do _you_ know?"

"More than you!"

The boys glared at each other, a tense and awkward silence following their argument. Suddenly, before Kairi or Axel could even blink, Riku had leapt over coffee table, slamming Axel against the wall.

"What... the fuck?!" Axel yelped, jerking his knee into Riku's stomach.

Kairi sighed in exasperation, shoulders slumping a bit. How disappointing. Kairi left the warm sanctuary of her loveseat and walked into the kitchen (stepping over Riku and Axel who had thrown each other to the floor). She grabbed the water pitcher in the fridge, swirling the liquid inside around and around, wondering if it was worth it.

"...Yeeaah, I think it is."

The small redhead walked out with a bright smile on her face, turning the pitcher over on top Riku and Axel's heads.

Axel shouted out, scrambling away as though he'd been electrocuted. Riku sat there in a deadpan silence, taking a deep breath a few minutes later.

"I'm leaving," he said finally, walking out without another word, water still dripping from his hair.

"You just _had _to butt in, didn't you?" Kairi asked, planting her hands on her hips. Her universal sign of dominance, of power, of you-are-my-bitch-and-you-have-to-listen-to-me. "Now Riku's gone and I can't finish this stupid project by myself!"

"He's gotta figure out sometime that he's being a dickface!"

"Oh, just like you were to Roxas?" Kairi snapped. Just like that. To Axel it was like a stab to the brain, a harsh reminder, the post-it note that was stuck to your bathroom mirror. She gathered up her poster and the rest of her materials from the coffee table and stomped upstairs.

Axel stared at the spot where Kairi was only moments before. He cursed under his breath, raking his fingers through his hair. "...That was low, Kairi."

x.x.x

_This is it, now or never_, Riku thought, gripping the steering wheel tightly as he drove to Sora house. It was the moment of truth. The big, beastly, ugly moment of truth that would either make him the happiest guy or regret even _thinking_ about going to Sora. Regardless, when Roxas opened the door, Sidekick in one hand and Simba in the other, he was quite surprised to see Riku standing there, dripping wet.

"Get Sora."

"_Finally_," Roxas mouthed with a roll of his eyes. He dropped Simba to the floor and commenced the hunt for his twin.

The brown fluff of a cat mewed and wove himself through Riku's legs, purring loudly. Riku leaned down with a sigh, scratching Simba behind the ears.

"You'll still like me even if Sora doesn't, right?"

Simba rubbed up against him and then shivered uncomfortably, flinching away from the water and trotting away.

"Thanks," Riku huffed in defeat. He could faintly make out Sora hissing at his brother down the hall.

"R-rox, no, NO! I will _not_-ohhiriku!"

Sora stumbled into the hallway, the biggest, fakest grin plastered on his face. "...Why are you we-"

"Cut the bullshit, Sora," Riku interrupted, narrowing his eyes at the brunette.

"...Cut the bullshit?" Sora asked, his smile falling away and quickly being replaced by a scowl. "Cut the _bullshit_, Riku?!" He glared back at Riku, hurt and confusion swirling in his large blue eyes. Okay, sure, he had to admit that he over-reacted a bit to the whole face-crotch thing, but afterwards, when Riku began to pick on him... that was just _mean_. _That_ was bullshit. "Why don't _you_ cut the bullshit! And get out of my fuckin' house, I don't need you-!"

"-I need you!"

_Did he just say he needed me?_ Sora thought, startled into silence by Riku's outburst. The silverette offered nothing else and stared at him, his cheeks slightly red.

"...What?"

Riku bit his lip and stepped closer to Sora, closing the door behind him. There were two things he could do. Brush off what he had said and say something else instead... or repeat himself. But what if Sora rejected him, pushed away, far, far away...?

"...I said, I need you," the silverette finally mumbled, truthfully, his nervousness becoming apparent in his eyes.

Sora fell silent again, unable to respond with a decent, or at least sympathetic statement.

Riku cut his eyes away and rubbed the back of his neck, Sora's gaze making him even more nervous. It wasn't like him, to be like this. He was always laid-back and confident and cocky, but... around Sora, the walls just fell. And they had fallen hard this time. "I... I like you, Sora, okay?" he began slowly, carefully choosing his words. "But it seems like I've been driving you away instead of bringing you closer." _Okay, honestly? Grow some balls, like, right now Riku-_ "Okay. No. Fuck that. I love you, Sora. And if you're not okay with that then tell me so right now to my face."

There were a few fleeting seconds of silence, with no response from Sora's end. Finally, the brunette raised an eyebrow and said, "You love _me_?" It wasn't exactly the reaction Riku had been expecting from the boy.

"No, Sora, I love the _door_!" Riku retorted sharply, starting to get a bit annoyed.

"Hey! No need to get pissy!"

"Yes I love _you_! And don't tell me to not get pissy, it's hard okay? I would've never dreamed that one day I'd be standing at your front door telling you that I love you..! ...But here I am."

Sora quickly swallowed down the lump in his throat and ducked his head, trying to hide the blush on his cheeks. He didn't really have to, though. Riku couldn't look him in the eye either. Sora knew he was waiting, waiting for an answer, but did he expect him to come up with one _now_?

The brunette knew he was going to have to say something soon, but he was going to have to choose his words wisely. Even if he did fill with some sort of strange, giddy euphoria at the mere thought of being near Riku... he was too scared to called it love.

So instead, he stepped closer to the older boy and gingerly wrapped his arms around Riku's waist. "I missed you," he mumbled, relieved to feel Riku relax against him.

"I... uh... missed you too, Sora," Riku said softly, as though afraid that if he spoke louder, he'd scare Sora off. His arms left his sides, coming up to wrap around Sora's small shoulders.

"Look, Riku... I can't say that I love you back, because I don't think that it's the right time to say it. But if you want me to go out with you, then I'm willing."

From somewhere up above, he heard Riku's breath hitch. "Really? You're not just saying-"

"No, no, I mean it!" Sora said earnestly, lifting his head to look up at Riku.

"Heh... you've no idea how scared I was, coming over here," Riku said with a lopsided grin.

"Well, we all get a little scared sometimes, don't we? I guess sometimes, it's worth it."

x.x.x

**...FINALLY. **

**I'm gonna try updating sooner guys, I really will. I know how most of you feel, sitting their in your awesome (or not awesome) swivel chairs, clicking your favorites, only to see that NO. SHE DID NOT UPDATE YET. WOE.**

**But I've actually been writing a lot of stuff lately. In notebooks. Yeah. Old-skool baby. So expect something new from me by Christmas. ...I hope. ((cringe)) Chapter 12 is already written! I just have to type it up. (You'll get to read about what happens with Dem and Zex! Woo!)**

**So if anyone's still out there reading this, please review and let me know that my readers are still alive? : D except for that one douchebag. That I hate. And will probably recieve hate mail from for saying all these things. Lulz.**


	12. 12 : nine in the afternoon

**Um. I'mdoing this at nearly three in the morning happy new year i'm not really coherent so just read this and live with it until i find the energy to proofread it thank you ((passes out in peace)).**

**ps. the first part is ax and rox texting messaging, the next is ax at therapy and then blah blahblah....**

- - ----- - - - -- -  
**sweet** talk 101

12 : nine in the afternoon - **panic! at the disco**

**Kairi really did it this time.**

**It can't be that bad. Oh. Riku's over, confessing his love or some shit.**

**To u?**

**No! To Sora!**

**Whatevr. I dont care anymore. She compared Rikus jackassness to me and you. Isnt that rly fuckin low?**

**Ouch. I'm sorry. She was probably just pissed. Don't worry about it too much.**

**Yeah whatever. Im gonna go take my meds.**

**Have fun.**

**Listen, Dem Larx and i are gonna hang out on Sat. Wanna come over?**

**Am I gonna be initiated into the group?**

**Hah we'll see. Later.**

Roxas smiled and threw his Sidekick onto his bed. He picked Spencer up off the floor and settled down on the floor, playing along to the soft voices down the hall.

x.x.x

Axel like Aeris' office. It was roomy, and there was a couch against the wall (which was probably the comfiest thing Axel's ass had come in contact with) and there were large floor-to-ceiling windows that let the sunlight in. There were plants, too, of all kinds and in colors that Axel thought could never exist on a flower. Their intoxicating aroma blanketed him each time he entered the room, bringing him into a strange, peaceful state of mind. ...Not only that, but he could sit wherever the hell he pleased.

This week, he stretched himself out on the floor.

"...And then she was all, 'oh, like you were a jerk to Roxas?' What's up with _that_, Doc?"

"You obviously made her mad by getting into something that wasn't your business."

Axel frowned at the ceiling fan and leaned up on his elbows. "I know, but I was only trying to help. Riku's gotta grow some balls. And she didn't have to take it that far!"

"A lot of people don't think about what they're saying when they're angry," Aeris pointed out, tugging absently on some of her brunette curls.

"Well... she apologized, so I guess it's okay. I just can't believe she said that."

"I doubt she meant it. After all, she knows what you're going through."

"Like hell she does. No one but me knows how it's like."

Aeris pulled off her glasses, gingerly rubbing the bridge of her nose. "She knows your _situation. _She couldn't possibly understand unless she was schizophrenic herself."

Axel hummed, head cocking curiously to the side. "Do you understand?"

"I've worked with people like you for years. I'm pretty sure I have at least an inkling. Now then, let's talk about Roxas, shall we?"

"Ugghh...."

"You act like it's a bad thing. What's your current relationship with him?"

"...I guess we're pretty okay friends," Axel said, crossing his legs and slouching over so that he could comfortably rest his elbows on his knees. "Like, we hang out a lot and he drives me to school because no one trusts me around a car."

"You haven't been getting any... strange thoughts around him?"

"...What _kind_ of strange thoughts?" Axel asked, waggling his eyebrows suggestively.

"_Axel_."

"_No_, I _haven't_. And before you ask, _yes_ I've been taking my medication when I'm supposed to and _yes_, the side-effects are getting better." Minus the tree he mistook for a dragon... that one time.

Aeris smiled contently and clasped her hands together, resting her chin on them. "Impressive. You haven't been drinking, have you?"

"Psh, hell no," Axel scoffed, rolling his head back on his neck. "But you've no idea how badly I wanna get out and get smashed like a fuckin' window."

"Are you still smoking?"

"Um, yeah, thankyouverymuch."

"It's not a good idea to smoke and take your medication at the same time," Aeris warned, feeling just a bit concerned for the boy.

"Well, I've been trying to quit, big, fat, freaking _duh_," Axel drawled, waving his arms around to emphasize his point. Aeris watched him with an unusually impatient expression on her face. "But, like... I can't. At this point, it feels like the last normal thing I can do." Axel paused and looked around, surveying everything in the room. "It'd be like if you got depressed and someone took your flowers away."

Aeris smiled slightly and leaned back in her chair. "As that may be, flowers aren't bad for your health."

"Uh-huh, find me something else that isn't."

"Maybe a hobby? Object? Person?"

"Aw, what about _you_, Doc? Bet it's watering these damn plants."

To his surprise, Aeris shook her head, her green eyes getting a warm look to them. "I dance."

"No _shit_!"

"...Yes, Axel."

"Damn, you gotta teach me something, sometime," Axel suggested, a grin spreading across his face.

"We'll see."

Axel chuckled and glanced over his shoulder at the Mickey Mouse clock that was mounted above the door. There session was almost up, and for once, he had actually felt pretty damn comfortable with it. As long as Aeris kept to her promise and didn't tell his parents...

"...You're pretty cool, Gainsborough. If you weren't my therapist and ten years younger, I'd totally bang you." Axel's grin grew at the way Aeris' eyebrows disappeared under her bangs.

"...Charming," she mumbled, rolling her eyes skyward in annoyance.

"Yeeaah, I know I am." Axel stood and stretched, his joints popping in protest after being in one position for so long. He ruffled his hair and then slipped his hands into his pockets, waiting for Aeris to walk him to the door.

"You know, maybe you should ask Roxas to help you with your smoking problem," Aeris suggested with a strange little smile.

"... Yeah, sure. Then I can ask him to end world hunger and bring peace on earth."

x.x.x

Roxas sat down on Axel's front porch on a bright saturday morning, ten minutes of ringing the doorbell having done absolutely nothing except give him a ringing headache. Maybe Axel was taking a shower. Or washing dishes (he couldn't imagine Axel washing dishes though). Roxas was sure it was water he heard running from behind the door.

A few small children ran after each other along the street, laughing and spilling ice cream on the warm pavement.

"Watch, ten years from now I'll be chasing them and stealing their booze."

Roxas started, his heart jerking inside his ribcage from surprise. He whirled around to face the tall, lanky redhead towering above him, a grin appearing on his face. _Stealing their booze, huh?_ he thought, arching an amused eyebrow. Axel smirked back, running a hand lazily through his wet spikes.

"Sorry, Rox. Shower. C'mon, get your scrawny ass inside."

Roxas got off the porch steps and brushed past him with a haughty puff of air. He'd already been in Axel's house a few times, but only went in as far as the front. Mostly because he was waiting for Axel to wake up so he could drive him to school and Kairi invited him in to wait. He never had any purpose to venture in further.

He walked down the hallway and into the living room, feeling a little awkward. It was quiet, so he absently clicking his tongue ring against his teeth, wishing he could make small talk, anything... but he couldn't.

"Demyx and Larx should be over soon," Axel said, following the boy. "You got here pretty early, huh?"

_Um, yeah, and I had to wait outside for about a million years-_Roxas shrugged.

"Well... uh... sooooo..." Roxas and Axel stared at each other for a long moment, another awkward pause settling between them.

"_Kairi_?" Roxas finally mouthed.

"Iunno. Off to do some girly things with Selphie and Yuffie."

_Oh. So that's where Yuffie ran off to._

Roxas sighed and trudged over to the couch, slumping ungracefully into the cushions. He pulled out his Sidekick, clicked a few buttons and then threw the device at Axel.

**How was therapy?**

"Eh, easier," Axel answered with a shrug. He decided to invade Roxas's privacy and began scrolling through his folders. "Like, before, I was all 'Is telling my shit to someone I don't even know really going to make me feel better?' and stuff. But I guess it's kind of okay. Have you noticed I stopped bitching at you lately?"

Roxas rolled his eyes and held his hand out for the phone, but Axel ignored him, opening up tons of different pictures.

"And medication only goes so far, y'know? Like, talking... I don't know. It feels like I'm letting go of the weight on my sh-are these your friends?" he suddenly asked in an ADD type manner, holding up the phone for Roxas to see. The blonde barely had enough time to nod his head before Axel went on rambling again. "I don't know. It's just nice. To talk, I mean. And then I go, well _shit._ Roxas can't do that. What the fuck is that about?"

Roxas deadpanned and then shook his head in an incredulous manner. _You just figured that out?_

Axel smiled sheepishly, watching Roxas in amazement as the boy fell back against the armrest and threw an arm over his face, body shaking from laughter.

"Hey now," Axel whined, nudging Roxas knee with his foot. "It's not nice to laugh at other people."

Roxas shook Axel's hand off and stuck his tongue out, a bright, neon-yellow ball smack dab in the middle of it. Axel waggled his eyebrows suggestively and poked out his own orange tongue ring.

The blonde boy grinned and opened his mouth feeling something swell in his chest, his throat... and when he opened his mouth, only silence greeted the air. Roxas blinked, surprised with himself and blushed in embarrassment. Axel cocked his head to the side, watching him with concern, but Roxas only turned away. What had that been all about? It had felt so _real_, the words, the sounds bubbling up inside of him only to quell and return to dormancy.

"You okay, Rox?" Axel asked quietly, a small knowing smile on his face. Roxas shrugged and the redhead reached over, ruffling the kid's blonde spikes. "It's okay."

Roxas shrunk away from Axel's hand, still a bit mortified. The hell was that?

"C'mon, Rox, you-"

"AXEL! IF YOU DON'T OPEN THIS DOOR RIGHT NOW THEN SO HELP ME GOD-!"

"_Jesus_!" Axel hissed, clutching at his chest where his heart was pounding between his ribcage. Roxas was in almost the same situation, only he had fallen off the couch from fright.

"AXEL, I'M GOING TO-"

"SHUT UP! I'M FUCKING COMING, _GOD_!" Axel sighed in annoyance, rubbing the bridge of his nose. "Yell it fuckin' louder, Dem," he grumbled, reaching out a hand to help Roxas up. "I don't think they heard you in Never Was." Grumbling to himself, Axel stalked down the hall to unlock the door, letting a frazzled fauxhawked blonde in. Demyx made a beeline for the living room, making an almost practiced dive under the coffee table. Roxas shot him a suspicious look and pulled his legs up onto the couch as though Demyx would just jump out and start gnawing on his legs.

"Um... is he on pills, or something?" Axel asked after Larxene let herself in.

"Hell if I know. Got any food?" Without waiting for a response, Larxene sauntered off into the kitchen, completely forgetting about Demyx and Roxas.

"Shut up!" Demyx wailed from underneath the coffee table. "If anyone asks, I'm not _here_!"

"Dude, c'mon, enough of this bullshit. Leave my coffee table alone." Axel walked over to the table, giving one of its legs a hard kick.

"No, _no_! _He's_ coming!"

"Who is _he_?!"

"Zexion!"

"...You've gotta be fucking kidding me. What the hell is he doing, coming all the way out here?"

Demyx bit his lower lip, hesitantly sticking his head out. "... He... Well... Nami called when me 'n' Larx were walking over here and she said Zex was over asking for me. So I said 'Why?' and she said 'I dunno' and I said 'And then what?' and she said 'I told him you went to Axel's' and I said 'Fucking hell' and she said 'What?' and I said 'He's going to smack me or something' and she said 'That's stupid' and I hung up and ran over here and now I'm _terrified_!"

Demyx looked up at Axel expectantly, waiting for an answer, but the redhead only stared at him, mouth agape.

"...Ugh. Demyx. You give me headaches."

Roxas smiled to himself and knelt down on the floor, reaching for Demyx's arm.

"Holy_ shit_, Rox, when'd you get here?!"

_Oh, y'know, I just teleported in five seconds ago._

The blonde smirked and motioned with his hand for Demyx to come out.

"No way am I coming out, Zexion could be here any sec-ah!"

Roxas had gone over to the other side of the table and grabbed Demyx by the ankles, attempting to yank him out. _Are you kidding me?! I thought you wanted to talk to him, you pussy! Be a man! Grow some balls, dammit!_

"No, no, _no_!" Demyx hissed in protest, grabbing onto the table's legs.

"This is ridiculous," Axel grit out, rubbing his temples at an attempt to fend away an oncoming migraine. "What's so bad about him coming to see you?! What's there to freak out about?!"

"I don't want to see him! What if he comes here and tells me he hates me and never wants me to come near him ever again? Then what? I'll fucking _die_, okay?!"

"Come _on_! Roxas grab his legs again, I'll grab his arms-ow! Don't bite me!" Axel glared, sucking on his forefinger. That... little... _bitch_. He was going to give Zexion hell for making him go through this with Demyx.

Larxene watched from the kitchen doorway, dragging a spoon through a cup of yogurt. "Wow, Deeeemyx, you're such a _sissy_," she drawled, leering at the blonde.

"Am not!"

"Are too, you fucking girl. Might as well grow a vagina and some boobs because you obviously don't even have the balls to _talk_ to him."

"I do too!" Demyx paused and then narrowed his eyes at Larxene. "Besides, you're not one to talk, since I've never seen _you_ in this type of situation."

Larxene scoffed, shaking her blonde head. "Doesn't make you any less of a girl."

The doorbell suddenly rang, its sound resonating throughout the house and making Demyx squeak.

Roxas was growing quickly tired and disappointed with this display from Demyx. It was a bit pathetic. He had been trying to get Zexion's attention for so long and when he finally had it, he was going to be a chicken about it?

_Not on my watch._

Roxas gave Demyx's legs a sharp yank, producing a surprised gasp from the other blonde.

"Rox, man, seriously!"

Roxas glared at him and grabbed Demyx around the waist, hauling him to his feet. Demyx was too shocked to do much except let himself get dragged to the front door. His heart was beating a mile a minute inside his chest, just the thought of seeing Zexion was making his head dizzy, his nerves go haywire. Roxas threw open the front door and shoved Demyx out onto the front porch. Demyx stumbled slightly, bumping his head into a black-clothed chest in front of him. It was stupid, he knew, and everyone else thought it was stupid too... but they couldn't possibly know how he felt.

...It wasn't even spring, yet Cupid was working fucking overtime.

Demyx took a nervous step back and slowly lifted his head, taking in the sight of a slender neck, a pale face framed by dark bangs and a visible violet eye. Surprisingly, Zexion seemed pretty stoic.

"...Z-zex...I..."

"I'm sorry-"

"-I know I-... what?"

Zexion stared at Demyx's surprised expression for a moment before flicking his eyes away. His own face fell a bit, weighed down by sadness. "I said I'm sorry. I didn't mean to give you such a hard time when all you were trying to do was apologize to me."

"Zex... please..." Demyx murmured, shaking his head forlornly. He had so speak, had to say something... what if he said the wrong thing? "Don't apologize. None of this was your fault. Hell, I woulda probably ignored me too if I were you."

Demyx offered Zexion a shaky smile, and lowered himself down onto the steps, motioning for Zexion to sit with him. Zexion didn't move for a long moment before finally relenting and taking a seat next to the blonde.

"It's all... my fault," Demyx began softly, staring blankly at the pavement. "I mean... I was stupid and selfish and inconsiderate of your feelings. It was a_ terrible_ thing for me to do, to not help you, especially since you're... you were my friend. I was awful, wasn't I?"

Zexion chose not to answer, staring at his lap instead. If this was going to go right, he was going to have to let Demyx speak.

"You should've never had to be put through that and I'm sorry... I... I don't know how many more apologies it will take..."

"No... it's okay," Zexion muttered softly. "Yeah, you hurt and betrayed me-" Demyx flinched visibly, "-But it takes a lot to admit that you're wrong and apologize over and over after all that. I guess... that kind of makes up for everything."

Demyx flushed in surprise and looked away when Zexion turned to him and smiled slightly. He prayed that his body would not betray him and turn him into a bright red tomato. "I-I... I don't think I'll ever be able to get over what I did to you," Demyx whispered, voice laced with shame.

But Zexion shook his head and lifted his hand, resting it lightly on top of the blonde's. "I'm tired of this, so let's just put it behind us once and for all, alright?"

Demyx passed his free hand over his blushing face, trying to pass it off as tiredness. "Y-yeah... sounds good, Zex. Perfect."

x.x.x

Axel watched Zexion and Demyx angrily from the window, the way they leaned close to speak to each other, the way Demyx's whole face lit up, the way Zexion didn't back away from him, and he seethed on the inside.

"Are you kidding me?" he half-shrieked, rounding on Roxas. "Are you fucking _kidding_ me?! I've been trying to get him to do that for weeks! _Weeks_! And all he needed was a good kick in the balls?!"

Roxas grinned smugly, flipping Axel the finger.

"Don't look now, but loverboy number one is coming," Larxene drawled, smirking behind her spoon.

"H-hey, Ax!" Demyx called, bursting through the front door with a giant grin on his face. Axel grimaced inwardly, hardly being able to _fathom­ _what that look could possibly mean. "Listen, um... I was kind of wondering if it'd be okay if I split for today? I mean, Zex and I-"

"Go, just _go_," Axel insisted through gritted teeth. "...Quickly, before I change my mind and punch you in the face."

Demyx laughed nervously (Axel really scared him sometimes), and gave the redhead a quick one-armed hug before bounding out the door like an excited puppy. Axel rolled his eyes, exchanging an annoyed look with Larxene.

"Demyx is a sweet kid but just being around him makes me want to take a nap," the blonde female sighed, and then smiled brightly. "Oh, well. Guess I better go. It's not fun without Demyx to poke fun at." With that, Larxene left, still in possession of Axel's yogurt cup (which he didn't really want anymore) and his spoon.

Axel groaned, slumping down on the couch. Roxas smiled to himself, taking a seat beside the redhead.

"They're really good friends, honest," Axel offered, staring up at the ceiling. "They just have... uh..."

**ADD?**

Axel blinked at the little white screen in front of his eyes and let out a laugh. "Yeah. That. I'm actually kinda glad they left. In my current state, I don't think I'd be able to stand against Dem's constant blabbering or Larxene's sarcasm."

He let out a deep breath and tilted his head back against the couch, closing his eyes. He missed the fleeting warm look Roxas sent his way. The two of them sat in a comfortable silence for a long while, not even bothering to get up when the phone rang. The answering machine finally decided to do it for them.

"Ax, it's Kairi... you there? Ah, whatever, you're probably having a montage, fornicating with your friends-" Axel snorted at the small giggle he heard in the background, probably Selphie, "-So I'll just tell you that I'm sleeping over Selph's tonight. Oh! And don't forget your meds, byebye!"

"...Auuugggh."

Roxas giggled to himself, casting a sidelong glance at Axel, who threw an arm over his eyes, groaning theatrically.

"Damn you, Kairi." With superhuman effort, the redhead heaved himself off the couch, trudging into the kitchen for his medication. Roxas remained on the couch, staring blankly at the answering machine. So he was going to be alone, huh?

_Aw._

When Axel came back in, the blonde threw his Sidekick at him. It was starting to become a predictable routine.

**Do you want me to stay with you tonight?**

Axel's eyebrows rose practically into his hairline, telling Roxas that he had given the older teen the wrong impression. "And, uh, what context is that question in?"

_Perv,_ Roxas thought, chucking a cushion forcefully at Axel's head.

"Hah!" Axel shouted triumphantly, the pillow missing him by mere inches and bouncing off the wall. "You missed-oh shit. What are you gonna do, shank me with the remote control?"

Roxas arched an eyebrow, daring Axel to go against him. The remote control was clutched in his hand, ready to hit Axel with 500 plus channels.

"You_ wouldn't_."

Roxas stood and took a step closer to him, a smirk spreading across his face. Axel swallowed thickly and made a mad dash for the stairs, nearly kicking the carpet from underneath his feet. Roxas sprung after him, quickly covering distance. Axel double-backed at the top of the stairs, sliding down the banister past Roxas with a huge grin. The blonde whirled around, cheeks flushed from the sudden rush of adrenaline and made an impulsive leap at Axel. His arms flew out around the taller's waist and the two hung in midair for a moment before both bodies toppled right over the railing and into the loveseat that rested against the wall.

"Ugh... holy... _shit_, kid," Axel groaned beneath the small boy sprawled out on top of him. Roxas was practically motionless, save for the shaking that his laughter produced. He heard Axel's soft chuckles somewhere above his head and the manic beating of his heart.

The two stayed like that for a few minutes, trying to regain their breathing and steady their hearts. Roxas secretly enjoyed listening to the beating get softer and calmer, but Axel didn't need to know that.

"Man, it's never a boring moment with you around," Axel mumbled, gently ruffling the blonde's spikes.

_Likewise_, Roxas thought, letting out a small, breathy laugh.

"But actually... I wouldn't mind if you spent the night," Axel said with a grin, and then quickly added, "I get freakishly paranoid when I'm alone, so it'd be pretty cool to have some company..." He trailed off at Roxas's lack of response and ran a hand awkwardly through his mane of red hair.

Roxas finally shrugged against Axel's chest. He normally wouldn't have cared either way, but at this point, he would've felt pretty bad for leaving Axel alone in his current state.

"Ah... really? You don't mind? I meant, you don't have to if you don't want to..."

"_It's okay_," Roxas mouthed, lifting his head with a grin.

"Awesoooome," Axel crowed happily, fluffing Roxas's hair. The boy pouted and swatted at the redhead's hand, eliciting a laugh from him. "So how about you and I hit the Disney Channel and watch the greatest movies in the world for the next... uh... four hours?"

Roxas was already bounding towards the couch with a silly little grin on his face before Axel even finished speaking.

x.x.x

Their movie marathon greatly exceeding four hours and the two teens found themselves stumbling to Axel's room in the dead of night. Their half asleep state induced enough giggling every time they bumped into each other that they almost became wide awake. They tried to hold on to their drowsy state, keeping it deep in their chests, because honestly, both of them wanted to sleep.

Axel shooed Roxas up the stairs to his room, telling him to go rummage around for some clothes to sleep in and crash since he had to down more medicine.

Axel's room was cold, something Roxas realized with annoyance, considering how warm the actual redhead was. He walked across the room, stepping over random articles of clothing and magazines and closed the window after taking a deep breath of what seemed to be the last lingering remnants of summer air. The streets no longer baked quietly in the hours after the sun went down and the children returned to their homes earlier and the fireflies and crickets quickly diminished. He sighed somewhat sadly as he looked around for something to sleep in. Cold weather depressed him a bit because it meant that gone where the hot, idle summer days and the earth slowly died and gathered energy to be reborn. Only the holiday seasons were something to look forward to.

Roxas finally dug out a pair of sweatpants and a tight but ridiculously long red shirt and slid into Axel's bed. The scent of spice, apple, and cigarette smoke calmed him and immediately knocked him out. He hadn't even made it under the sheets.

Axel ambled in a few moments later, drugged up and drowsier than ever. He didn't really need to take them again, but he didn't want to wake up tomorrow morning with Roxas next to him and harsh reality hovering above him ready to bitchslap him in the face.

The redhead stripped down to his boxers, all angles and joints and sharp hipbones, and crawled in beside Roxas. The room was still chilly so he pulled the comforter over both of them and let sleep drag him deeper and deeper into a warm, dark ocean.

Before he fell asleep, he absently realized that he hadn't smoked once that day.


	13. 13 : folkin' around

**LOL. Another panic! song. I was gonna use ... ummm. Say Anything, butbut I'm gonna save it for laterrr. Yea. So Demyx (my laptop) ...committed suicide via trojan virus. So then he fucked Vista and is all better now : DDDD**

**ps. chloe i dont care if you hate panic so get over it. love you.**

**typos galore.**

- - -- -- - --- --- -  
**sweet** talk 101

13 : folkin' around - **panic! at the disco**

Demyx practically bounced down the front steps as he bolted out of Axel's house, almost intoxicated with childlike glee. Zexion arched an amused eyebrow, waiting for the blonde by the sidewalk.

"So where are we going?" Demyx asked once they fell in step with each other.

Zexion shrugged, slipping his hands into the pockets of his jeans (and how badly Demyx wanted to pull them back out, twine their fingers together). "I don't know. Any place that allows some decent human privacy."

Demyx chuckled, remembering that Zexion had something he liked to call Personal Bubble Syndrome. "Wanna grab some coffee? My treat."

"...Yeah. Fine."

Demyx grinned and threaded his thumbs into his belt loops, ultimately squashing the urge to hold the other's hand. It was hard, though. It felt like every cell in his body was shaking with electricity the closer they walked. "How... how've you been doing?" he asked softly, not wanted to break the comfortable silence that had enveloped them.

"Well," Zexion answered with a shrug. "Not off any worse than before, I suppose."

The blonde winced. "I was... scared, when Naminé called me and said you were coming to find me," he admitted, instantly remembering what Roxas had told him. "Were you scared?"

"Still am."

"...I guess that's my punishment, huh?"

"As much as yours as it is mine."

"I kind of want to hate myself for it."

"You can't hate anything, Demyx, it's your tragic flaw."

"Tragic _flaw_?" Demyx echoed incredulously.

Zexion flicked his gaze at him, and quickly looked away, a ghost of a smirk passing over his lips. "Only sometimes."

"...Yeah, thanks." Despite the sarcasm, Demyx had missed the verbal banter. He even missed the way Zexion often liked to end their arguments with some witty remark that had Demyx storming off in anger, looking for a dictionary.

x.x.x

At the coffee shop, Demyx ordered the most random thing on the menu (which seemed to be a concoction of iced coffee, coconut, and caramel) while Zexion asked for black coffee. And no. _No_, he was not an emo little fuck, contrary to his stereotypical looks. And he did not drink stereotypical black coffee. In actuality, he had a very _un_stereotypical sweet tooth that left him pouring so much cream and sugar into his coffee that he couldn't flat out ask for it unless he _wanted_ the weird looks.

"So... how are Larxene and Axel doing?" Zexion asked, once they grabbed a table in the back of the shop, away from prying eyes.

Demyx shrugged, scooping some whipped cream out of his cup with his pinky. "Iunno. Larxene's PMSy and weird and scary, like always, and I'm pretty sure Axel's developed ADD or something like that."

"Maybe he caught it from you."

"I do _not_ have ADD," Demyx grumbled, kicking Zexion in the shin. "But whatever. I don't want to talk about Larx or Axel or anybody else right now except for you."

"What is there to talk about?" Zexion frowned, flicking his bangs away in sudden irritation. The period of time without Demyx wasn't something he enjoyed thinking about.

"What did you do?"

"You act like I had nothing to do without you around."

"I'm just wondering! Christ, Zex."

"I don't _remember_. I don't know. I buried myself up to the elbows in books and ate and slept and breathed."

"Sounds enlightening."

"...You didn't prounounce that right."

Demyx grinned and reached over the table, flicking Zexion on the nose. "You would know, Smarty Pants."

Annoyed, Zexion lifted a hand, trying to swat Demyx away, but the blonde swiftly grabbed his wrist and pulled him closer over the table.

Demyx's grip was too tight and Zexion couldn't pull away. He suddenly grew flustered, from both Demyx's starin and their close proximity, and hid his face behind his bangs. "_What_?"

Demyx smiled nervously without a response, and cupped his other hand against Zexion's right cheek. It was growing warm, he noticed as he slid his fingertips up to the spiderweb of scars that spread out from the outer corner of his eye, hidden beneath his hair.

For once, Zexion was rendered speechless. He'd always been quiet, but never speechless. He hadn't moved away either, instead bracing his free hand on the edge of the table. He steeled himself, gaze hardening, challenging the blonde. "...I gave up every bit of my being for you, y'know."

Demyx hesitated, nearly faltering, almost losing his chance, almost making Zexion pull away in disappointment and leave forever. Luckily, he was quick to regain himself, quick to match the other's violet gaze. "Then I'll give it all back. Promise... 'kay?"

Zexion quirked a disbelieving eyebrow, resisting the urge to scoff.

"Don't," Demyx hissed, knowing that after all this time, Zexion still felt disdainful. He tightened his grip on the teen's pale wrist and pulled him towards the door, leaving their barely touched coffees on the table, ignoring the harsh protests spilling from Zexion's mouth.

x.x.x

Outside the air was chilly, but the brick alleyway wall that Zexion was shoved up against was rough and warm, as was Demyx's kiss.

It was as though the strength had left Zexion's legs, whether it was from sheer shock, or blatant truth, or the way his heart was pounding in his ribcage.

Lips met and parted, breaths mingled and shook. Demyx pulled back for a moment, eyes falling shut because he was too scared to see the expression on Zexion's face, and slowly leaned in again, lips pressing together. It didn't take too long for Zexion to start kissing him back, one hand tangling in Demyx's collar and the other in blonde locks of hair. One of Demyx's hands went to Zexion's jaw, coaxing him to open his mouth and tongues met, hot and wet and there's was nothing between them except for their clothes and skin and hot air.

"Mm... Zex..." Demyx murmured, pulling away enough so that all they managed were a few chaste kisses.

"So... this was your plan...?" Zexion asked, trying to regain his breathing. "Ask me out for coffee and then make out with me in an alleyway?"

...Not to say that he hadn't enjoyed that.

"Asked you out? Well, that wasn't exactly what I was getting at at first, but if that's what you want, then sure."

Zexion scowled at the pleased grin on the blonde's face and looked down at the asphalt.

"...Zex, you can pretend that you don't want me by your side again all you want, but one day you're going to get tired of pulling that face at me."

The shorter of the two scoffed, dropping his hands back down to his sides. The scent of sea salt from Demyx's hair clung to his skin and made his heart ache. It was a painful, persistant ache, one that he was starting to get used to. He wanted to pull away and just leave, but every memory of his friend (is that what he called him now?) kept him rooted to the spot.

...Like the time Demyx tripped over him on the first day they met, laughing at himself as he picked up the papers strewn across the school parking lot. Demyx diving into the pool, fully clothed, just to retrieve a pair of black framed glasses that he had accidentally knocked into the water. Demyx running to him with a panicked face, blabbering about some math test that he knew nothing about. Demyx trying to win his attention back by serenading him in the middle of the night, guitar in hand...

_"Allow me to exaggerate a memory or two..."_

And he threw that stupid lamp at him...

_"-where summers lasted longer than, longer than we do-"_

And Demyx had chucked it back angrily, the lamp exploding against the side of the house in a shower of glass and metal, and continued singing-

_"And nothing really mattered except for me to be with you... but in time we all forgot and we all grew..."_

Pissed and confused beyond all reason, Zexion ripped another lamp from its socket, this time making its mark.

Now Demyx was leaning in towards his ear, voice soft and deep and Zexion was wondering if that lamp had left a bruise.

"...And I'll even have the courtesy of admitting I was wrong, as the final words before I'm dead and gone..."

Zexion sucked in a deep breath as a pair of arms slid around his waist. He knew Demyx wanted him to give up, give in, submit, but...

"You've never been so divine in accepting your defeat, and I've never been more scared to be alone... If love is not enough to put my enemies to sleep, then I'm putting out the lantern, find your own way back home..."

...But what were the chances of him giving himself up, only to be betrayed again by the person... he loved more than anyone else?

"Zexion, please," Demyx whispered, dropping in his head on the other's shoulder. He would say anything, do anything, anything at all to make him trust him again. "Please don't shut me out... I know I was a dick, so you don't even have to go there, but please give me one more chance. Just accept the fact that I can't stop thinking about you and want to go out with you. Just... just... please..."

Zexion bit his lip, hesitantly wrapping his arms around Demyx's waist, and uttered just one word, one word that would finally change things between them, and life would go on.

"...Okay."

And it was.


	14. 14 : give me what i want

**Finally cranked this bitch out. It did NOT want to be written. According to ****xcassedega****, it was NINETEEN PAGES LONG. In this said font. Anyway, I'll save my rant for the end and let you get on with this...**

**Slight warning: soriku limeade. Beware the sexy. ...And the typos. And keep an eye out for the stuff that seems out of place.  
**

- - - - -- ----- - - --  
**sweet** _talk_ 101

14 : give me what i want - **kids in glass houses**

Following the day after Roxas spent the night at Axel's, the two became absolutely inseparable. Everything after that night became a blur, from Halloween (from what Axel could remember, Sora had reluctantly dressed up as a playboy kitten, courtesy of a hysterical Riku) to Thanksgiving (Simba nearly ran off with the turkey, the crazy little bitch) to Christmas Eve when Axel actually managed to steal a tiny kiss from Roxas under a mistletoe. It was meant to be a joke, but strangely, the confused redhead could think of nothing else afterwards. But there was no way he was actually starting to _like_ like the boy... Right?

Nevertheless, New Year's went by a lot slowly considering Roxas did everything humanly possible to keep Axel away from alcohol and now everyone was stuck in the awkward phase before Valentine's Day. Not much seemed to happen until then and the air hung quiet and lifeless and everyone just moved through it as though they were deep underwater.

"It's almost vacation time," Axel noted at lunch in early February.

"It's almost Vaaaalentine's Day," Demyx sang playfully, nudging his boyfriend in the side while Larxene pretended to gag. Zexion crinkled his nose in annoyance, swatting at the blonde's elbow. Honestly, the only thing he ever cared about on Valentine's Day was the candy. Demyx was determined to change that.

Sora grinned and grabbed Roxas by the shoulders, pulling him away from his redheaded cushion. "And it's almost _our_ birthday!"

"How old are you going to be? Seven?" Riku asked, a slow smirk spreading across his face.

"Seven_teen_!"

Roxas rolled his eyes and ducked out from under Sora's arm, flopping back against Axel's side. The redhead grinned and snuck a sip of the boy's soda.

Kairi sighed, watching her brother and twirling her hair around her fingers. She was trying to keep a straight face. "Axel, Reno called yesterday and said he's coming to visit."

"Ah? When?" he asked, arching an eyebrow. Ever since their older brother went off to college, his visits had diminished and he had become a rare sight around the house.

"Tomorrow."

"Wh-_WHAT_?!" Axel yelped, inevitably choking on the soda and sending himself into a coughing fit. His sister exploded into peals of laughter while Roxas patted Axel's back.

"Wh-why didn't you tell me that last night?! I would've had more time to..." Axel paused and then grimaced once he found his choice of words. "...emotionally prepare myself."

"Because your reaction was worth it."

Now that Axel thought about it, and about his brother, the only thing he'd need to worry about would be... Roxas. If Reno saw the two of them together (which they always were) he'd undoubtedly try to steal his little blonde right from his grasp.

"Ohmygod, Kairi, we need to hide Roxas!" Axel exclaimed, quickly grabbing the confused boy and squishing him to his chest.

_Air..! AIR!_ Roxas flailed and pushed and shoved, finally opting to bite Axel.

"Shit, Roxas!"

_What the fuck?!_ The blonde glared at Axel in accusation, trying to fix his hair.

"Oh, come on," Kairi drawled, rolling her eyes. "He probably already has a boyfriend. Or girlfriend. Or both."

"How do _you_ know?!"

Roxas exchanged an incredulous look with Sora and smacked Axel's shoulder. _Hello? Still here!_

"Ow, Roxas, stop!" Axel snapped, grabbing the boy's hands. "I am _trying_ to rescue you from a future _rape_ attack."

"Oh, with Reno it always becomes consensual," Kairi said, waving her hand dismissively.

Well that caught Roxas's interests. He smirked, waggling his eyebrows.

_...Is he hot?_

"What the _fuck_ is that look supposed to mean?!" Axel demanded, a frown passing over his lips. And what was this strange, overwhelming emotion forming deep inside his chest that made him want to keep Roxas all to himself? "You can't possibly be implying that you're _interested_."

Roxas was suddenly grateful that he couldn't speak because god forbid he actually voiced himself in front of Axel. He glared at him and crossed his arms. _Like you've been trying to make a move ever since that half-assed kiss on Christmas Eve._ He had actually been extremely disappointed when Axel had pulled away from him so quickly. He had just started to enjoy it too. Now, he wasn't even sure how he felt about his friend.

Kairi wondered of she was the only one who could see a sudden tension between the two. Could Axel be... jealous?

"So _what_ if Roxas is interested? You gonna stop him?"

"...I will try with all my power," Axel grumbled, sniffing indignantly. No way in _hell _was Reno going to steal Roxas away from him.

"Aw, c'mon, Ax," Demyx piped up, "Reno isn't that-..." The withering glare that Axel sent his way made Demyx swallow his words and move closer to Zexion out of fear. The violet-eyed teen snorted behind his bangs, finding his boyfriend's sissy reaction downright hilarious.

"If Roxas doesn't get Reno, I'll take him," Larxene said, grinning at the possibility of it.

"You're only saying that because he flirted with you. He flirts with anyone."

"Yeah, at least..."

Roxas sighed and drowned out the conversation. He wasn't trying to stir up a controversy, he just wanted to know what the fuck Reno looked like. Was that so much to ask for?

Kairi left Axel and Larxene to bicker and scooted over so that she was sitting in front of Roxas. "Okay, so basically, if you didn't know that Axel and I were twins and you put Axel next to Reno, you'd think _they_ were twins."

Roxas blinked and gave the redhead next to him a once-over, eyebrows raised.

Kairi laughed and shook her head. "Oh, they still have their differences, don't worry about that. He's really not as bad as we're making him out to be, he just has a habit on hitting on anything with two legs."

Of course, she couldn't really blame Roxas for being more curious than everyone else. Last time she was aware the he had been in a relationship was back at the Academy (from what Sora had told her) and it wasn't his fault for looking for a potential relationship. It was actually Axel's fault from not making a damn move.

x.x.x

By the end of the day Axel had relented, claiming that he couldn't give a fuck as to what Roxas did and with whom and walked home alone in the freezing cold. On the other hand, he was _really_ missing Roxas's heated Camaro.

Axel angrily yanked the collar of his coat up to his chin and went to cross the street, nearly getting run over by a familiar yellow and black car halfway across.

"Motherfuck!" he gasped, jumping back right before the car skidded to a halt. "What the _shit_, Roxas?" Axel lashed out, punching the hood of Roxas's Camaro, momentarily taken over by a temper tantrum.

Inside, the blonde flinched from the impact, his lips skinning over his teeth in a snarl. He climbed out, forcefully slamming the door behind him and stormed after the redhead.

_Why don't you tell __**me**__ what the shit,_ Roxas thought bitterly, grabbing the taller boy by the front of his coat and dragging him to the passenger door. Axel stumbled slightly and grabbed at Roxas's wrist, yanking him away. "What? What the _fuck_ do you want?"

Roxas grit his teeth, practically growling (if he _could_ growl), and shoved Axel against the door. He knew this was only feuling both of their anger but he was already frustrated and Axel's stubborn attitude wasn't helping.

"You little shit, I told you I can kick your ass faster than you can blink," Axel growled, fingers curling into fists.

The blonde narrowed his eyes and stepped back, snapping his hands away from Axel's coat. He lifted his chin and narrowed his eyes in challenge. _Bring it, bitch. _

When Axel tackled tackled him, knocking them both into someone's snowy front lawn, Roxas was hardly worried. A little cold, but not worried. Axel barely made a punch in before Roxas shoved at his chest and kneed him in the stomach, successfully managing to roll them both over. The two boys glared at each other, panting for breath from the sudden rush of adrenaline, until slowly, Axel's expression began to soften. He let out a heavy breath and let his head fall back into the snow, feeling Roxas roll off him.

"Sorry..." Axel mumbled guiltily, reaching out to ruffle the other boy's spikes. Roxas waved his hand dismissively and sat up, giving Axel an impatient look, to which the redhead could make a very educated guess to. He'd been around Roxas long enough to figure out what many of Roxas's looks and gestures meant.

"It's just that..." The words seemed to take a while to come together, like Axel had suddenly forgotten all of his reasons. The real truth was kind of... embarrassing and very ungaurded, but Axel tried anyway. "...I don't know, I love my brother and all, but I don't exactly... uh... _trust_ him. And I don't want him to hurt you, y'know? And you don't even _know_ him yet so I guess I shouldn't be spitting stuff about him before you even meet him..."

Roxas stared at him, at bit lost in thought, before forcing a careful grin and raising an eyebrow. His expression said one thing but his thoughts were elsewhere.

_You're worried about me? That is so fucking cute. Damn._

"Yes, yes, I know you can take care of your own ass. Can we go inside your car now? _My_ ass is _freezing_."

x.x.x

"Thank Jenova above today's Friday. I don't think I'd be able to handle Reno during the weekday."

Roxas chuckled silently and flicked some water at Axel's face.

"Yeah, it's a wonder I can handle _you_ during the weekday."

It was the last period of the day and Axel and Roxas had swimming with Demyx and Naminé. At least... the siblings were the only ones Axel and Roxas were really familiar with in this class.

"Hey, Rox!" Demyx called, waving from the deep end. "Swim some laps with me!"

_God forbid I __**don't**__._

Axel chuckled as he watched Roxas swim over to the taller blonde and hoisted himself up on the pool edge. God, how he hated water. Of course... the class gave him a perfect excuse to ogle at a half-naked Roxas. _Yes_, he _admitted_ it, he _enjoyed_ staring at the boy's chest. Fuck off.

"Keep staring like that and he's bound to notice," said a voice from below, making Axel jerk in surprise. Naminé blinked and giggled, pushing her wet hair out of her face.

"Well, I'm trying _not_ to be so open about it, that's the point."

"Yeah, anymore 'openness' and Roxas might actually, y'know, notice." The petite blonde girl squealed and laughed when Axel kicked up water at her face. After he was satisfied, he sighed and looked away, staring at empty air.

"I just don't think that it'd be a good idea to get involved with him that way."

"Oh? And why not?"

"...It's complicated. I can't really explain."

Naminé cocked her head to the side, lips pursed together in thought. "Is that why you've been acting so weird ever since he showed up?"

"What-?!"

"I mean, well... I know we never talked much before but I watch people a lot. When you were fighting with Roxas? And even before that you were much more... confident. Cocky. Now you're just... all mellow, you know?"

Axel let out a long, impatient breath and raked his fingers through his wet hair. "I just... don't know how to explain."

Suddenly, the small blonde smiled knowingly, as though she knew something he didn't. "That's fine then," she said. She grabbed onto the ledge of the pool and pulled herself out of the cool water. Her back was turned to Axel and he took that chance to rake his eyes over Naminé's body. That two-piece, blue and white polka-dotted bathing suit left very little to the imagination, from her white thighs, to the arch of her back, to the curve of her neck, to her chest.

Naminé was damn attractive. But Axel just wasn't turned on.

Which felt odd.

Because Axel knew he should've felt something. But he didn't. Not that he wasn't into guys but... Roxas? Of all people? And not Naminé, the cutest little thing on two legs?

Pshh. Whatever.

Either way, the only thing he was worried about was Reno getting his hands on Roxas. As much as he told the boy he wasn't going to butt in, he couldn't bring himself to be honest. Like hell was going to let Roxas get eaten alive by his older brother. He just hoped he'd be able to remain conscious for long, considering he had to pick Reno up today, the twins' birthday was tomorrow, Valentine's day was right after than, and finally, vacation.

x.x.x

"No, Roxas, _no_. Go home. _Go_. Roxas! ...Sit!"

Roxas cocked an incredulous blonde eyebrow, expression hardening for a moment.

_What am I? A fucking dog?_

"No, no, don't take it that way," Axel gushed quickly, smiling nervously and placing his hands on Roxas's shoulders. "I mean that I can handle Reno, but I won't if he's all over you, y'know?"

Even as he said it, Axel felt a hot burning jealousy twist deep inside him that gave him the urge to punch something (preferably Reno's face).

Roxas frowned half-heartedly but allowed Axel to pull him into a hug and ruffle his hair.

"Now go on, shoo. I need to track Kairi down."

Roxas crinkled his nose cutely and hugged Axel back before stepping back and letting the redhead sprint off in search of his sister. He sighed and went off to the parking lot, easily spotting his Camaro in a sea of black and white. Honestly, were these people colourblind? He climbed into his car and sat in the silence for a while as other students around him drove off. He felt a little deflated since Axel wasn't sitting next to him, making dirty jokes or talking about anything else that was on his mind. Though... it didn't surprise him how used to he had become to Axel's presence. He'd known it'd happen from the moment he'd met the redhead. He'd never truly hated him, and it was only Axel's initial attitude that ticked him off. Sure, he claimed he had hated Axel with a passion of a thousand and one suns at first, but... but Axel wasn't what he had expected when he saw him.

Of course things changed. He knew they would change. Axel's schizophrenia was proof enough.

The blonde sighed and jammed his keys into the ignition, driving home in an unusually sullen mood. He didn't even kick Riku and Sora when he came inside and went through the living room, and merely passed through as though in a dreamlike state.

"You okay, Rox?"

Said blonde started and whirled around, blue eyes wide.

"Yes, I still know you exist." Sora grinned and nodded for Roxas to come sit next to him. For once, he and Riku weren't attempting to eat each other's faces off and were actually just sitting there, watching TV. Roxas approached his twin but didn't sit down, giving the couch a wary look.

"Don't worry," Riku chuckled, amused by the disturbed face Roxas made, "we haven't done anything."

Yet.

Roxas stood there, contemplating for a moment and finally took a seat on the edge of the coffee table. He crossed his arms, giving his brother a questioning look.

"Hey, don't give _me_ that look, I'm supposed to give _you_ that look!"

Riku rolled his eyes, clapping a hand over the brunette's mouth. "You didn't go with Axel? I thought he'd take you."

_Fat chance. He's gotten so protective of me that he might as well start carrying me from place to place soon._ Roxas cocked his head to the side and shrugged indifferently.

"Oh, right, right, _Reno_," the silverette recalled with a smirk.

_I honestly don't get it. _Roxas shrugged again, heaving a deep breath.

"I think this is what Kairi meant by Axel having a big brother complex."

"More like a _jealous_ complex," Sora sang, waggling his eyebrows.

Roxas rolled his eyes skyward, flicked them off and heading to his room.

"Oh, hey!" Sora called after him, smacking away Riku's suddenly roaming hands. "Mom's working like crazy so she won't be home 'til tomorrow afternoon."

Roxas waved over his shoulder and climbed the stairs to his room. He hardly felt like doing anything. It felt... oddly boring without Axel around, and after staring aimlessly up at the ceiling for half an hour he decided to text Hayner, Olette and Rikku. Fifteen minutes later, he was meeting the three at the nearest McMoogle's, pulling the collar of his coat up over his face as he crossed the parking lot into the fast-food joint.

"Oh, heyyy, _Roxas_, what's up, how's it going, how's the weather-"

A seemingly disembodied arm had flung itself out of the closest booth, yanking the blonde into the red faux-leather bench. Roxas found himself practically sprawled across Hayner's lap.

"Hayner! You're going to suffocate him!" Olette's unmistakable voice went floating over his head.

"That's fine, as long as it keeps _you_ two from opening your _fat mouths_!"

Roxas flailed desperately against Hayner's hold, nearly punching the boy in the eye. After disentangling their limbs he scooted to the far end of the booth, huffing angrily and finger-combing his hair back into place.

"Aw, c'mon, Hayn, he's going to end up finding out anyway," Rikku cooed, trying to swallow back her giggles. "Might as well tell him now, yanno?"

Hayner made such a face that he looked as though he'd been sucking down lemon juice for the past hour.

"Fine!" Olette said, throwing her hands up dramatically. Hayner looked hopeful for a momentary second until the brunette grinned. "So, Roxas, guess who asked him out."

Roxas's eyebrow's shot up in surprise and then furrowed in thought. He pointed at Olette.

"Oh, honestly." Olette chuckled, shaking her head. Roxas gave her a blank look, practically feeling the heat waves emanate from Hayner's body. He was the only one who knew of his best friend's secret little crush. "If Rikku and I are sitting here, what would be the chances that either of us asked him out?"

Roxas sighed impatiently and cocked his head to the side. He hated guessing games and no one else really came to mind... and he was too lazy to think about it too much anyway so he just shook his head and shrugged.

Olette and Rikku exchanged grins while Hayner groaned pathetically from his corner of the booth.

"_Seifer_."

Looking back on the moment, Roxas would never be able to understand how and on _what_ he had choked on, but before he knew it Hayner was thumping him hard on the back and Olette and Rikku were roaring with laughter.

"It's-not-funny!"

When Roxas finally emerged, gasping for breath and clutching at his sides, the girls were in stitches and Hayner looked downright murderous.

"And the funniest... thing about it," Rikku managed through her tears, "is that he wasn't even joking!"

"He was _serious_!"

They dissolved into more peals of laughter, now attracting the attention of every McMoogle's patron.

"I swear, Roxas," Hayner hissed, pinning the blonde down with a fierce glare, "if you so much as _chuckle_... I will _castrate_ you."

Roxas nodded and coughed, throat burning. After that, he wasn't really aiming for a laugh. That, and he was quite fond of all his... parts. He pulled out his Sidekick and wrote

**Wait, then why are you so pissed? Didn't you say no?**

The other blonde grimaced and shifted uncomfortably in his seat, pushing the phone away from him as though it was going to bite him.

_Oh Shiva-_

"He said yes," Rikku confirmed, instantly sobering up. Olette stopped giggling too, even though she was hiccuping now.

"S-sorry, Hayner," Olette muttered, grinning sheepishly.

"Yeah!" Rikku added, casually twirling a braid around her finger. "It's cute, but the fact that it's, yanno, _Seifer_, just makes it hilarious."

Hayner made that lemon-face again, raking his fingers through his dirty blonde curls with such force that Roxas though he was trying to tear his hair out. "Ha-fucking-ha."

Roxas elbowed him in the ribs, giving him a questioning look._Then why the fuck did you say yes?!_

"I don't _know_! I mean, he was being so fucking serious for once that I was too shocked to say anything else..." Hayner trailed off and shrugged offhandedly. Roxas snrked and shook his head in disbelief.

"Hey, hey, Roxas," Hayner said, waving his hand for Roxas's attention. The blonde turned, eyebrows raised and Hayner stuck a ketchup-covered fry to his cheek. "Yeah. That's what I thought."

Rikku and Olette burst into fresh waves of giggles as Roxas tried to force ice cubes down the front of Hayner's pants.

x.x.x

By the time Roxas returned, the sky had turned a dusky purple and the temperature dropped to a stand-still chill. He had to huddle up in his coat despite the fact that he was only a few feet away from the door way. A gust of wind eddied around him, blowing his hair around, reminding him of dark nights and cold dark skies, and Roxas practically threw himself through the front door from the chill that ran up his spine. The front hall was flooded with light from the television. Roxas rolled his eyes, unable to understand how those two could sit in front of the tv for so long. He flicked on the lights and was almost immediately greeted with a girlish scream and pillow to the face.

"_Dammit_, Roxas! Don't scare us like that!"

Roxas dislodged the cushion gently from his teeth and slowly lifted his gaze to the couch, expecting the worst. Thankfully, it was only Yuffie and Selphie, clutching at their chests from fright. The moment Selphie saw who had barged in during their horror movie marathon she relaxed and smiled widely.

"Oh, _Roxas_," she cooed, batting her brown lashes. "Wanna come sit with us?"

The blonde arched a disturbed eyebrow and shook his head, stifling a fake yawn behind his hand. Selphie deflated slightly and pouted, going back to twirling her hair boredly around her fingers. Roxas chuckled silently with amusement, tossing the cushion back at the girls.

"Oh, keep it down," Yuffie warned, her eyes glued back to the television screen where a girl was screaming and trying to cling to the floor as an unseen beast dragged her into the darkness. "I think Riku and Sora went to sleep."

_...Sleep, huh? At eight thirty?_ Roxas grinned to himself and pulled out his Sidekick as he trudged up to the stairs to his room.

**Hey, I'm going to sleep early.  
I'm so fucking exhausted. So  
if I don't reply, y'know why.  
-Roxas**

**Yea sure no prob. Ill see you  
tmorrow early bday boy.  
-Axel**

Roxas shed his coat and shoes and dropped down on in his bed, holding his phone above his face.

**Oh, hell, I totally forgot my  
birthday's tomorrow.  
-Roxas**

**Lmao you would. g'night.  
-Axel**

Roxas flipped his Sidekick shut and set it down on the nightstand. He stretched his arms out over his head before curling up comfortably against his pillow despite the fact that he probably still had ketchup somewhere in his hair. Outside, the cold wind whistled through the naked trees, making him wish for spring. He missed the bright green blanket that covered the town, infusing the air with the scent of summer.

...Like Axel. Axel reminded him of summer. He always had.

x.x.x

When he woke up next morning he was stiff from sleeping in his jeans and his shirt was twisted awkwardly around his torso. Or... no. That was Simba. Roxas groaned internally and shoved the sleeping cat to the other end of the bed, trying to ignore the steady pounding in his head.

...Wait, that was definitely _not_ his head. Unless he was currently hitting his head against a wall and he was sure as _hell_ that that was _not_ what he was doing.

The banging slowly increased in volume and Roxas was forced to sit up and rub the morning gunk from his eyes. He glanced at the clock and wondered in his half-awake state at what the _fuck_ could Sora possibly be doing that would produce such a sound at _six in the fucking morning._

He swung his legs over the edge of his bed and Simba instantly woke up, jumping down from his nest in the blankets to briefly wrap himself around Roxas's ankles before padding away. Roxas smiled and reached out for his phone, shoving it into his pocket as he ambled out of his room and down the hall, concentrating on moving his feet towards his twin's door.

Now, when Roxas shoved the door open, finger raised in accusation, he had expected something out of the ordinary. But for him, out of the ordinary did _not_ mean throwing the door open only to find Sora and Riku twisted in the sheets of the bed with his twin's legs draped over Riku's shoulders, throwing his head back with a keening moan as the silverette steadily drove into him.

It only took a few more moments for realization to set it because Roxas was still rooted to the spot in shock and when Sora finally snapped his hazy blues open, he let out a high-pitched shriek that nearly sent Riku flying off the bed.

"S-sora, wh-Holy _shit_!" With inhuman speed, Riku grabbed the sheets that were now half-hanging off of the bed and yanked them up, pooling them back around their bare bodies. Not liked it _really_ helped though. Roxas had seen everything and the damage was done. The twins silently stared at each other, Sora's face becoming significantly paler as the moments dragged by while Roxas's left eye ticked up a storm.

Finally, Riku decided that he couldn't take much more of this. He'd been happily driving his cute little boyfriend into ecstasy, and awkward moment be damned, he was going to fucking _finish_. He huffed impatiently and threw his bangs out of his eyes with a flick of his head. "I don't know if you guys are having a moment, or _what_," he hissed out, voice straining slightly from the pressure still around his cock, "but I would _love_ to continue. So, if you don't mind, Roxas?"

Said blonde swallowed thickly and then shook his head as if trying to get rid of the bothersome images that were currently implanted in his head. He did an about-face and slowly closed the door behind him, drawing a shaky sigh of relief from his twin.

"...That went better than I expected, to be honest," Sora mumbled, dropping his head back against the pillows he'd been propped up on and let his eyes slip shut.

Riku snorted in a mockery of amusement and dipped his head, brushing his lips along Sora's bitten collarbone and drawing a shiver from the boy.

"H-hey, Ri... c'mon, the mood's ruined," the brunette grumbled, throwing an arm over his eyes. The silverette only smirked in response, his tongue working almost languidly against Sora's skin as his hands skimmed down to wrap around the boy's slim hips. Sora snapped open a curious blue eye at Riku just as the older teen drew his own hips back and slammed forward in one fluid motion.

"O-oh, god...! _Fuck_...!"

"The mood's not ruined until I _say_ it's ruined, So-ra."

x.x.x

**Think I can make an appointment  
to see your therapist?  
-Roxas**

**Y whats wrong?  
-Axel**

**Nothing, I'm sure, that a few years  
of therapy can't cure.  
-Roxas**

**what happened?  
-Axel**

**...Nothing. I just walked in on Riku  
and Sora fucking.  
-Roxas**

**...LMFAO jesus i thought it was going  
to be sumthin worse than that. abt  
time really, i mean even demyx and  
zex did it already.  
-Axel  
**

**I don't really care that they were doing  
it, it was just more of a 'Surprise, your  
brother's getting laid, happy birthday!'  
-Roxas**

**Oh well i can help with that.  
-Axel  
**

**...You sick bastard. I'll be over in fifteen  
minutes.  
-Roxas**

The blonde snapped his phone shut and brushed a hand through his sagging spikes, grimacing when he felt remnants from last night's food fight still in his hair. That... needed to be taken care of sometime soon. He didn't want to walk around, looking like a buffet, after all. Roxas sighed and pushed himself to his feet, stretching out at the top of the stairs and then making his way down to the kitchen. Yuffie and Selphie were already there by the time Roxas stepped in, the former trying to dislodge a piece of toast from the toaster with a fork (because that was a _brilliant_ idea) and the latter dozing off at the kitchen table.

"They woke you up too?" Yuffie asked, giggling when Roxas pulled a disturbed face in response. She gave up on trying to pry her breakfast out of the stubborn device and left it on the counter, going over to hug Roxas instead. "Happy birthday-_why_ do you smell like ketchup?" Roxas only grinned and wrapped his arms around his younger sister, chest trembling with chuckles.

"...I guess I won't ask. I'm not really sure I want to know either."

Roxas snorted softly, lifting a hand to ruffle Yuffie's short hair. He nudged her away, motioning towards the toaster and made his way to the bathroom to get cleaned up. In all fairness... it _wasn't_ fair. It was six, _six_ in the fucking morning. Sora and Riku had the worst possible timing in the _world_.

_Speaking of time, what the hell is Axel doing up so early anyway?_ Roxas thought, narrowly avoiding getting toothpaste in his eye. _The guy sleeps like a rock._ He didn't bother on dwelling on it much longer, instead focusing on washing his face with cold water in an attempt to jumpstart his brain. By the time he left the bathroom, the sun was almost up, casting its weak winter beams of light through the open windows. Roxas ran back into his room to change shirts and grabbed a wool-lined sweatshirt on his way out. His car was cool inside, lit gently by the sun and Roxas suddenly wished that Axel was already in the passenger's seat so that they could go for a drive. He sighed softly to himself, passing a hand over his face. There were so many things he wanted to tell Axel, wanted him to know... but it wasn't the right time. It might never be the right time. But he would wait for it.

He was pleasantly surprised when he pulled into Axel's driveway, only to find the redhead already waiting for him, leaning against the doorjamb with his arms folded tightly over his bare chest and boxers hanging low over his hipbones.

"Yo! Move your ass, blondie, it's _freezing_ out here!"

_Yeah, it'd help if you were a shirt_. Roxas stuck his tongue out and clambered clumsily out of his car, nearly tripping up the front steps.

"What, the two horndogs wake you up way too early?" Axel asked, slipping an arm around Roxas's shoulders to help steady him. The blonde grimaced and shuddered, drawing a chuckle from Axel.

"Wanna go sleep some more before Kairi and Reno wake up?" Axel grinned, adding onto Roxas's questioning look, "I didn't sleep too well."

He shut the door behind them and led Roxas to the couch, dropping down first and reaching out for Roxas's wrist, pulling the boy down on top of him. The blonde didn't seem to mind at all and even shifted around a bit to get more comfortable, his legs tangling themselves with Axel's and his arms looping around the redhead's thin waist. Axel smirked in triumph and tilted his head back against the armrest of the couch. His arms when around Roxas's shoulders and his green eyes slid shut in content relaxation.

He still had Roxas to himself for a few hours before Reno woke up.

x.x.x

Roxas awoke a couple of hours later with a start, blue eyes snapping open and meeting a strangely familiar pair of teal orbs hovering only a few inches away from him, framed with red.

"Yo, Kai! The lovebirds are waking up!"

"Thank god, I thought they were going to sleep until noon."

Roxas leaned up, bracing one hand on Axel's chest and rubbing his eyes with the other, trying to maintain balance as the body beneath him squirmed and wriggled.

"Unf, _Rox_, you've got your elbow in my _stomach_..."

_Oh, don't be a baby_. The blonde huffed and carefully maneuvered himself around until he slid down to the floor.

"Ew... Reno, go put some clothes on."

"I could say the same for you, little bro. Still wearin' pants here."

Roxas blinked and lifted his gaze, his line of vision following a pair of green, plaid pajama pants hangling loosely off pale hips, a trail of red leading up the newcomer's navel and-

...Wow. Was that a six pack? Last time Roxas saw one of those was on Riku.

His attentive blue eyes traveled up, over every muscle, a smooth expanse of chest (lingering for a moment on two dusty pink nipples), a white throat, a smirking grin, and those cat-like eyes, framed with red tattoos and a mess of scarlet bangs.

"See something y'like, kid?" Reno practically _purred_ out, his voice deep and downright dripping with seduction as he cocked a hand on his hip.

_...I see something I like __**very**__ much._

"Please, not in front of me," Axel groaned pleadingly, throwing an arm over his eyes.

Reno chuckled good naturedly and held out a hand, helping Roxas to his feet. "C'mon, Ax. Nothing wrong with a little flirting, right, yo?"

Axel had all sorts of retorts, some of which were probably not even legal. He sighed instead and stretched out on the couch, settling on the least extreme one. "Yeah... whatever." He didn't like the way his older brother was eyeing Roxas, with a predatory gleam in his eyes. He didn't like it one fucking bit. Thankfully, Kairi grabbed Roxas's hand and pulled him into the kitchen before Axel jumped Reno for staring. The moment the two disappeared through the doorway, Axel leapt to his feet and advanced on the other redhead, grabbing him by the hair. Reno winced and bit back a yelp, his own fingers shooting out to tangle themselves deep in Axel's spikes.

"Listen, Reno," Axel hissed out, his green eyes narrowing dangerously as he jerked his hand in his brother's hair. "You stay the _fuck_ away from Roxas, he doesn't need-"

"Need _what_?" Reno asked, his voice infuriatingly calm and a cocky smirk curving his lips. "Did you happen to, yanno, miss the way he was checkin' me out, maybe?"

"Stay away from him, I'm _warning_ you."

"Oh, and what will y'dou if he comes onto me first?"

"I can think of _plen_-"

"Reno! Axel!" Kairi chided from the kitchen doorway, her hands planted firmly on her hips. "What have I told you about incest?"

"Ewww, Kai," Axel groaned, snapping his hands away from his brother and wiping them off on his boxers with a look of disgust on his face. "I wouldn't touch Reno that way even if he was gilded with 24 carat gold."

"Bet you'd touch Ro-"

"SHUT UP!"

Axel socked Reno in the stomach and brushed past his doubled-over form to the kitchen, where he met a very... adorably unusual sight. Roxas was standing behind the kitchen island, adorned in a baby blue apron that Kairi must've forced on him with a mixing bowl clutched in one of his arms. His face and hair were dusted with flour and he lifted a hand to wipe at the bridge of his nose before going back to mixing.

Axel couldn't help but smile at the endearing scene he'd walked in on. "Roxas?"

The blonde lifted his head, a sheepish grin making its way across his face when he realized Axel had been watching him. Axel quirked an amused eyebrow and made his way over, reaching out to ruffle the younger boy's hair and bringing up a cloud of white dust.

"So you two are going to help us make the cake!" Kairi exclaimed cheerfully as she walked into the kitchen, dragging Reno behind her by his ponytail.

"What cake?" Axel asked dumbly, earning himself a light slap in the face, courtesy of Roxas.

"Roxy's birthday cake, duh."

"Oh, right, right..." Reno yanked himself away from Kairi and sauntered over to the island, slinging an arm over Roxas's shoulders and pulling the boy against his side. "Today's blondie's birthday."

Axel growled deeply in his throat, feeling a vein throb angrily in his temple. Only _he_ could call Roxas that and get away with it, _dammit_.

"But I don't know if I could trust you to bake, Kai."

The petite redhead waved a dismissive hand and picked up a couple of white eggs, cracking them open in the mixing bowl. "Don't worry, I've been watching Giada. I know what I'm doing."

The three boys exchanged glances, Axel finally looking away to mutter "You just wanna bang her."

He had an immediate desired effect: Reno burst out laughing, bringing a hand up to his face and Roxas went into a coughing fit.

Kairi shot her twin a haughty look and stuck out her tongue. "Ha ha, you're so funny, Axel. One more crack like that and you'll be wondering how you ended up with a whisk up your ass."

"...Ouch, Kai, that hurts."

"Good. 'Cause the whisk will hurt even more." Kairi smiled innocently at her brother's blatantly disturbed expression and reached for a few more eggs.

Reno chuckled to himself and leaned his elbows against the granite counter top. A smirk tugged at his lips, the predatory gleam returning as he watched Roxas spoon at the cake mix. "Hey, blondie, after this, what say you and I head upstairs and I give you a _real_ birthday gift?"

Roxas froze mid-stir, his blue eyes going wide from shock at the proposal.

"At ease!" Axel snapped, reaching over to yank at his older brother's hair. Reno yelped and smacked Axel's hand away, stalking to the other side of the kitchen to fix his hair back into place.

"...You _both_ embarrass me," Kairi muttered, delicately crinkling her nose. Roxas resumed his stirring beside her, pretending that he wasn't even paying attention to his surroundings.

Despite the so recent and severe hair pulling, Reno was quite amused with his baby brother's stubborn defiance. And so he decided to milk the situation for all it was worth. Because Reno _always_ got what he wanted.

...So he snuck up behind Axel and slipped his arms around his waist, resting his chin on the other redhead's shoulder. "Yanno what I wonder?" he asked, his voice dropping down a couple of octaves and making a shiver work its way up Axel's spine.

"What could it _possibly_ be this time?"

Reno grinned, his eyes traveling over to the little blonde who was bending into the cupboard on the floor with Kairi to look for a cake pan, his jeans working low on his hips and his sweatshirt riding up and pulling his shirt with it. A creamy (and downright biteable) strip of skin was left in its wake.

"I wonder how long it would take me to convince Roxas to bend that cute little ass of his over the nearest counter and let me fuck... him... _cross-eyed._"

...In the end, Roxas and Kairi ended up making strawberry shortcake all by themselves while all Axel and Reno succeeded in making was a giant mess. Sure, Axel had a flowering purple bruise on his jawbone and Reno was missing an eyebrow and half his ponytail, but it had definitely been worth it.

"This is sorta funny," Kairi mused in Roxas's ear as they watched the redheaded pair try to wrestle each other to the floor. "I've never seen them get so violent."

Roxas glanced up from the whipped cream they had been making, giving her an _And?_ look. So what? What did it matter? Why was _he_ supposed to give a flying noodle? Because it so looked like Axel and Reno were fighting over _him_? Was that why? Fighting for _his_ attention?

_...Yeah, like there's much to fight for in the first place. Morons._

Kairi giggled and reached up to tuck a strand of hair behind her ear. It was interesting to see how Roxas reacted, pretending not to notice the two as they tusseled and upended furniture and kitchenware, but every now and then, she would catch him sneaking glances at the bickering redheads.

She sighed in exasperation and planted her hands on her hips, slowly surveying the kitchen. "There is _way_ too much testosterone in this house..."

The two brothers sobered up soon enough, Axel sitting on the counter and rubbing his bruised chin while cursing under his breath while Reno slumped over in the kitchen chair, fingering his cut ponytail with somewhat of a pout. Kairi cast a sidelong glance at Roxas, whose blue flicked back and forth between the two before finally falling away shyly to the linoluem floor.

x.x.x

If there was one strange thing that Axel ever noticed about his brother, it was how when he talked about something serious, he _still_ managed to have a one-track mind. Axel remembered how back when Reno was a senior, he had a really hot substitute, Miss Lockheart something-or-other. She was any guy's (mostly any straight guy's) ideal wetdream material. Dark-haired, fair-skinned, with long legs, a narrow waist, and a large bust. So one day, Reno stayed back to talk about the assignment which he hadn't understood and came home bragging about how awesome her boobs felt.

...Yeah. That was Reno for you.

And it took Axel a bare minimum of 2.4 seconds to realise that Reno was attempting to pull the same stunt on Roxas. Well... partially the same. Because Roxas obviously had no boobs, as far as Axel knew. And he _knew_, because he stared at that gorgeous chest every time they had swimming class.

After cake (which turned out better than anyone expected), Kairi insisted that they watch a movie, and Reno, the sneaky little bastard, plopped himself down on the loveseat and dragged a bypassing Roxas into his lap. Needless to say, Roxas didn't get to watch the movie, but was allowed the pleasure of being mentally undressed for 1.2 hours. Axel wasn't happy. But overlooking the being undressed part, Reno was actually trying to make conversation with the blonde even if his replies came back in the form of a small screen and arial font.

Axel lost the number of times he looked over and felt and overwhelming urge to punch Reno in the face when he saw his bloody brother murmuring quietly to Roxas and tracing circles around the scar on his neck. He lost the number of times he wanted to growl, the number of times he squirmed uncomfortably, the number of times he wished he hadn't quit smoking (_for Roxas, Axel, for Roxas, for Roxas forRoxasforRoxasforroxas..._).

Kairi arched a questioning eyebrow at him and nodded towards Reno and Roxas. Axel only shrugged nonchalantly and looked away, trying to drown himself in the hum coming from the television.

He couldn't bring himself to admit he was jealous. He had too much pride for that, especially after all the shit he'd been through with the kid. He couldn't bring himself to admit that he was noticing things about the blonde that he'd never noticed before.

Like the way his tongue ring poked out from between his pearl white teeth as he bit down on the barbell in concentration. Like the way his blonde lashes cast soft shadows on his cheeks every time he looked down. Like the way there were freckles sprayed across the bridge of his nose that would probably darken in the summer sun. Like the way Roxas's blue eyes lit up like lightbulbs when Kairi finally decided to drag out his present. Like the way a childish grin spread across his face and pulled the bright yellow tissue paper away from a new ZuneTouch (from all of us, Kairi had said) and an x-shaped silver charm that was hiding in the box (Axel's idea).

Something strange flickered over Roxas's face as he held the charm up to his face, watching it spin and shine right before his eyes. Axel didn't have time to register the expression but something nostalgic stirred inside of him, something that he couldn't place, something that nearly awakened the sleeping voice in the back of his head. He didn't have time to figure that one out either because Roxas's arms were suddenly around his waist and his stomach lurched and he thought he was going to be sick.

...Sweet Shiva above. He had fallen in love.

x.x.x

**SO TAKE THAT, BITCHES. I better get some hefty reviews for this one. ((wheezes for breath and starts retyping the next chapter))**

**...Honestly, who's still even READING this?**

**I actually have this all written out... in a notebook, but the little bugger refuses to be written.**

**AXEL FINALLY HAS AN EPIPHANY. AREN'T YOU HAPPY? I'M HAPPY. If you squint really hard at this chapter, at the stuff that almost seems out of place, you will see hints of an upcoming plot twist, which, after reading this whole story all over again, realised that I would be able to fit in quite nicely.  
**

**I just really wanna ramble now and release all my excitement for finally finishing this chapter.**

**You're probably wondering HAHAWHYARETHEYSWIMMINGINTHEMIDDLEOFWINTER? Why? I'll tell you why. Because my school is STUPID and that's exactly what it did to me. Scheduled SWIMMING. In JANUARY. While it was SNOWING outside. Sure, the pool's indoor, but that didn't mean it was HEATED. Oh, they said it was, but they're all lying bastards. **

**I was reading an article on british slang while writing this... because I tend to use british spelling on occasion... y'know, color, colour, realize, realise, stuff like that. And I realised (!) how much british slang we actually use when we write. ...I also found out that foxtrot oscar is a euphemism for fuck off which I found HILARIOUS. .. A lot of funny fuck slang too.**

**And check out my dA, I'm getting ready for coooon!**

**Okay, so um... fuck. I don't know what to say now. You guys all still with me? Still know what's going on? I'll try answering reviews this time, but only for this current chapter. ..Otherwise I'll get confused..**

**So please review? :]**


	15. 15 : bad touch

**WOW HAPPY REALLY BELATED AKUROKU DAY. Sorry guys, I only managed to celebrate it on dA. ((sweatdrops))**

**A little bit shorter than the last chapter, but should be just as satisfactory if not more... I hope. Sorry, it took a while, I don't really have any excuses except that it did NOT want to be written. It gets a little rushed in some places but that's only because I couldn't bear with writing some parts.**

**I looked over this chapter myself because I just wanted to put it up even though it's currently being beta'd... So I'll probably repost this chapter with the beta'd sometime... at some point. For now.. just ignore my typos. Please.**

**On another note... thank you for all the reviews and epic major love : DDDD I tried responding to some of you guys but... uhh... kinda got hard to do once the reviews came flooding in, so thank you to those who I didn't get back to :)**

**Warnings:**** Down there be smut. Major epic smu-NO DON'T YOU DARE SCROLL DOWN AHEAD. READ FIRST. READ FOR THE LOVE OF SHIVA READ-**

- - ---- - - - ---- -  
**sweet** _talk_ 1o1

15 : bad touch - **the bloodhound gang**

"Is this really necessary? It's Valentine's Day and, no offense dear, but I need to be somewhere soon, so you better talk before I leave."

Axel nodded distractedly, pacing back and forth in front of the floor to ceiling windows in Aeris' office like an anxious animal. Aeris sighed and seated herself on her desk, crossing her legs under her skirt. When Axel had called her at seven in the morning saying that it was an _emergency_ and that he _needed_ to talk to her, she rushed to the office without a word.

...And Axel hadn't said a word for the past ten minutes. Aeris was starting to get a bit impatient, despite her nagging curiosity.

Axel finally came to a stop and whirled around to face Aeris, angrily tearing a hand through his bedridden spikes. The brunette quirked an expectant eyebrow at the redhead, who seemed to be struggling with words.s

"...I think I'm in love."

Aeris sat up straighter on her desk, a look of excitement passing over her face. Axel nervously bit his lower lip, stuffing his fidgeting hands into the pockets of his sweatshirt.

"Isn't that... a good thing then?"

"No. Not when it's _Roxas_."

"Aha" was all Aeris said, a strange little grin pulling at her lips. Axel gave her a look, not even trying to _fathom_ what she could be thinking and sank into the couch, gingerly rubbing the bridge of his nose. "I don't know what to do. I mean, maybe if I was _normal_, I'd consider it. But right now... it's just so inconvenient."

Aeris hummed, thoughtfully twisting a brown curl around her index finger. "You have to realize that even your situation won't stop you from feeling the way you do."

"I know, I _know_." Axel groaned and let his head fall back. His apple eyes searched the ceiling above him, as if though the cracked plaster held all the answers for him. "...I'm just scared of hurting him. I'm _so_ scared that I'll... snap, or something, and do something I'll regret."

"Well... maybe he's just what you need."

"...What is _that_ supposed to mean?!"

Aeris laughed softly and slid off the desk, making her way over to the couch and sitting down beside the frazzled redhead. "Think about it. When was the last time you smoked?"

Axel opened his mouth to say that had nothing to do when anything and then paused, eyebrows drawing together thoughtfully. "...Late September? Early October?"

"Yes, and it's _February_." The brunette female grinned and leaned forward, peering up at Axel's confused face with her own happily sparkling green eyes. "I know this is going to sound strange and ironic, but I think that being around Roxas is therapeutic for you. I've thought of it before, but now I'm sure."

Axel looked at her as if though she'd just grown a set of horns and huffed, fidgeting uncomfortably and picking the lint off the couch's armrest. "There's no way this is going to help me. I'm swallowing pills because of him."

Aeris sighed and reached out to place a comforting hand on Axel's shoulder. The boy was a tough patient because she couldn't find the root of his problem. It all seemed to stem from Roxas, a boy who Axel had never even known of before. Sure, he was the brother of Kairi's best friend, but it wasn't like he and Roxas had been _best pals_ or anything. The redhead's past also seemed pretty normal, not counting the fact that his parents were always traveling for their job. And it didn't even seem to bother the redhead at all. It was like the boy was a dead end. Figuratively speaking, of course.

"Axel, we need to figure this out," the brunette murmured softly. She cocked her head speculatively, her bangs falling over her eyes. "You've been coming here for months and I'm still not quite sure why you're like this."

Axel averted his eyes again, muscles tightening over his jawbone. "What's your guess?"

"Well, according to the information you gave me, it looks like Roxas is the trigger. So let's start right there, when you first saw him."

"When I first saw him?" Axel repeated, eyebrows drawing together as he tried to remember. It had been a warm day, the first day of school, precisely. Had it really been only months ago? "...I didn't like him then. And I never talked with Sora before because he sort of irked me. Kairi got along just fine with him and Riku, but I didn't hang out with people like them. They just seemed like rich, snotty stuck ups. And... I don't know. I guess I just assumed that Roxas was that way too. But after I talked to him, I started to like him. That was like, when it started. I liked him okay, but it was like something inside me wanted to keep me away from him."

Aeris had reached for a notebook while Axel was talking and had scribbled down some notes for herself. She knew Axel didn't like it when she took notes, but once she scanned them over, she saw a gap in the dead end. "Sora and Riku? Was there any reason you didn't like them?"

"Nope. At first, I think was just my perception of them, like... y'know? I didn't like them because of what I saw them as or... or something. It was something about them. But... I've been getting along with them just fine, lately."

"So you disliked them without any explanation?" The pen glided smoothly across the paper for one silenced moment.

Axel closed his eyes, listening to the soft scratching sound and something in his memories reared up, like a creature in the dark. Claws scratching against a glassy surface. "...Yeah. Exactly."

"So your problem _does_ stem deeper," Aeris muttered, biting down on her thumbnail as she flipped through her notes. The distinct sound of paper crinkling and heels tapping on the linoleum floor outside the door jerked Axel back to reality. "...But now we're at another dead end."

Axel flicked his gaze away to a little flower pot on the glass table beside the couch. The flowers were in bloom and arching towards the sunny window with their red and yellow petals. "Actually... there's something else I want to talk about... Something I... haven't told anybody else. I tried to block it out, thinking it just a coincidence, but... the day after I met Roxas, I started having weird dreams."

Aeris raised an eyebrow, her hand pausing above her notebook. Dreams had always held meaning, even if it was something subtle, there was always something behind it. "What were they about?"

"I... I'm not sure," Axel stammered out. He felt weak. He felt sick. His stomach was churning and he didn't know what to do because he was _Axel_ for god's sake and he wasn't weak or scared or nervous or... Okay. Maybe just a little bit. "It would be me and him in this dark lonely city or sitting up on this clock tower... y'know, like the one just outside of town? We'd just be sitting there, spending time together. It felt so... _familiar_ that when I'd wake up, I'd feel winded." He paused and licked his dry lips, running his fingers awkwardly through his hair. "Then I started having different ones... Like... Like him leaving me and it would hurt so much after waking up and I wouldn't... still don't know why. After that, it was like something inside me just got... _hostile_. Like it tried to make me hate him even more."

When he looked up, Aeris was muttering to herself, looking thoughtful. Finally, she snapped out of her reverie and jumped to her feet. "Listen, Axel, give me a few days. I need to think, alright? You've told me a lot of important stuff and... I think we're on to something."

Axel nodded and lifted his eyes to meet Aeris', his green orbs narrow and catlike all of a sudden. "Y'know what's funny? I felt like I _knew_ him."

x.x.x

The rest of the day passed by without much event (because fucking Reno took Roxas outfuckingsomefuckingwhere (and yes, Axel was mad)) until Demyx showed up on Axel's doorstep, hand clasped around Zexion's and dirty Converse kicking at the front door.

Axel had barely turned the knob and pulled the door a few inches in before the blonde shoved himself inside, dragging his flustered boyfriend after him.

"Hey Ax, what's up, how's Rox, I heard Reno was here..."

Axel groaned and rubbed the bridge of his nose, really wishing for a tazer. Or lightning to fall from the sky. Anything, really, as long as it knocked the kid out. Axel usually handled Demyx's high energy really well, but that was when he was in good spirits. And with Roxas out with Reno... he was nowhere _near_ high spirits.

Zexion shot him a sheepish smile and Axel returned it somewhat sympathetically.

"-So are you going?"

Axel blinked and scratched the back of his head, trying to remember if he was supposed to be somewhere. The door shut behind him with a _click_ and he followed the other two into the living room. "Uh... what're we talking about?"

"I believe Demyx just asked you if you'll be attending the party this Wednesday night," Zexion repeated in that quiet, smart-boy way of his.

"..._Wednesday_?"

"We're on vacation, Axel."

"...Oh, duh."

Demyx grinned in amusement and dropped himself unceremoniously on the couch, pulling Zexion into his lap. The violet-eyed teen didn't like to be man-handled, but he wasn't going to complain. Demyx was rarely affectionate unless they were around their friends or alone. Being a gay couple in this day's society still wasn't easy.

Axel sighed and made himself comfortable on the coffee table, crossing his legs and leaning back on his hands. "Alright, fine. Humor me."

"Well... it's at Larxene's," Demyx said, pausing for a moment. Axel didn't know if Demyx did it for effect, or to be annoying, or just because he sometimes forgot what point he was trying make. "...On Wednesday. At, like, ten."

"...That's it? You couldn't have picked up the phone?"

Demyx laughed and ducked his head against Zexion's back, peeking out over his shoulder. "Aww, c'mon. You're my best friend. Am I not allowed to check up on you? We haven't been hanging out that much lately, either, so I figured I could stop by."

"Yeah, no thanks to your _boy-toy_," Axel hissed, despite the teasing smile that stretched across his lips. Zexion flicked him off with a smirk that plainly stated_ Yeah, bitch? At least I'm getting laid._

"Fine, fine," Axel sighed when Demyx flashed him his best puppy eyes. He _hated_ when Demyx did that to get his way. He felt _horrible_ for introducing him to Sora. "I'll think about it."

"Awesome! See if you can get Reno to come too, okay?"

Axel grimaced but reluctantly agreed.

"Where is he anyway?" Demyx asked, glancing around as though expecting the older redhead to pop up out of nowhere.

Axel sucked in a deep breath and tried not to twitch. He was starting to wish that Kairi hadn't gone out with Yuffie to meet a couple of Roxas's other friends since being around her calmed him down as of late but... it couldn't be helped now. "He's out with Roxas."

"Interesting," Zexion mused, completely unaffected by Axel's murderous glare. "Considering you two are constantly attached at the hip."

"You know," Demyx said slowly, his ocean eyes narrowing in a rare expression of seriousness, "Ever since Roxas showed up, you've been acting differently." Not that he was jealous, he was just pointing out the fact. It wasn't like him to be jealous.

Axel scoffed and rolled his eyes indifferently. Even if Demyx was his best friend, he couldn't bring himself to tell the kid there was something wrong with him. Not yet, at least. What would Demyx think of him? What would he say? "Don't worry about it, Dem. Okay? I'll see you Wednesday."

x.x.x

"You're worried about him," Zexion observed, noticing the stiff way Demyx held himself as he drove them home.

Demyx lifted a hand off the steering wheel and tore it through his fauxhawk. "Of course I am. He never used to be quiet and... Iunno. Mellow."

"He said he was fine. Don't you trust him? Maybe he's just... growing as a person or... something."

Demyx frowned and grumbled something unintelligible under his breath. Could he really be blamed for feeling concerned?

"Don't get me wrong, I'm not accusing you of anything," Zexion said softly, as though he'd read the Demyx's mind.

The blonde sighed and peered out of the window. Ominous-looking gray clouds had settled over the sky above while the temperature steadily dropped. It would probably start snowing in a couple of hours. Or blizzarding. "Wow... what crummy weather for Valentine's Day."

Zexion smiled, giving Demyx a sidelong glance. "Why, did you have plans?"

"I don't know, but I guess it doesn't matter anymore."

"_Well_," Zexion said slowly, his voice dropping an octave and stressing every letter so that Demyx's spine squirmed. "Kadaj and my parents are out today. I'm sure we can do _something_."

"I don't know," Demyx mumbled uncertainly, despite the way heat flooded his body when Zexion leaned over the emergency brake and started pressing hot kisses to his neck. "...N-nevermind," he gasped out when Zexion gave his pulse point a sharp suck. Driving was starting to prove to be an extremely difficult task especially with Zexion's tongue and teeth and lips working skillfully over all the sensitive areas of his neck. Actually, stepping out of the car was a whole different story. By the time Demyx maneuvered the car into Zexion's driveway, the lilac-haired teen had managed to crawl over the gear-shift and was now straddling the blonde's lap.

Demyx opened his mouth to protest, tell him to wait, but Zexion's mouth was already against his, coaxing the blonde to part his lips. Being with Zexion was sort of like having your world turned upside-down. He seemed like a quiet and shy and overall reserved kid, but with Demyx, the shell broke down. It felt normal, comfortable, _right_... being together. But these feelings were fleeting, likes ghosts of memories, and they didn't bother dwelling on it.

x.x.x

**Hey, you going to Larxene's today?  
-Roxas**

**Yeah duh. why?  
-Axel**

**Wanna come with me?  
-Roxas**

_**Come**__ with you, Roxas? Gaia above, yes-_

**You arent going with Reno?  
-Axel**

**No? What made you think that?  
-Roxas**

**I dunno youve been hanging all  
over him so i just figured...  
-Axel**

**Don't be a baby, it's not like we're  
dating. He just wanted to hang out.  
-Roxas**

_Score!_

**But you like him dont you?  
-Axel**

**So what if I do? Is that a crime?  
-Roxas**

**...nah whatever. Forget i said  
anything. i'll go with you. Gonna  
pick me up or do you want me...  
-Axel**

**I'll pick you up, I still don't trust  
you behind the wheel  
-Roxas**

**Ha ha youre so damn funny.  
-Axel**

x.x.x

Roxas quickly learned that standing in front of his closet with his hands cocked contemplatively on his hips and tongue ring poking out in concentration did _not_ make any potential outfits leap out at him from the dark depths. And unfortunately, he didn't have three little fairies living in his closet either.

He wanted to dress to impress, but not make it look like he was trying too hard. After all, Reno had put more moves on him in one hour than Axel had since Christmas, and he wanted to know just how much the eldest brother was interested in him.

"...Staring at your closet isn't going to help, y'know."

The blonde gasped sharply and whirled around, hand clutching at his chest where his heart was pounding rapidly. Sora and Yuffie snickered at him from the doorway, paying no mind to the middle finger that was flipped their way.

"Want some help?" Yuffie asked, bouncing over to Roxas's bed and flopping down on the soft yellow comforter. "You're gonna catch a cold if you keep standing there in your boxers."

Roxas frowned, but it was more directed towards his clothes than his sister. Well, for starters... he needed pants. Not that walking out in his boxers wouldn't grab anyone's attention... He rifled through the hangers and pulled out a pair of black skinny jeans, holding them out for his siblings' approval.

"Roxas, you bitch, I've been _looking_ for those!" Sora yelped, pointing an accusing finger at his brother. "Get your own pair!"

The blonde only smirked at him and yanked the dark denim over his legs. They were incredibly fitting and clung low to his hips, barely held up by a checkerboard belt.

"...We should tie him up and make him look like a whore," Yuffie said after a moment, propping herself up on her elbows to get a better look.

Roxas shot her a glare while Sora dug around in his closet for a shirt. He sort of wished that his brother went with him, but sadly, Sora was staying home with Riku, Yuffie and Kairi. They were going to watch... Disney movies, or something, Roxas didn't really want to know.

"What if we put eyeliner on him?" Yuffie asked, cupping her chin in her hand and giving Roxas a quick once over.

The blonde's mouth dropped in an expression of incredulity and he shook his head frantically, limp spikes flying around his head. Despite his protest and epic arm flailing, Roxas was, eventually, held down and forced into things that he would rather not speak about in the future.

Twenty minutes later, his blue eyes were framed with kohl, he was wearing a black and yellow shirt, and his spikes were sticking up in an artfully messy way, making it look like he had an adorable case of bedhead. Sora and Yuffie stood back with identical grins on their faces, pleased with their work while Roxas stood up and brushed himself off, grumbling internally to himself.

"Now, see, it'd be so much better if _I_ went with you too. I mean, two hot twins are better than one."

Roxas smirked, giving Sora a disbelieving look. _You? Hot?_

The brunette flicked him off, chuckling under his breath. "Go on, get going, you're gonna be laaaaate."

"For you _daaaaaate-_" Yuffie shrieked and leapt off Roxas's bed, trying to avoid the towel that came flying at her head. "Ew, _Rox_! You were naked in that!" She ripped it savagely off her head and chucked at the opposite side of the room. Roxas laughed silently and grabbed his purple wool-lined sweatshirt from his desk chair, walking out with a wave.

x.x.x

"'Sup, kid," Axel greeted, sliding into the passenger seat of Roxas's car and pulling up the tails of his trench so they wouldn't get caught in the door. Roxas nodded in return and turned his attention back on pulling out of Axel's driveway. The redhead took his chance and gave the blonde a leering once-over, trying not to be too obvious about it.

Just earlier that day Axel had laid down for a nap and dreamed that he had taken Roxas in a white room, in the twisted sheets of a wrought iron bed, with a heart-shaped moon casting its bone-white glow through the window and illuminating Roxas's pale face and his blue eyes, dark and hazy with pleasure and lust as thrust into the boy's hot body and made him scream until his voice went hoarse-

Axel remembered every little detail from his dream, like the color of Roxas's eyes (deep, dark, and navy blue), and the feel of his soft skin, and the warmth of his body...

But the sound of his voice had skittered out of his memories.

He was shaken out of his dwellings by a very-not-gentle punch to the shoulder.

"H-huh, what?" The redhead jumped at the touch and shook his head like he was trying to throw something off. These were not the things he should be thinking around Roxas, dammit! Axel grinned sheepishly, ignoring Roxas's curious gaze, and looked out the window. "We're here already?"

He'd been so wrapped up in his thoughts (though, really, he'd much rather be wrapped up in Roxas) that he didn't even notice the car pull to a stop beside Larxene's house, which was already thrumming with music and writhing with bodies. Roxas had tried to park as close to the driveway as possible but Axel still managed to trip and fall into a snowbank.

"Yeah, yeah, laugh it up," Axel snapped, grabbing the Camaro's side mirror and using it for leverage while Roxas tried to hide his grin behind the silver metal of his hoodie zipper. Axel growled in warning under his breath and burst into a sprint, chasing Roxas up the car-crammed driveway. The blonde slammed himself against the front door, gloved fingers barely inches away from the doorbell-

"Gotcha!"

Roxas gasped as he was crushed against the door and then picked up, finding himself dangling in one of Axel's arms like a sack of potatoes. The blonde huffed angrily and shook his hair out of his eyes. Dumb Axel and his ability to single-handedly lift him up with one... well, hand. The taller boy shifted his prey more comfortably against his hip and gave the door a sharp kick with the toe of his boot. A loud thud sounded from the other side and suddenly it swung open, blasting both boys with hot air and Hollywood Undead.

"Axel, you made-why are you holding Roxas like that?" Larxene asked, snickered at the boy's annoyed expression. She yanked them inside, complaining about the cold, but really, it was her fault for wearing that short black dress.

"Sorry we're late!" Axel shouted over the music, carefully setting Roxas down on the floor. Roxas glared at him indignantly, fixing his clothes back into place.

Larxene shook her head dismissively, her sleek blonde hair shining in the dim light, and passed Axel her bottle of Mike's. "It's fine! I gotta go get more drinks, kay?" She winked at Roxas and brushed past them to the garage door.

Axel rolled his eyes and passed the bottle to Roxas, who immediately downed the rest of the liquid. He set the bottle down on a nearby table and followed Axel down the front hall and into the living room.

_'cause there's no other place that I'd rather be than Los Angeles  
c'mon __**shake**__ it, baby_

Unrecognizable bodies were grinding against each other in what Roxas could only describe as a large, living, breathing _mass_-

_grab a drink, I wanna see you hit the flo'  
you gotta fat ass but you shake it like you ain't a ho_

Axel pulled Roxas through the throng of people to the other side of the room where a black leather couch had been pushed against the wall.

"Hey, Dem, move the fuck over!"

The blonde, who was currently leaning over Zexion's lap and conversing with a silver-haired girl clad in leather, jumped and whirled his head over his shoulder. "Shiva, Axel! Don't scare me like that!"

Axel only laughed in response and shoved Demyx over to make room for himself. There wasn't any room for Roxas, so he simply pulled the boy into his lap, smirking at his surprised reaction when the blonde's ass connected with something... hard. Roxas stared at Axel with wide eyes, looking more than just a little disturbed.

"It's my phone, I swear!" the redhead assured, pulling Roxas closer so that he wouldn't have to yell. The blonde shifted awkwardly, unconvinced, and Axel reached down with a roll of his eyes, yanking his phone free from the confines of his jeans.

"Oh, yeah, that happens to me all the time," Demyx said, narrowing his eyes at his lilac-haired boyfriend. "I _always_ sit on his 'phone.'"

"Yeah, and you _like_ it," Zexion shot back, not missing a beat.

Demyx chuckled, his face darkening slightly in the poor lighting, and gestured at the silver-haired female sitting with them. "Rox, this is my cousin, Paine."

Now that Roxas knew that, he immediately saw the similarities. The height, the shape of the face, the shape of the eyes, even the fauxhawk style of her hair. She smiled (somewhat maliciously, Roxas thought) white teeth flashing behind her dark lipstick.

"Roxy here gave me a nice kick in the balls and got me to hook up with Zex," Demyx exclaimed, shooting the blonde a grateful grin.

"Yeah, Roxas just _loves_ playing matchmaker," Axel cooed, playfully ruffling the boy's hair. Roxas smacked at his hands, trying to squirm away. Paine grinned with amusement and rested her arms against Demyx's and Zexion's legs, leaning closer to the smallest blonde. She and Roxas ended up getting along quite easily (the fact that Paine knew how to use sign language helping _a lot_) and the blonde ended up with a pretty white little card in his lap.

"Paine's in the music industry," Demyx explained upon Roxas's look of confusion. "She-ow!" The dirty-blonde yelped and jumped when Paine elbowed him in the crotch. "_Shit_! What the hell was that for?"

"I can tell him myself. Sorry if I damaged your boy's junk, Zex."

Zexion just crossed his arms and pretended he hadn't seen anything, or heard Demyx's outraged cry of "And I have _sex_ with you!" _Willingly._

Paine only gave her cousin a look, and shook her head with a snort. She stood, stretched, and walked off, muttering something about alcohol and a cigarette. Roxas chuckled to himself and slipped the card into his pocket. He had told Paine how he played guitar and the girl (woman? devil?) seemed pretty interested.

Roxas turned to Axel and then paused, staring at something in the crowd. He had just seen a flash of red in his peripheral vision and he jumped to his feet, intent on following it. And Axel was intent on keeping close to Roxas so he really had no choice but to follow him. The kid looked downright gorgeous that night and Axel wanted to make sure that no creepers tried to make a move on him... including his brother.

He silently followed Roxas through the main room and back into the hallway. He found the found standing the doorway that led to the garage but not making any move to walk in. Axel frowned and walked over, glancing over Roxas's shoulder only to find his older brother pinning some pretty brunette girl against one of the coolers, his tongue down her throat and her hand up his shirt.

Without even thinking it over, Axel grabbed Roxas's hand and pulled him out the front door, slamming it shut behind them. Roxas pulled away almost immediately and slumped down on the porch swing, staring somewhat deflatedly at the snow beneath his feet. Axel bit his lip nervously, but noticed that Roxas seemed more disappointed than angry or hurt. He sighed deeply and ran his fingers through his scarlet spikes trying to come up with something to say. Finally, he just gave a dry laugh and slumped down beside Roxas, his coat dragging snow under the swing.

"Well, that's Reno for ya."

Roxas didn't respond in any way, only sat there quietly and stared ahead.

"Hey, c'mon," Axel cooed softly, slipping an arm around Roxas's shoulders and pulling him close. "Don't be sad. If it's any consolation, he would've gone for you much sooner if he was into you like that."

Roxas lifted his head, giving Axel a deadpan look._ Yeah, that makes me feel sooo much better._ The redhead grinned sheepishly and rubbed the back of his neck. His pulse was racing beneath his fingertips and only then did Axel realize how fast his heart was beating. Realize how close Roxas was. How good his hair smelled. Axel nearly leaned down to burying his nose in those soft spikes and _inhale_ but managed to stop himself.

"Don't look so down, Sunshine," Axel said softly, lifting a hand to comb his fingers through Roxas's honey-blonde hair. "Nothing to cry over." Roxas closed his eyes and leaned into the touch and Axel's heart skipped a beat.

_I'm not crying!_ Roxas protested inwardly._ What am I, four?_

"Hey, hey, look at me, Rox..." Axel slid his hand under Roxas's chin and tilted his head up. When his blue eyes fluttered open, they were clear and curious, wondering what Axel's next move would be (_He better kiss me, the idiot-)_. The redhead took a steadying breath and pressed their foreheads together, smiling nervously.

"You don't have to choose him, Roxas. Choose _me_."

And before Roxas could even _think_ of a way to respond, Axel was already leaning down, capturing the blonde's surprised lips in a soft kiss. And just like that, all the walls they had worked so hard to build, each for their own reasons, came crumbling down.

Roxas threw his arms around Axel's neck and pulled, eliciting a sharp gasp from the older boy's mouth when he ended up falling over the blonde and pinning him to the seat of the swing. Axel blinked down at the beautiful willing boy who was staring up at him with the same hazy, lustful gaze Axel often saw in his dreams. Axel groaned at the sight and leaned down to feather kisses along Roxas's jaw, pressing their bodies close together. He could feel himself harden against Roxas's hip and was relieved when he felt Roxas do the same. The blonde made a hot, breathy little sound (not that he could be vocal even if he wanted to) that sent heat shooting through the taller's abdomen and pushed Axel off of him. Axel sat up in confusion, panting slightly and utterly _not_ wanting to stop. Roxas jumped to his feet and dragged Axel to his car by the collar of his coat. Realization hit him and Axel grinned like the Cheshire Cat before his back forcefully hit the hood of the Camaro and Roxas's lips met his again and...

...And sweet Shiva, they were only making out on the hood of Roxas's cold car, tongue rings clicking together, but already it was so hot and amazing and Axel was aching for skin on skin contact. He wrapped an arm around Roxas's shoulders, pulling him into a deeper kiss and slipped his other hand up his sweatshirt, trailing his fingertips up the boy's side. Roxas gasped softly at the touch and Axel took his chance, plunging his tongue into the blonde's hot mouth. Temperatures escalated and they weren't grinding into each other in the cold February air anymore. It was July and the air sizzled and the pavement wavered and the sun scorched their skin.

Axel groaned into Roxas's mouth as the boy threaded his fingers into his scarlet spikes and _tugged_, making the redhead shiver. It wasn't enough to hurt, but it was enough to stimulate the _fuck_ out of him, forcing him to grind his hips harder against the blonde's. Roxas's breath hitched somewhere deep in his chest and he was suddenly trying to push away from Axel, almost desperately.

"Wh-what, what's wrong?" the redhead gasped out, fixing Roxas with a look of confusion and concern. Roxas felt his heart flutter because Axel... Axel really _did_ care and his features were morphing back into a grin when he saw that his hopefully-soon-to-be-lover was nodding towards the interior of the car.

Roxas jumped off with an impatient huff and dragged Axel to the passenger door, fumbling for the key. Opening the door was proving to be difficult, especially with a pair of hot lips descending over and over again on the back of his neck. Finally, the door yielded to his efforts and and the boys tumbled inside, heads and elbows and knees knocking into various parts of the car as they tried to kiss properly. Roxas squirmed himself into the seat, and grabbed at the lever on the side, making the seat fall back with a loud _craaaank_. Axel crawled in after him, swinging one leg over the blonde's hips so that he was comfortably straddling him and brought his lips down on winter-pale skin once more, worshiping it with summer heat.

A shaky gasp tumbled from Roxas's lips and Axel groaned needily (_he needed __**him**_) against his throat. Fingers tugged at buttons and fumbled with zippers and a black trench coat was flung into the drivers seat along with a purple and black hoodie. Roxas sat up, the muscles in his abdomen quivering with effort, so that Axel could yank off his shirt and the yellow fabric joined the growing pile of clothes while Axel's fingers delicately traced over his skin.

Roxas sucked in a sharp breath when Axel's tongue and teeth found themselves around one of his nipples, hot and biting, and the blonde squirmed helplessly, whimpering in his throat. Almost too quickly, the heat was gone and Roxas's eyebrows pulled down in frustration, his blue eyes staring up into Axel's... hesitant green ones.

"...Fox, this isn't going to work," the redhead breathed out with a shake of his head, strands of red hair tumbling over his shoulders. Roxas wanted to cry, his expression changing from frustrated to confused to downright horrified in a matter of seconds.

_Not going to work?! What's not going to work?! I'm half-naked and you're on your way, there's not much to work __**with**__!_

"My legs are too long."

Roxas deadpanned and then glanced down to where their legs were tangled together, and sure enough, Axel's long legs were backed right under the glove compartment. He couldn't bend far enough to bring his hips down. Roxas contemplated quickly, debating on moving farther up at the risk of dangling awkwardly off the headrest, or...

"Okay, um..." Axel bit his lip, starting to lose focus as he realized the mood was starting to die. Desperate, the blonde beneath him grabbed at his arm and pulled, somehow switching their positions so that he was now straddling the taller teen. Roxas grinned down at Axel's surprised expression, sidling forward so that his knees were on either side of the redhead, hips pressing together.

"Much better," Axel breathed out, hungrily eying Roxas's bare chest. The blonde smirked, feeling bold in his new position. He grabbed one of Axel's hands, bringing it to his lips, and the redhead watched intently as a small pink tongue darted out, tracing the length of his index finger with wet heat.

Axel growled deep in his throat, carnal desire burning like acid in his green eyes. He tugged at Roxas's belt with his free hand, though it turned out to be damn near impossible to do with the way Roxas was sucking on three of his fingers, hot tongue rolling almost languidly around the digits. Axel could've come right then and there.

Roxas finally decided to help out, letting go of Axel's wrist to undo his buckle and snap his jeans open. He was short, so he managed to maneuver himself out of them with ease, dragging his boxers along with them. Axel's shirt joined them shortly, and his pants ended up somewhere under the seat. Not that they really cared about the location.

"Mmm, _fuck_, Roxas..." Axel purred deeply, eyes roaming admiringly down the blonde's body. Roxas blushed at the tone of his voice, impatiently knocking his knee against Axel's hip.

"Hah, calm down Blondie, let me look."

Roxas nearly snarled, punching Axel in the shoulder. _Look later and fuck me, dammit-!_

"Don't give me that look."

_I can give you any look I want, all I-ow, ow, fuck-!_

The blonde winced and squirmed uncomfortably against Axel's index finger. Axel smiled apologetically and hooked his free hand around the back of Roxas's neck, pulling him down into a gentle kiss. Roxas was far tighter than he initially thought and the heat that was just around his one finger was making his cock throb in anticipation.

Axel groaned against Roxas's mouth, trying to keep himself focused on preparing the boy. "Does it hurt?" he murmured, breathing out a laugh when Roxas mouthed out _weird_.

"First time, huh?" Axel asked, distracting the younger boy momentarily so that he could slip in another finger. Roxas nodded somewhat nervously and glanced down at his friend (boyfriend? lover?) with a worried look in his eyes.

Axel grinned and ducked his head, littering kisses down the blonde's neck and slowly working his fingers into the boy's entrance. "You're actually my first, too. So don't worry." The skin beneath his lips shivered and Axel tilted his head back to look at the sweat glistening skin, the damp bangs sticking to flushed cheeks, the shy acceptance in those bright blue eyes.

Soundlessly, they moved closer until their lips met. Roxas's hips suddenly jerked when the other brushed against his prostate and he let out a shuddering breath of air that set Axel's skin on fire. And when the blonde finally settled himself over Axel's hips, smoothly sinking his body down on top of the other's, Axel wondered if he had ever felt this way even once in his life. Everything about Roxas was amazing. The way he moved, the way he looked, the way he looked at _him_, the way he felt-_oh god, the way he felt._

Roxas fumbled for Axel's hand and lifted it to his chest, right over his pounding heart as he rose up on trembling thighs before letting himself fall-

_Two bodies, twisted together in a blindingly white sheet-_

Axel threw his head back with a deep moan, his other hand coming to rest on Roxas's hip, guiding himself against what the blonde wanted most-

_A pale back in the moonlight, skin shimmering with sweat and __**heat-**_

Their shaky breathing melted together with the occasional curse or groan from Axel and Roxas leaned down to press their lips together, mouthing something against him-

_Arched backs and throats and keening moans and rocking hips-_

Axel gasped out, fingers marginally tightening their hold on Roxas's hip when he felt what the blonde was trying to say. "_I love you, Axel..._"

_Desperate touches on shuddering skin and searching lips-_

_It was their way of feeling. As beings who were only shells of people who once were, it was the only way they could stir up the memories of emotions until they could almost feel them on their skin, just the way they felt each other._

"_Rox-as_...!" With a final thrust, the heat below his stomach exploded and the world went red and white.

x.x.x

When Axel woke up, the windows around him were gray with fresh snow and Roxas was a warm weight on top of his chest. Axel shifted his shoulders in a stretch and glanced down at the boy who was sleeping soundly on top of him. He couldn't remember waking up, so it must've been the blonde who had dragged his coat over both of their bodies. He grinned and lifted a hand, running his fingers through Roxas's messy spikes. The blonde squirmed slightly at the touch, slowly starting to wake up.

The best part about it was that it didn't feel weird to wake up this way. There was no morning-after awkwardness, because Roxas was dragging himself up to peck Axel on the lips. The redhead let out a relieved hum, winding his arms around the boy's shoulders. "Mmm... morning, Rox."

Roxas grinned and ducked his head against Axel's shoulder, wriggling with what Axel could only describe as happiness. He couldn't help but laugh, feeling as though a huge weight had been taken not only off his shoulders, but off his chest as well. Axel buried his nose into limp blonde spikes, inhaling the scent of vanilla and sex and Roxas let out a content sigh, relaxing in the other's arms.

_Taptap._

The boys blinked at each other, frowning in confusion as the tapping sound persisted. A spot of light appeared on window beside them and a pair of familiar green eyes peered in.

"Hey! Get inside! I'm not gonna call the ambulance if you two morons catch hypothermia!"

After much scrambling for clothes and bumping heads and knees and elbows, Roxas and Axel stumbled out of the car, the former looking far more uncomfortable than the latter. Larxene was standing there, giving them raised brows and a knowing smirk, glancing over the hickeys on Roxas's neck and the bite mark on Axel's collarbone just, barely concealed by his coat. She shook her head, following her own footprints back up the snowed in driveway.

"Come on, boys, go hop in the shower!"

Roxas's shoulders slumped, a weak little grin passing over his face. _Oh thank god, I feel disgusting._

Axel chuckled at the expression on the blonde's face and helped him up the driveway, finally giving up on waiting for Roxas to walk without flinching and picked him up. Demyx and Zexion were curled up on the couch inside, tired after spending half the morning helping Larxene clean up, but the moment they saw Axel step inside with Roxas in his arms, they both broke into a chorus of _"Sweat, baby, sweat, baby sex is a Texas drought, me and you do-"_

Axel smirked, practically feeling Roxas's whole body heat up in his hold. He rolled his eyes and continued down the hallway, carrying Roxas into the bathroom while Demyx and Zexion's voices followed them.

_"-and I bet you'll feel nuts! Yes, I'm Siskel, yes I'm Ebert and you're getting two thumbs up-"_

"SHUT UP! Especially _you_ Demyx, you're poisoning Zexion's mind!"

"My mind was already poisoned, sweetheart-"

_"Comin' quicker than FedEx, never reach an apex, just like Coca Cola stock you are inclined to make me rise an hour early just like Daylight Savings Time-!"_

Larxene threw her hands up in defeat and followed after Axel and Roxas. "Here, give me your clothes, I'll put 'em in the washer and dryer."

Axel set Roxas down carefully on the sink edge and began stripping in front of her without another word. Roxas gave the blonde girl an incredulous look when she expectantly held out her hand.

"C'mon, kiddo, you too. Nothing I haven't seen before."

Roxas blushed darkly, just on the borderline of feeling a _bit_ mortified after being requested to take his clothes off by one of Axel's best friends right after he was fucked senseless. Either way, he complied, because Larxene was known to do some scary shit if she didn't get her way, and soon enough she walked out and shut the door behind her.

Roxas locked the door for good measure while Axel twisted the taps for the shower. It took only seconds for the sound of water shattering against porcelein to break the silence. Axel climbed into the shower stall and peered out from behind the frosted glass door, holding his hand out.

"You comin'?" he asked, smiling softly.

The blonde chuckled to himself and took Axel's hand, allowing himself to be pulled inside, flush against the redhead's chest. His arms immediately went around the Axel's waist, head resting against his shoulder.

"Hey, Roxas?" Said blonde lifted his head, blinking up with curious blue eyes. Axel smiled back down at him, his own green orbs bright and warm and lifted a hand, pressing it against Roxas's cheek. "I love you, too."

It wasn't that he was joking, because it was true, he _did_ love the boy... but the way Roxas's face went cherry-red with rushing blood was priceless.

x.x.x

**I think it's sad that the only part I'm **_**truly**_** satisfied with in this chapter is the sex. I'm a bad bad bad bad person ;D**

**Only a couple more chapters left! Plot twist coming up soon! ...Well, this story didn't have much plot to begin with, so I suppose... ((shrugs))**

**Review if you loved : D**

**...Please? I WILL BAKE YOU ROXAS SHAPED COOKIES.**


	16. 16 : my blue heaven

**hope you guys are okay with a bit of skipping. there's not much more to write in, except the actual events and the end of the story : D ...that, and this has been self-beta'd and friend-beta'd and i'm still waiting on another beta and ugh. i just got tired and posted this so... if there are any typo's you guys come across, tell me.**

**ps. sorry this took so long. augh. i haven't updated in months, but this chapter literally only took me like... a few days to write, if you put all that time together. man. i need to organize myself better and not write like.. 20 fanfics at once. and cowrites. hahaha. GO LOOK AT THEM.**

- - ---- - - - ---- -  
**sweet** _talk_ 1o1

16 : my blue heaven - **taking back sunday**

Sora sighed deeply and leaned over his desk, shutting off his computer monitor for a few minutes. He tended to have a really short attention span when it came to things like studying for tests and writing essays, and it was better if he took periodic breaks.

"Hey, Riku?"

The silverette looked up from where he was scribbling notes in unimaginably tiny print on a note card and brushed his hair out of his eyes. "What is it?"

Sora frowned and cocked his head to the side, reaching up to tug thoughtfully at a lock of hair. "...Do you believe in reincarnation?"

A terribly thin silence stretched between them as Riku stared at unblinkingly at the boy. Sora wasn't really known for asking deep philosophical questions, and he was momentarily caught off guard. Like watching a duck that couldn't swim. Y'know. "You mean like... a human soul transferring into another body in the next life, stuff like that?"

"Yeah, something like that," Sora mumbled, grinning a bit sheepishly at how silly he sounded.

"I... guess so. Why?"

A sigh. A ruffle of sun-stained, honey-brown spikes. "This is going to sound really weird but... but when ever I'm around you, I get this great sense of finality. N... no, Riku! Don't give me that look!" Sora laughed and shook his head, grinning reassuringly at Riku's worried expression. "I didn't mean it like that. It's more like _finally, about time_."

Sora found himself being stared at once again for a long silent moment, until his boyfriend was unable to contain his snort. Riku leaned across the bed and stretched an arm out, grabbing Sora's hand and dragging the boy into his lap. "You are way too cute."

"It's true!" Sora protested, twisting around in Riku's lap until his knees were on either side of his hips.

"I never said it wasn't. It's very interesting though, I have to say. I guess you're saying that maybe we knew each other in a past life?"

Sora shrugged a bit awkwardly and ducked his head against Riku's neck, inhaling the scent of his cologne. "It's strange though. Normally people aren't aware of these things, are they...?"

"No. Not usually," Riku muttered, running his fingers through Sora's disheveled spikes and feeling the boy relax against him. "I mean, I've never seen people running up to me yelling about knowing me in a past life. But I guess... it's possible. The human soul and heart are both complicated entities..."

Sora pulled away and cocked his head to the side, eyes so wide and so blue that the first thing Riku thought of was an ocean owl. The second was the bright sunshine, bouncing off ocean waves, cradling white foam around a chain of tiny star-fruit islands.

"...You need to stop hanging out with Zexion. I don't know what you're talking about half the time."

"Babe, I think it's _always_ been that w-ouch! Jerk!" Riku grinned and blocked the second blow, bursting into laughter when Sora shoved him down on the bed and made a half-assed attempt at a fight.

"_You_ need to stop hanging out with Axel too, you cocky b-mmph! _Mmm..._"

x.x.x

Roxas let out a sharp gasp before his arms and legs gave out, and he collapsed into his bed as his orgasm washed over him, face first into the pillow. The body behind him shifted and pulled away, landing into the adjacent spot, and tugged the blonde into his arms. The window had been cracked open just a slight, and the spring breeze wafted through, cooling feverish skin and offering a breath of fresh air.

"Feeling better?" Axel hummed, burying his face into the back of Roxas's neck.

After complaining to Axel for about the umpteenth time that he had a cold, Axel had texted him back, saying that he had a proven natural remedy to help cure him faster. Obviously Roxas agreed to it, and before he knew what was happening, Axel had backed him into his room again, hands trailing almost desperately against his hot skin.

The blonde breathed out a laugh and twisted in Axel's arms, gently pressing their lips together. _A bit._

Axel grinned against him and slid his hands down the boy's bare sides, to his waist, and pulled him closer. Roxas let out a content sigh, pressing back against Axel's warm body and relaxing for a few minutes. Neither of them really wanted to move much, but Roxas finally stretched out, reaching for his phone. Axel opened one eye and glanced over the blonde's shoulder, at the small calendar he was scrolling through on the screen. It was only the beginning of April (wow, had they really been together for only two months?) but Roxas had gone ahead to June, where the twenty-first was highlighted in red.

"Mmm... just a little while longer left now, huh?"

Roxas nodded, blue eyes fixated on the screen. He'd been doing this every day since the end of March, reaching for his phone and checking the calendar. Over and over again, like a ritual.

Axel smiled and lifted a hand, soothingly stroking the hair on the back of Roxas's head. "Don't be nervous," he murmured, having spent so much time with the boy already that he could not only tune into what he was probably trying say, but how he felt too. It didn't take much. The look in his eyes, the marginally quickened breathing, the tensing of his shoulders making visible lines on his skin... "There's no point in thinking about it now."

There was no response except for the sound of clicking keys. Minutes later, Roxas reached back, holding his phone out. Axel sighed and took it, propping himself up on his elbow.

**I know. And you know I don't tend to worry much but it's making me really nervous. What if something goes wrong? What if my windpipe gets damaged or they break something else instead of fixing it. And what if they can't fix it at all? I mean, I've been thinking about the surgery and trying to brush it off because I tend to get my hopes up because I always tend to do that but what if it doesn't work..? Then what?**

A twinge of worry cut through Axel's chest and he closed his eyes for a moment, forcing it away. "I know, babe. But you have to remind yourself that this is the 21st century we're living in. Not the middle ages where... where they'd probably stick leeches on you and hit you over the head or something."

That was enough to coax a tiny laugh out of Roxas, even though the redhead couldn't hear it.

"Doctors know what they're doing. Otherwise, they wouldn't be doctors. Right? Besides. I'll be right there for you, from the second you step in to when you wake up."

Roxas didn't move for the longest time before finally rolling over and burying himself in Axel's arms, hiding his face in the redhead's neck. Axel smiled and gently ran a hand down the boy's back, trying to ease his shivers. "I love you, okay? I really, really do. You make my heart pound like I've just run a mile."

Roxas couldn't help but grin and lifted his head, pressing his lips to Axel's throat. _I love you more than you can possibly know. I always have. And I'm sorry things had to turn out the way they did. But everything's okay now. So maybe... maybe I'll tell you later. In two month's time. I promise._

x.x.x

"Oh, come off it, Roxas! Do you want me to carry you out the door?" Sora arched his brows, hands planted on his hips, and tapped his foot impatiently against the concrete. Roxas stared at him from the doorway and shook his head vigorously, spikes flying wildly around his face. "I'll just call Axel and tell him to meet us at the _hospital_, like _everyone else_."

The blonde scowled and shook his head again, crossing his arms stubbornly over his chest. Axel had just recently started driving again, and was insistent on driving the blonde to the hospital. And Roxas was too nervous to go with anyone else anyway and refused to step out of the house without him.

His brother sighed and glanced over his shoulder, to the car that was idling in the driveway. "He's not coming, mom."

Satsuki stuck her head out of the window with a frown, followed by Yuffie, who was wreaking her usual havoc in the backseat. "Honey, let's _go_. Axel will get there when he gets there."

Roxas scowled and waved his hand, motioning for them to go.

Sora shrugged and sighed, hopping down from the porch. "Alright, whatever. We'll be waiting for you, kay?"

Roxas nodded and grinned, trying to swallow down the lump in his throat at those words. They hadn't struck him in the most reassuring way, especially considering the way his memories stirred at the slightest prod as of late.

Satsuki gave her blonde son a firm look from behind her sunglasses. "Don't take too long, okay, sweetie? And make sure Axel drives carefully."

"_Yes, mom_," Roxas mouthed with a smile, watching as the car pulled out of the driveway and slowly drove away from the house. He sighed softly and stepped outside, shutting the door behind him and sitting down on the front steps. His blue eyes scanned the street, fingers nervously pulling at the charm that hung from his neck. The surgery wasn't the only thing he was nervous about. When he got his voice back (_if_ he got his voice back), he made plans to tell Axel everything. About him, about them, even about why Axel was the way... that, well, he was. It was a slightly frightening thought and he just hoped that he could get to Axel first, before his... _schizophrenia_ went out of control. Not that it could technically be called that.

_And not that anyone else knows that_, Roxas thought with another sigh, leaning back against his front door. _If he breaks first, then I might not be able to get through to him. And we'll end up at square one again. And I can't afford to let that happen..._

"...xas! Hey, Fox! Wake up!"

Roxas jumped and jerked away from the door, almost toppling off the porch. His blue eyes snapped open, taking in the sight of Axel stepping out of his blue BMW and crossing the front lawn to him. He had that usual cocky smirk plastered on his face, an eyebrow arched, as if though he just caught Roxas doing something he shouldn't have. That look always made Roxas feel like a childish troublemaker, even if he did like it, but there was something off with it today. Almost like he put in on just to look normal. He didn't bother dwelling on it too much and jumped up from the steps throwing himself into Axel's open arms.

"Hey, kiddo," Axel murmured, sliding his arms protectively around the blonde's waist and burying his nose in the boy's blonde spikes, inhaling his scent. "Did everyone already leave?"

Roxas nodded and leaned up, pressing his lips to Axel's and tugging him nearer. _I was waiting for you._

Axel hummed happily, his grip on Roxas's waist tightening, and deepened the kiss, tongues sliding together for a brief moment. Fingers gripped harder and bodies pressed closer, warmth enveloping skin into one until they reluctantly pulled away from each other. Roxas looked up at him with hazy blue eyes and Axel matched the look, the corners of his mouth lifting up into a smirk. "Don't get carried away, or we'll never leave. C'mon, you ready?"

"_Yeah_," Roxas mouthed, letting Axel take his hand and lead him to the car.

"So, um. I kind of got you a present," Axel mumbled with a shy smile after they got situated in their seats. Roxas blinked in surprise and then smiled, waiting as Axel twisted around and rummaged through the bag in the back seat. Out of the bag came a fluffy chocobo plushie, with large blue eyes and a plush heart on a red ribbon around his neck. The blonde almost melted when Axel handed it over, and clutched the toy bird to his chest with a silly little grin. "I take it you like him? Heh, good then." Axel leaned over, kissing Roxas gently and then leaned down, pressing his lips to the scar on the side of the boy's neck before pulling away and shifting the gear into drive.

It was only then that Roxas realized how much had changed between them, from the first time they met until they were so comfortable around each other that it was like a second nature.

_Back to the way things were supposed to be_, Roxas thought to himself.

"You ready?"

x.x.x

"_Rox_as!"

The blonde gasped in quickly, the breath suddenly knocked out of him when Rikku practically tackled him into the floor, her arms tight around the boy's neck. "Mmmm, we've been waiting for, like, _ever_!"

Roxas squirmed in the girl's arms, glancing over her shoulder. Not only was his family there, but so were Riku and Kairi... and Olette and Hayner and Larxene (filing away at her nails) and even Demyx and Zexion. Satsuki was currently over at the front desk, filing out forms and signing papers.

"'Bout time," Hayner grumbled, sinking in his chair with a pout. "I thought Olette was going to have a panic attack if you arrived any late-ow!"

The brunette girl grinned innocently and crossed her legs. "Sorry, my foot slipped."

"How about I slip my _fist_?"

"... So how are things with you and Seifer?"

"Fuck. You."

Roxas grinned at his friends and pulled away from Rikku. She waggled her brows at him and leaned down, lips to his ear. "So that hot red-headed chick is Axel's sis?"

The blonde nodded and looked Rikku up and down. _But I don't think she's into girls._

"Oh, I'm sure I can change th-"

"Roxas, honey, can you come here for a moment?" Satsuki motioned for Roxas to come over, a tall blonde-haired man in a white coat standing at her side. Roxas took in a deep breath, his stomach twisting uncomfortably, and glanced down. Axel smiled and reached for his hand, threading their fingers together, obviously not caring as to what anyone else thought. It was enough to calm Roxas down significantly and the boy walked over, Axel at his heels.

"Baby, this is Dr. Ansem. He's the one who will performing your surgery."

A look of surprise passed through Roxas's eyes and was gone almost immediately. He held out his hand and smiled in greeting.

"Pleasure to meet you, Roxas," the man said, with the same British accent that Roxas remembered all too well. "I think I should inform you that your friends and siblings each threatened to hurt me in various ways if you died, and I can assure you that you are in good hands." He said it so seriously that Roxas couldn't help but laugh and grin over his shoulder. "Ah, and... who is this?" Ansem looked over the frame of his glasses, his eyes fixed on Axel.

"His boyfriend," the redhead replied with a smirk, and Roxas heard the undertone of pride in his voice, making his heart ache.

"Ah, well, don't you worry either." Ansem smiled, the action much more kind than what Roxas remembered. "He will be sleeping the whole time. Won't feel a thing, I can promise you that. Now then, if you will just let me have a word with your mother, and then we can get things rolling."

_Sleeping... the whole time? That sounds familiar too. _Roxas swallowed thickly, starting to feel sick from his nervousness, and nodded. _Oh god, ohgodohgodohgod, I'm gonna throw up..._

Satsuki winked him and pushed him to the back of the waiting room with Axel.

"Wow, Rox, you look green," Yuffie piped up happily, earning herself a glare from her brother.

_Thanks, Yuff._

"Oh, don't give me that look. Here, this'll make you feel better." She reached into her pocket and pulled out a peppermint candy, pressing it to Roxas's lips.

"So, nice chocobo, Roxas," Zexion hummed, nodding at the toy that was still clutched in Roxas's arms. The blonde looked down and promptly turned red, having forgotten that he was still carrying it around.

"Zeeex, how come you never get me stuffed chocobos?" Demyx whined, tugging at his boyfriend's arm.

"I didn't know you liked chocobos."

"I _don't_."

"...Huh? But, then... wait. _What_?"

Roxas grinned and rolled his eyes, letting Axel pull him into his lap after he sat down in an empty chair.

"Okay, so," Kairi started, leaning forward in her chair and effectively capturing everyone's attention. "Rox, Ax, you need to help us. We're stuck between sushi, and chinese."

Axel raised an eyebrow, resting his chin on top of Roxas's head. "What are we talking about again?"

"Well, we need to _celebrate_ when Roxas gets out the hospital, moron. Come on, get with the program."

"Okay, I'm all for the sushi," Hayner spoke up with an excited grin. "It-ow! Why the _fuck_ do you constantly have to _hurt_ me?!" He glared at the girl sitting behind him, gingerly rubbing his arm.

Olette shrugged with a smile. "Because you never fight back. And Land of Dragons would so out-do sushi."

"Are you serious? Atlantica Sushi is the _best_."

"Okay, whoa, hold up. We are _not_ eating dead _fish_," Demyx spoke up, narrowing his eyes at Hayner.

Riku rolled his eyes, looking utterly annoyed. "You know that they have sushi without fish, right?"

"...They _do_?!"

"...Yes, Sora. They do."

"Hah! Even _I_ knew that."

"No you _didn't_!"

Larxene slammed her nail-file down on the arm of her chair and everyone jumped, heads whipping in her direction. "...If we are eating anything... then we are going to eat steak."

Roxas laughed to himself and shook his head, leaning back against Axel's warm chest. He was slowly started to feel a lot better, especially from the way his friends were bantering over food like a bunch of small children. And _especially_ from the way Axel's fingertips were gently stroking his sides, lulling him into ease. He turned back and pressed his lips to Axel's when no one was looking, mouthing "_I love you"_ against his lips.

"Mmm.. love you too, babe. I'll be right there when you wake up."

"Roxas?"

The blonde jumped in Axel's arms and pulled away, finding Ansem standing behind him with his mother. "Are you ready?"

x.x.x

"Oh, Axel. What are you doing here? I wasn't expecting you today..." Aeris frowned in confusion and brushed her bangs away, lifting her eyes from the pile of papers that were spread across her desk. "Axel?"

The redhead closed the door behind him and locked it before crossing over to the couch and wordlessly sprawling himself face first into the cushions. From what Aeris could see, he didn't look too well; his skin was pale and covered with a fine sheen of sweat and his fingers were shaking slightly. He looked sick, and it sent off warning bells in Aeris's head.

"...Axel? Honey, are you alright?" She pushed away from her desk and walked over to the couch, kneeling down on the floor until her skirts puffed up around her legs. "What are you doing here? Aren't you supposed to be at the hospital with Roxas?"

"I was," came the muffled response. "He's in surgery right now. And I needed to see you."

Aeris frowned in concern and tilted her head to the side, lifting a hand to run her fingers through Axel's spikes. "What's wrong? Did something happen?"

Axel sat up so abruptly that Aeris almost fell back on the floor, green eyes darting around the room. "The meds stopped working. I can't block out his voice anymore."

"..._His_?"

"Yeah. His." Axel sighed shakily and passed a hand over his face. "As in, my own."

"Axel, are you sure-"

"Yes, I'm fucking _positive_ it's not just _me_ thinking! Dammit, I don't know what to do! I couldn't stay there for another minute even if I wanted to, he was literally driving me crazy! I can't... I can't fucking keep my control anymore..." The muscles in the redhead's jaw tightened and he tore a hand through his hair, breath coming in short, quick gasps. His head was throbbing, vision spinning-

_He left you, you didn't __**matter**__anymore to him-_

-he was sure he was going to be sick-

_-you meant nothing, and he wouldn't listen to you anyway, he would never go back with you-_

_-_and it was like something dark was trying to writhe its way out of his chest, crawling through his veins-

-_worthless brat, you sacrificed yourself for him and he left you, didn't even try to listen, all this "I'll be waiting for you" bullshit doesn't mean anything because he'll just destroy you again-_

Axel pressed his palms against his eyes, fingers winding into his fiery spikes in an attempt to stabilize himself, calm down, _anything_, because it felt like the world was spinning out of control and he was going to disappear from existence if it didn't _stop_-

-_you have a heart now, you should understand the feelings that were so foreign to you then-_

It wasn't even the fact that he was _feeling_ them in the first place. They were _overpowering_ him, drowning him and crushing his breath-

-_he'll just bring you more pain, you don't need him, you don't need him__**youdon'tneedhim**__-_

He could vaguely hear Aeris's soft voice, shaky and concerned, her fingers gently tracing the outlines of his face. He kept hearing _calm down_, spoken over and over like a mantra, and for a few precious moments, he blocked the voice out (the voice that was so much like his own) and opened his eyes, dull and dark green. He felt like he was dying somewhere inside.

"There, there, it's alright..." Aeris brushed the back of her hand against his cheeks, and only then did Axel realize he had been crying.

The redhead sucked in a slow breath, trying to regain a normal breathing pattern, and looked up, staring around the room in shock. Aeris blinked and straightened out, following his gaze and let out a soft little gasp, fingers fluttering to her mouth.

All the flowers in the room were blackened, burned to frail skeletons.

x.x.x

Roxas breathed in and crinkled his nose, taking in the scent of that unmistakable hospital smell. Something was beeping softly, rhythmically to the side, offset by a set of synchronized breathing on the other side. He opened his eyes, blinking quickly against the morning light that streamed in from the window and carefully turned his stiff neck. A loveseat had been pulled up right to the edge of his bed, and Sora and Yuffie were curled up against each other in the cushions, sound asleep with their heads resting against each other's.

_Huh..? Where's... Axel?_

He leaned up slowly on his elbows, feeling dizzy and just a little bit weak, and waited for the spell to pass before reaching out and nudging his brother's knee. Only then did he notice the IV that was taped to his arm.

"Mnn... quit... wrigglin', Yuff..."

Yuffie frowned and punched Sora sluggishly in the side, not even bothering to open her eyes. "I didn' do anythin', stupid..."

Roxas found himself smiling slightly and then remembered the reason he was laying in a hospital bed in the first place. Well, he supposed that now was a good a time as any to try it out.

So he licked his dry lips and took in a deep breath. His voice was soft and hoarse and cracked from years of disuse, but it was _definitely_ Sora's name that left his mouth.

The aforementioned brunette's eyes snapped open and he practically bolted upright in the chair, nearly dislocating Yuffie's jaw with his shoulder. "R-roxas..!"

"Nngh.. Roxas? He's awake..?" Yuffie blinked sleepily and stretched out, rubbing her eyes.

Roxas grinned widely at his siblings, barely having enough time to prepare himself for the onslaught of screams and hugs and kisses. He couldn't help but laugh, really laugh, his voice shocking Sora and Yuffie enough to make them pull away.

Sora smiled softly and quickly swiped a hand over his eyes. "Wow, I almost forgot... the way your laugh sounded."

"Ooooh, Roxy, I'm so happy for you," Yuffie squealed, throwing her arms around the blonde's neck and squeezing. He could just barely feel the sore spot on the side of his neck, covered with tape and gauze. "And I'm so, so happy you're finally awake..."

This caused Roxas to frown in confusion, eyebrows drawing together. The heart monitor on the other side of the bed picked up slightly. "Fi... finally... a... wake?"

Sora bit his lip, almost looking a little guilty. He sighed and scratched the back of his neck, meeting his brother's nervous eyes. "Um... you... you sorta had trouble getting out of anesthesia. And right when you were about to come around, you just... went into a coma."

Roxas blinked, trying to process this information as quickly as possible. "How... long?" he asked, voice just as raspy as before.

"Um... three days, not counting this one. Oh, here." Sora reached down, rummaging through the bag that was at the foot of the chair and pulled out a water bottle. He unscrewed the cap and pressed the bottle to Roxas's lips, smacking the blonde's hands away when he tried to hold it himself.

After downing over half of the bottle, Roxas pulled away and cleared his throat. There was a dull throb in the side of his neck when he did that, but it wasn't so bad, and his voice came out clearer this time. He was almost worried about how he was going to sound, and interestingly enough, he could swear his voice was deeper than the last time he used it. _Puberty, duh. _"Where is everyone...?"

"Well, mom went to go pick up some food," Yuffie said, slumping back in the chair and pulling at the loose threads on her shorts. "But we know she's just doing it to take her mind off you for a bit. She's a _wreck_."

"Zex and Dem and Larxene had to leave because they have a test at school that they can't miss but we're keeping 'em updated. Um, Riku left with mom under our orders just to make sure she didn't drive into a pole or something... Hayner and Olette had to leave for school too, but Rikku stayed with Kairi until last night."

Roxas frowned and sat up, noticing the strange way his brother said the last part. He could practically feel his stomach slowly dropping. "And... where's Axel?"

Sora bit his lip again, looking downright uncomfortable this time. "Er... well... I was getting to that. See... um. When you were in surgery, Kairi got a call from Aeris. She was asking for you. Apparently there's... there's something wrong with Axel. They had to quarantine him."

"Q... quarantine...?!" Roxas choked out, voice escalating and cracking on the last syllable. _Oh, no no no no not now, I can't be too late, fuck fuck fuck-_

"C-calm down," Sora stammered out, jumping up and pushing Roxas back into the bed before he could get himself worked up. Already his blue eyes were wide wide wide and panicky, the heart monitor beeping rapidly beside them. "Yuffie, wanna go get Kairi? And maybe a doctor?"

"Will do, captain..." The girl shot a worried look at Roxas before sprinting out the door, shutting it behind her.

"Let me go...!" Roxas protested, still to weak to resist his brother's hold. His heart was pounding in fear and worry, and he could feel the vertigo washing over him. Axel had spiraled down at the worst possible time, into a place that would be hard to reach. After all... he had been stubbornly trying to resist Roxas since the moment they met.

Sora narrowed his eyes in a silent warning and Roxas relaxed almost immediately, flinching away from the look. "Look, calm down, okay? They won't let out of here any sooner if you act like a maniac, got it? Axel is... well, _okay_. They have him under surveillance at the place Aeris works. And the sooner you calm down and heal up, the sooner they'll let you out of here. Understand?"

Roxas flicked his eyes back up, blue meeting blue with the same angry intensity, but still falling short by a bit. "...Yes," he finally mumbled, voice hissing and cracking. _This isn't really the time to tell me to calm the fuck down. I can't be angry with him, though... He doesn't know. He doesn't remember anything. _He let out a heavy sigh, letting the hand on his chest push him back into the hospital bed and tried to relax. Minutes later, Yuffie came through the door, dragging Kairi and Ansem behind her.

"Oh... Roxas..." The blonde lifted his head, barely having enough time to take in the sight of messy red hair and puffy blue eyes before he was enveloped in a pair of thin, shaky arms. "I'm so glad you're awake..."

Roxas relaxed and wound his arms around her waist, lifting a hand to stroke the back of her head. He could tell how much of a nervous wreck she was, especially with what happened to her brother. "It's okay..."

He heard Kairi sniffle loudly before she pulled away, dabbing at her eyes with her wrists. She tried to smile, fanning her face with her hands, but it cracked into something half-hearted and not really there. "How're you f-feeling?"

"Okay... Throat and neck are... a bit sore... but, y'know..."

The redhead nodded at glanced down, fingers twisting nervously in her lap. Roxas couldn't blame her for being more worried over her brother than him. He was family, blood. "So what... happened?"

"W-well... see, Aeris called me, right?" Kairi paused, swallowing thickly, and Sora stepped closer, wrapping a comforting arm around her shoulders. "Sh-she said something like... Axel went mad or something... a-and there was something about a fire, I don't really remember that well a-anymore. S-so I asked her if I should come over and said she n-needed to see you and th-that was it. But, like... I could just tell by her voice that something b-bad had happened..."

Roxas bit his lip, passing a hand over his face and raking his fingers through his hair. "When is... the soonest I can leave?"

"Doc still has to check you out," Sora mumbled, glancing back at the door. Roxas groaned and fell back against the pillows, throwing his arm over his eyes. He wanted nothing more than to jump out of bed and find Axel, but he knew he wouldn't be able to get away with it... and the sooner he calmed down, the sooner he would get out.

"Ah, Roxas, so you are finally awake." The blonde peeked out from under his arm, watching Ansem step into the room with Yuffie at his heels. "How are you feeling? Are you speaking alright?"

"I'm... okay," Roxas acknowledged with a slightly forced smile. He controlled his breathing, his facial expressions, hell, even the amount of times he blinked while Ansem checked him out, reading his pulse, pressing at his wound, shining a light into his eyes... Bright blonde was all he could see for a few minutes after that. The man really needed a change of hair color.

x.x.x

The cell phone's square screen lit up and Roxas's name flashed across it, the device buzzing loudly against the table. Aeris's head shot up, brown curls frizzy and tangled, fingers skittering along the table until they hit the phone.

"H-hello...?" she mumbled, rubbing her bleary eyes and brushing stray pieces of hair out of her face. For a moment, there was nothing but static, until finally, the voice she wanted to hear cut through, crystal clear.

"Ms. Gainsborough? It's me... Roxas."

"Oh, honey, hello.... I'm so glad to finally hear from you..." The brunette sighed in relief and leaned back in her chair, running her fingers through her haphazard curls. It was the first time she felt this relaxed in days, as though her muscles had been in an iron grip the whole time. "I heard that you couldn't wake up after the surgery. Are you alright?"

"Just fine..." There was a soft chuckle on the other line, but was strained and laced with worry. It seeped like poison through the phone. "But that's not important. What about Axel? Is he okay...?"

Aeris breathed out a soft sigh and lifted a hand, rubbing the bridge of her nose to ward off a sleep-deprivation-induced migraine. "He's a little bit better... He isn't as violent as he was a couple of days ago. The same day you woke up, actually. But you should still come see him as soon as you possibly can. You remember where the facility is, right?"

There was a thick, momentary silence, followed by a soft gasp. "Y-yeah, I do... Sorry, I'm still a bit sleepy from all of the medication... I should probably have someone drive me, huh...?"

In the background, Aeris could hear Roxas's mother's soft clucks of concern, and she smiled. After all, Roxas had only been awake for two days. It was understandable why she would be so concerned. "That would be preferable. I don't want you to get into an accident in your haste."

About half an hour later, though it felt much shorter to everyone else, Roxas, his mother, his brother, his brother's boyfriend, his sister, and Kairi were all crowded together in Aeris's office. There was much shoving and elbowing and cursing from the male party, which was cut short by a very nervous Kairi. Despite how worried she was, she couldn't accompany Roxas and Aeris to the room that had been set up for Axel, and clutched at Riku's and Sora's hands instead, leaving small, crescent-shaped indents in their palms.

"I think I should warn you," Aeris said when she stopped right beside a tall white door, labeled eight in black roman numerals.

_How appropriate_, Roxas thought dryly.

"I'm still not quite sure how stable he is, but I think it's safe to let you inside. Just be careful. If he tries to hurt you, or anything, I'll pop in, alright?"

Roxas nodded, shifted impatiently from foot to foot, eyes glued to Aeris's hand as she reached into her pocked and pulled out a bright silver key. The door swung in seconds later and opened up to the darkness, the only light coming from a window that had been built near the ceiling. Roxas took in a slow deep breath and brushed past Aeris, reaching behind him to grab the handle and close the door behind him. He didn't care what state Axel was in; all he cared about was being alone with him.

Even in the dim light, he could tell the room was completely white, from the long white table that stood against the back wall, to the tall white twisting vase that was overflowing with white flowers (surprisingly, none of this was broken, or burned), to the simple white bed in the corner of the room.

Roxas cocked his head and squinted his eyes, trying to adjust them to the lack of light and make out the figure that was sitting inertly on the edge of the bed. All he could see was two specks of glowing peridot, brighter and more vivid than he ever remembered, from flitting memories, to the vivid dreams. There was a soft chuckle from across the room, laced with something dark and angry and inhuman-

"How nice to see you again... _partner._"

x.x.x

**SO I FINISHED 358 FINALLY. (i stalled because i picked up phoenix wright and just COULDN'T put it and its blatant GAYNESS down. it was epic) So i FINALLY understand EVERYTHING HAHAHAHAHA. it's great. awesome game. last time i cried like that was when i played crisis core and zack died and cloud was just all D: and i BAWLED my EYES out.**

**anyway...**

**merry christmas you guys. or happy holidays, whatever it is that you celebrate : D**

**have fun and review ((lotsoflove))**


	17. 17 : chapter one

**Wow. I kind of can't believe that this is the last chapter... I mean. Oh my god. Holy crap. It only took me THREE YEARS. I don't know what to think, what to say... ((bawls)) Except that YOU GUYS, all of you who read and review and fucking AMAZING AWESOME PEOPLE THAT SHOULD HAVE CONFETTI THROWN AT THEM.**

**...Right. So before I let you go and read the last chapter of this insane fanfic, I just want to vent out a few things while I still have the chance.**

**First and foremost, I am SOOOO sorry this took so long. I checked the last time I updated, and it was like back in December. Holy shit. All I can say is that I was completely stumped, and then laziness took over, followed by a nice dose of writer's block and me moving over to dA for a while. You guys know how I sometimes just pull stories completely out of my ass without any planning, right? Well... this is why this chapter got stuck about... ten paragraphs in.**

**Secondly, don't worry, I'm obviously going to go and write more pointless fic for your (and my own) entertainment. Duh.**

**Thirdly. While I'm going to miss this story sooo much... I am SO glad it's finally over XDDD You don't even understand.**

**Fourth. You might notice that after I post this chapter, this fic will randomly get updated every now and then. ...I will probably be editing. Speaking of editing, I still have to edit ****sunshine in a bag**** because it's just painful to look at.**

**Fifth. Please enjoy the final chapter of ****sweet talk 101****.**

**P.S. TOTALLY LAME ENDING AND POSSIBLE TYPOS WARNING SO IF YOU SEE ANY TYPOS PLEASE TELL ME SO I CAN BE TOTALLY EMBARRASSED LIKE HELL AND THEN GO FIX THEM IN SHAME WOOHOO.**

**sweet** _talk_ 1o1

17 : **chapter one - lifehouse**

A shaky breath escaped Roxas's lips as he took another step inside the room, pulled in by the familiarity of Axel's voice. Smooth and deep and cocky, every word as sharp as the weapons he used to wield. The glowing dots of green narrowed and another chuckle reached the blonde's ears.

"What's wrong, _partner_? Dusk got your tongue?"

Roxas paused, unsure if he should be happy or relieved or just plain scared. He could tell Axel was unstable, judging by the dark tone in his voice, but... he was also back. "...Axel."

"Ah, there we go... For a sec, I thought you went all zombie on me again out of spite."

The redhead was a bit more visible now, his old smirk in place on his lips, with just the tiniest sliver of white from his teeth showing. The expression almost looked feral, animalistic, like a hungry tiger that was just awoken. Axel stretched out a leg, hooking his foot around one of the chairs at the end of the long white table and yanked it out until it was situated in front of him. "Please, do sit. I _insist_."

The words left his lips with a hiss, and a chill raced up Roxas's spine as he did what he was told, sinking down into the cool wood and jumping in surprise when Axel's feet ended up in his lap. "Trying to make me behave with all those nasty pills, partner... That wasn't very nice of you."

"You were out of control," the blonde spoke up matter-of-factly. It seemed that once his voice had returned, the secret was out.

"Oh, but _Roxas_... It wasn't fair to be the only one to remember everything and leave 'Axel' all out in the dark."

It was then that a look of confusion passed through Roxas's features, clouding his blue eyes for a moment. Axel's smirk stretched into a grin as he dropped his legs down on the floor of either side of Roxas's chair and pushed himself off the bed, sliding into the blonde's unprotesting lap. "Out of control? Yeah, right, partner. You should consider yourself lucky that I was trapped in my own subconscious. I would've _never_ let 'Axel' anywhere near you."

Roxas stiffened in the chair, a slight flicker of panic rushing through his eyes before quickly disappearing into those blue depths. This was _Axel_. _His_ Axel. His best friend. The redhead who had fought beside him and trained him and ate ice cream on top of a clock tower with him. There was nothing to fear... he hoped.

"Why?" the boy spoke up finally, lifting his hands and pushing at Axel's chest in an attempt to get him back on the bed... but the redhead quickly gathered his wrists in one hand and yanked them up above the boy's blonde spikes. "After all that... why hate me?" he asked, not at all fazed by the redhead's dominance.

"Now, let's see..." Axel hummed and wound his free hand into the blonde spikes on the back of his captive's head and pulled until Roxas let out a soft gasp and released his control, head tipping back to expose the white column of his throat. Hungry green eyes raked across the lines of muscle in the boy's neck until they found a spot. Hot air puffed up around the pale skin, warm wetness encasing the area for the briefest of moments before Axel pulled away with a satisfied look on his face. Roxas's reaction to the touch was instantaneous, mouth dropping open to let out a tiny moan escape and eyelids drooping over darkening blue irises. His pulse had quickened and his body temperature had shot up and he'd become pleasantly submissive, just the way Axel wanted him. "... Why, oh _why_ would I _ever_ hate you, dearest?"

Axel grinned darkly and dipped his head down, grazing his lips over Roxas's jawline. "You see, love, this new heart of mine... it allowed me to _really_ feel what it was like when you left me. I mean, I thought it was bad enough back then, but this time around, it was like pouring salt into a raw wound, y'know?" Lips skinned back, white teeth tracing the graceful line of Roxas's throat. The boy was frozen under his ministrations, unable to even articulate an response. "You were such a stupid boy... I didn't lie to you because I didn't _want _you... I lied to you because I wanted to keep you by my side. And what did you do? Turned on me and ran away, completely disregarding the fact that I actually cared about you..."

Roxas squirmed, trying to tug his hands free from Axel's strong grip. After hearing that, he finally understood... Axel had come into the next life confused, his new heart bombarded with feelings that he hadn't been able to decipher before. Unlike Roxas, who had accepted his fate and waited patiently for the next time around, Axel was still grieving his loss, even though-

"Axel... please. It's all over now. I'm here, you're here-ah!" Tears sprung to his eyes when Axel's thin fingers circled around his throat, one pressing against the bandage that was still covering his healing wound. A part of him hoped that Aeris would come in and drag him out, effectively ruining the one chance he'd have to break through to the redhead.

Axel grinned sadistically, looking far too pleased with Roxas's reaction. "Did I really matter that little to you? Did my sacrifice really mean nothing?" he asked in a mockingly sing-song voice. "I can't believe I sat there with you in those last moments, _smiling_, when you hurt me like that, when you'll just bring me more _pain_. Is it pity? Is that why you loved me in this life? Because of pity?"

There was a clatter as the chair fell to the floor, and Axel flew back into the bed as Roxas staggered to his feet, gasping for breath and clutching at his chest. He took a step back, eyes trained on Axel's smoldering green eyes. "I h-had to!" he managed to rasp out. "How... else was I supposed to pry you o-off? How else would I... convince myself that I... _had_ to let you go? It... was all I wanted, to stay by your side until we faded into Nothing, b-but..."

Axel sat up slowly, one hand pressed to his chest where Roxas's fist had connected with his ribcage. His face was blank, emotionless, but his bright, angry eyes, were trained on the blonde.

"I wanted so badly, but... I had to... I had to convince myself to hate you, to make you hate me... The world needed Sora. _Everyone_ needed Sora." Roxas shook his head and took another step back, until he bumped into the white table behind him. His eyes were fixed on Axel's pained ones, vision starting to blur and melt together. "You'd be the only one to benefit if I never left. If I had stayed with you, we would only have so long together... We wouldn't be able to go on to an afterlife, or live together in Nothing. We wouldn't exist anymore. I had to go to Sora. For his life and... for the continuation of mine. For everyone else's. I never..." His voice broke off, shattered, and he tried to suppress a sob, burying his face in his hands. "I n-never wanted to h-hurt you... I j-just wanted to be w-with you... E-even if it meant waiting a lifetime for another chance...!"

Revisiting those old memories was painful, a sharp heartache that had never fully dissipated. Days of hollowness, confusion, and feelings that were never fully understood with a lacking heart.

He never saw Axel move, get up from the bed and cross the room in one swift motion, grabbing the blonde's hands and pinning them to the table behind them. Roxas gasped softly and tensed up, waiting for a hit, a punch, something painful and violent. He never expected Axel to lean down, crushing their lips together in a surge of desperation and want. The redhead clutched at him as though he were his last precious breath of air. Roxas squeaked into Axel's mouth, and Axel deepened the kiss, tongue sweeping into his lover's mouth with a sense of comfort and familiarity. It was what he had needed, to hear those words, the truth he'd been yearning to hear for years. Calm had washed over him like a soothing wave, subduing his fiery rage and hurt. He felt like he could breath again, like was was finally free from the chains constricting his heart.

It really hadn't been in vain. He knew there had been a reason when he protected Sora, when he had sacrificed himself for the boy that reminded him so much of the one he loved. Because that boy had been the reason that got another chance at life.

Axel pressed closer, sliding their bodies together and pushing Roxas along the table until the boy was propped up against the wall between his knees.

"It hurt," Axel murmured, pulling away with one chaste kiss. Roxas relaxed in the redhead's grip, under the kisses scattering across his jaw, his cheeks, his nose, his forehead. "It hurt so much when I finally saw you and woke up. I thought that... it was what I had been feeling before, and went along with it, until it intensified to the point of hate. Until I... trapped my heart in my confusion. Fuck." He laughed weakly and pressed his face into Roxas's soft hair, feeling the boy's arms wind around his waist. "I can't believe that having a heart actually made me hate you... God, I'm so stupid."

"No you're not," Roxas assured softly, burying his face into Axel's neck. "You didn't know. I figured you'd be confused when I found you. It's my fault, too, leaving you the way I did. You've every right to hate me."

"I know, but... shit. First you were the confused one, and I guess it was my turn."

"You mean me not catching your completely subtle, backward attempts at making me stay?"

"...Pretty much."

Roxas smiled and pressed closer, nuzzling his nose against Axel's neck, breathing in his familiar scent. "Now we're really together again. We don't have to worry about fading or the Organization or the Heartless..."

"Yeah, that's true..." Axel muttered with a laugh, hooking an arm around Roxas's waist and pulling his other hand through the boy's blonde spikes. "And I'll never let you go for anything."

x.x.x

Roxas was more than reluctant when Aeris showed up and gently told him it was time to leave. "He's alright, so I'll move it him a more comfortable room," she said with a small smile.

"I'm fine right here," Axel mumbled from across the room. He had situated himself back on the stark bed, arms and legs folded and his shoulders pressed against the wall. Aeris's smile tightened, brows raising in question, but Axel only shrugged and waved a hand lazily. "Don't worry. I'm more or less sane now... but, uh, y'know. Thanks for getting Roxas here as soon as you could."

"Yeah," Roxas said, nodding in agreement. He pushed himself away from the edge of the bed, stretching his arms back. "He should probably rest though, for a while. Mental exhaustion."

Axel cocked his head, giving Aeris a weak smile. "I'm okay, Doc... just tired. Came to my senses and everything."

Aeris leaned against the doorjamb and let out the heavy breath that she had been holding for what felt like the past few days. The tension in her shoulders released and she rolled them back. "That's good to hear. Now I want you to rest, you got that? Roxas can come again tomorrow."

The blonde smiled at Axel over his shoulder, holding his hand out. A warmer hand met his halfway, fingers threading together, and gently tugged him over. "Thanks," Axel murmured against the boy's lips, feeling him smile against him.

"It's what I'm here for."

When Roxas straightened out, Aeris was staring awkwardly at the floor, not quite sure where else to look. Roxas smiled to himself and followed when the woman beckoned with a nod of her head, leading him to her office instead of the waiting room.

"...Oh, damn, what happened here?" he muttered, glancing around at the depressingly empty flower pots and vases. They all looked scorched, black rimming the tops and sides, and ashes were scattered among the floor. "Did Axel do this?"

"I don't even know," Aeris said with a weird little laugh. Roxas was reminded of a small, nervous animal. "He was panicking, so I rushed over to make sure he was okay... and when we looked up, it was like this."

The blonde hummed in understanding and knelt down beside a clay pot, poking at the charred remains of flower stalks that jutted out of the dirt like weeds. "He used to do this a lot when he got angry. Go out and burn things. It was one of the few ways he could let off some steam-"

"Okay, hold on!" Aeris interrupted, waving her hands frantically. "Can we first talk about just what the _hell_ has been going on for the past... half year, or so?"

Roxas smiled slightly and rose to his feet. "Do you believe in the theory of past lives?"

Aeris blinked, struck suddenly with the fact that it was the same theory that she had been to skeptical to approach. A possibility, but one out of a million. And here was Roxas, a seemingly normal boy, who was speaking of events that were, well... not so normal.

"...So when Sora decided to save Kairi, he turned himself into a Heartless, which created me-"

The woman could only listen and nod, occasionally asking for a detail to be repeated. It was crazy, far-fetched, asylum-worthy... but at the same time, when Roxas spoke of Hollow Bastion, a city that didn't exist anymore, she felt a wave of nostalgia. The scent of wood and dust and cement, an orange gray sky, violet cliffs and valleys, a towering, twisted castle that pierced the heavens...

"The castle," Aeris began slowly, carefully sifting through small bursts of flashbacks. "... That was where the Heartless were being made, right?"

Roxas nodded, watching as Aeris shook her head in disbelief and slumped back in her chair. "Gods," she groaned, pulling her fingers through her hair. "I'm not even sure what I'm supposed to say at this point."

The blonde boy shrugged, his blue eyes drifting towards the window. "...It was scary and confusing to live back then. Heartless, Nobodies... drifting souls that couldn't find their place. The story sounds so straightforward and to the point, but it wasn't. At least now... we're all here again, and things are normal. All we have to deal with now is the memories and the dreams until we are able to face it and those memories disappear. I lot of people I know now that I knew from my past life... they don't remember a thing. You can only recall tiny bits and pieces. Axel and I... we almost had to relive the nightmare."

Aeris blinked, her hands drifting down to the back of her neck. "Is that what it is? Something happened in your past life that you couldn't come into this one in peace?"

"...When you put it that way, then yeah, I guess so."

"And now?"

"Now? Now... things are going to be better. We've fought a lifetime to be with each other. Y'think I'm going to let something mess that up?"

"...Good boy."

x.x.x

After a few more days of supervision, Aeris decided it was time for Axel to leave recovery. When Roxas came with Kairi to pick him up, there was a girl sitting with him, scratching away at her sketchpad. She was pale as snow, with hair the color of a raven's feathers, and a dress as white as the walls around them. The only thing that stood out were her eyes, a bold oceanic blue like Roxas and Sora's. She was so absorbed in her own work that she didn't even look up when the other two came in.

"Hey guys," Axel said with a grin, beckoning them both over. He had fallen into a natural, easy-going attitude, one that Kairi had been used to before Roxas had shown up, and one that Roxas remembered from his past life. The redhead had calmed, the fake persona he had used in this life now gone. He felt freer, lighter, happier, like he was _supposed_ to with a heart. Of course, this was a secret between him, Roxas, Aeris, and the pale girl that sat with him. No one else knew, and he didn't want to dredge up painful memories for anyone.

"How're you feeling?" Kairi asked, giving him a small, shaky smile. She had been inconsolable in the past few days, worried to the point of sickness. She hardly even ate the Mickey Mouse shaped pancakes that Sora had slaved away at.

"Like a million munny," Axel laughed, pulling Kairi over and planting a kiss on her forehead. "I'm okay, I swear. Oh, by the way, meet Xion. Isn't she a cutie?"

The girl either didn't hear him or chose not to respond, pastel-coated fingertips moving fluidly along the page. Kairi smiled at her and dropped into the empty seat besider her twin.

"Ready to go?" Roxas asked, reaching for the bag that was sitting by Axel's feet.

His boyfriend nodded and then held up a finger, a signal for the boy to wait. He leaned over to the raven-haired girl beside him and nudged her shoulder gently, coaxing those large blue eyes up.

"Hey, Xion... It's time for me to go, okay?" The girl blinked in response and cocked her head, her dark bangs falling over her eyes. Axel grinned at her, curling his fingers gently around hers. "I'll come back to visit you, alright?"

She nodded and briefly squeezed his fingers in farewell, leaving streaks of red and yellow on the pale skin. Roxas stared at their twined fingers silently, nostalgia pulling at farthest corners of his mind, but not quite reaching him. As Axel pulled away and climbed to his feet, Roxas reached out and grabbed the Xion's now-empty hand. Their fingers fit perfectly together, and he could have sworn he remembered holding her hand like this some time, some place, long ago.

"...I'll explain later," Axel murmured quietly, while Kairi gathered up his things. He smiled and gently pulled Roxas's hand out of Xion's surprisingly strong grip, leading him to the door where Aeris was waiting to see them off.

x.x.x

"Yeah, okay," Sora hummed, tapping his fingers against the plastic of his cell phone. Riku glanced up curiously at him from the couch and cocked his head. "Alright... oh, and this is gonna sound completely stupid, but I forgot to buy ice cream, and since you're already on the road, would you mind grabbing some? None of that peanut butter crap... _Ooooh_, yeah the crunchy kind! ...Yes, _and _SeaSalt. Okay, see you soon, Rox!" He snapped his phone shut and shoved it unceremoniously back into his pocket, bouncing back over to the couch and snuggling up against Riku's side. "...Ick, smells too much like Axel."

"Well, it's his house, you'd think it'd smell like him, right?"

Sora rolled his eyes and tilted his head to the side so he could comfortably watch TV. Of course, he and Riku weren't the only ones in the household... Kairi planned for a Welcome Home, Axel party at their house, and once most of the prep (like the second cake because Demyx accidentally tripped over the first) was over and done with, everyone was pretty much left to lounge around the house in wait.

"What's wrong?" Riku asked, leaning down to nuzzle Sora's brown spikes with his nose. "You look very pensive."

The boy shrugged, shoulder rubbing up against Riku's ribcage and sighed softly. "Just thinking about how crazy and weird this school year has been. From the moment Roxas decided to switch schools and Kairi... actually, I blame Kairi for everything. This was all her fault."

"Who knew she could be so devious."

"Who knew she was planning on setting Roxas and Axel up from the beginning? I mean, it's mind-boggling!" Sora yelped, detaching himself from Riku's person to look up at him with wide eyes. "How did she manage to put on such an act without anyone noticing? I mean, look what happened! I'm friends with people that I never considered to like me before! And _that's _all because Axel shoved you, you landed in my crotch, and then you both were scared so shitless that Roxas and I were going to murder you two in your sleep that you ran around trying to make amends which only made things worse but _actually_ made things better because look where we are now and I'm-mmphmmnn-going _out_ with you now, like-mnnn-we're actually _dating-what's so funny_?"

Riku grinned at the brunette and bit down on his lower lip in attempt to smother down his chortles. "The fact that you're trying to explain something unexplainable yet still understandable and keep talking even though I'm trying to kiss you into silence?"

That brought out a blush on Sora's cheeks and the boy looked away with a pout, folding his arms unhappily over his chest. "I just... it's so weird, yet at the same time, it feels... normal. Being with you, like this, feels normal, and being friends with Axel feels normal, and Axel being with Roxas feels _normal_. Like someone upstairs had this all planned out."

"And maybe they did? To be honest, I'm glad things turned out the way they did, y'know?" Riku smiled gently in return to Sora's childishly confused expression. "As much as we want to fight it, some things are just... _meant_ to happen."

Sora's expression softened and he glanced down at Riku's hands before slipping his fingers between the silverette's. "...I know. Everything about this feels right. I wonder if anyone else has the same feeling?" he asked, looking out at his mismatched group of friends, where Demyx was talking animatedly with Hayner over the importance of fluoride in the water, and where Larxene was teaching Olette and Yuffie how to make shurikens out of paper, and where Rikku and Naminé were playing tic tac toe with M&M's while Zexion kept score and doodle on a napkin... More classmates and friends were due to show up soon as well.

"...Probably. But what's the point in sitting there and dwelling on it when there's people waiting for you?"

Sora blinked in surprise, looking like he was coming out of some sort of haze, and narrowed his eyes slightly in thought. "...Hm. I can hear Roxas's car pulling into the driveway."

x.x.x

"Ah, so that's where you went."

Axel jumped slightly and looked over his shoulder where Kairi was struggling to close the sliding door while simultaneously making sure that the cup in her other hand didn't spill over. With a click, the sounds inside the house became muted white noise, and Kairi walked across the deck and sat down beside her brother on the steps. It was getting late, and the oranges and reds that were streaked across the sky were slowly starting to turn purple while fireflies began to blink on and off in the backyard.

"You alright?" Kairi asked, passing a cup of blueberry tea into Axel's hands. The taller redhead nodded, cradling the cup in his hands.

"Yeah. Just needed to take a breather. Nothing's wrong."

Kairi hummed and set her elbows on her knees, dropping her chin into her open palms. "...We should all go to the beach soon, what with school ending and all."

"Yeah? Just pack up a few cars and drive off to Destiny Islands, yeah?"

"Oh my god, that would be amazing..."

Axel chuckled softly and swung an arm out, catching Kairi by the shoulders and dragging her against his side. "How about _you_? Are _you_ okay? I know you were pretty worried. Sora told me you couldn't even eat his pancakes."

"Of course I was worried, stupid!" the petite redhead bit back, smacking Axel in the thigh. "I don't care how much of a pain in the ass you are, you're still my brother, and all I've got at home while mom and dad are on the other side of the world. Oh, and speaking of, they're taking a break from their business trip to come home for a few weeks."

"What, real estate isn't selling in Radiant Garden?"

"Oh, no, it's selling. Did you hear? They uncovered some of the old architecture that existed during Hollow Bastion's time, and the moment people saw it, they went gaga over it. They're just coming home to see us and... Iunno. Recharge."

"...Was that a Lady Gaga reference?"

"Maybe." Kairi laughed brightly and turned her face to the side, burying it in Axel's shirt. Her fingers slipped down to his knee, playing with the small rip in his jeans. "...Look, I wanted to apologize for being such an abomination before... y'know, at the beginning of all this? When I was kind of acting like a-"

"-Ho?" Axel supplied helpfully, the grin on his face showing that he was only teasing.

Kairi rolled her eyes skyward and smacked him again. "For lack of a better word, yes. I know that we didn't get along before either, but... you know I love you, right? And hope to never act like some Abercrombie and Fitch cookie cutout ever again? And that I was only trying to set you and Roxas up?"

"Yeah, yeah, I love you, too-wait. What? Set us up?" Axel blinked in surprise and drew back slightly, regarding his sister with an arched brow. "...My, I didn't know you could be so... _devious._"

"It was more of a joke at first," Kairi sighed, twisting a strand of hair around her finger. "But then... when I thought about it, for some reason, I thought you two would look good together, and... y'know. Things escalated rather painfully from there."

Axel hummed in understanding and brought the mug to his lips. He wished he could tell her the truth about him and Roxas... but what was the use in dredging up old memories in their new life? When they already had everything they needed? It was just churn up questions, and dangerous trains of thought... No, it was better to let everyone who noticed dwell on it on their own, and then eventually let their thoughts fade away to the background while they continued on with their life and moved forward. Sora and Riku had already done it... and so had Zexion and Demyx...

"It's alright. I'm obviously not mad at you or anything."

"Heh. I noticed."

The two lapsed into silence for a while, watching tiny yellow lights flicker on and off among blades of grass that really needed to be cut. Kairi had to figure out a way to bribe Axel into mowing the lawn... Or maybe she could convince Riku to do it.

"So are you okay now?" she asked, bringing them gently out of the pensive quiet.

"Like, mentally? Yeah. Completely. In my own personal opinion, I think it was just a way for me to reject all the things that were happening... like there was me, and then the other me deep inside my head that kind of... personified the ideas I had conjured up for myself, y'know?" It wasn't exactly the truth, but at least it wasn't too far from it either. "I just... you know that game Persona that Riku and Sora play all the time? Where you have to face your true psyche and kind of... overcome it? It was kind of like that."

Kairi stared at him a little strangely, one eye squinted, with the opposite eyebrow arched high on her forehead. "...You guys play too many video games."

"I'm serious!" Axel laughed, gently nudging the girl in the side, resulting in a highly competitive game of teeter-totter.

The door behind the suddenly slid open with a whir, the sound of bare feet lightly hitting the wood. "...Should I, uh... come back later?"

With a final shove that nearly sent Axel's mug flying out of his hands, Kairi jumped up with a bright smile and dusted off the seat of her shorts. "Nope! He's all yours!"

Roxas grinned and went to take Kairi's empty seat, throwing himself into Axel's arms as soon as the door had slid shut.

Axel chuckled and set the mug down, grabbing Roxas under the arms and hauling the boy into his lap. "What's up, Fox?" he murmured, tilting his head down to press a firm kiss to Roxas's lips. Roxas responded eagerly, parting his lips under the redhead's and shifting his position so that he was comfortably straddling Axel's lap. Once they slowly pulled away from each other, both taking in deep gulps of air, Roxas shuffled back a bit so that he could rest his forehead in the curve of Axel's neck.

"How do you feel?"

"Like I'm losing the circulation in both my legs," Axel replied smartly, receiving a smack to the chest. He laughed in amusement and grabbed Roxas's hand before he could pull away, lifting his fingers to his lips. "Like I have the most gorgeous boy in the world sitting in my lap and snogging me?"

"Much better."

The redhead smirked mischievously and went from kissing Roxas's knuckles to sucking his fingertips. The blonde boy slipped a small moan on accident and yelped, yanking his hand back and hiding his blushing face behind it. "Shit, save it for later, Axel..."

"Spoilsport," Axel grumbled, dipping his head to scattered a few brief kisses up Roxas's neck before pulling away. He smiled softly at the boy in his arms and slid his grip down to Roxas's waist, leaning their foreheads together. "So you think things will be okay between us now?"

Roxas hummed in mock thought, lifting his hands from Axel's shoulders to card his fingers through his long red tresses. "Of course. Don't you think we've been through enough shit already? I'm sure _someone's_ taking pity on us. Unless, like, y'know... you cheat on me or something, then I'll have to kick your skinny ass."

"Me? Cheat on you? Shiva, Roxas, I can't believe you think so lowly of me."

"Well, someone has to."

"...Jerk."

"You love it."

A cricket hopped past them, chirping loudly, before darting off the steps and into the grassy jungle below. Roxas smiled, watching it hop away, and turned back to his boyfriend. "Things will be okay. And even if they're not, then I'll make 'em."

"That's right, Roxas. Be the boss."

The blonde smirked and quirked his eyebrows, shifting his hips a little closer to Axel's. "I hope everyone leaves soon, so I can _really_ be the boss."

Axel gave him a disbelieving look, but his body heat definitely shot up when Roxas grinded his hips down. "...Christ, save it for later, Roxas, there's people waiting to play Twister with us." He gave Roxas a deep kiss to compensate for his wait and climbed to his feet, Roxas still clutched tightly in his arms. The blonde laughed and threw his arms around Axel's neck, slim legs winding around his waist. "Then you can be the boss all you want."

"Are you going to tell me about Xion?"

"Before or after the sex?"

"...After obviously."

Axel chuckled and tilted his head up, pressing a small kiss to Roxas's nose. "Let's not worry about tomorrow, or the future, because whatever it is, it's just a little later on."

Roxas nodded slowly, his deep oceanic blues meeting Axel's intensely bright, green orbs. They held on to each other like that for a moment longer while the sun sank beyond the white picket fence and fireflies blinked around them like tiny white christmas lights.

"I'm glad you're back, Axel."

_End._


End file.
